Dan ChickHolla
@danchickholla.bsky.social
1.8K followers 9.2K following 1K posts
a joke a day keeps the impending sense of doom at bay
Posts Media Videos Starter Packs
Reposted by Dan ChickHolla
danchickholla.bsky.social
my comedy is very relatable for people who also aren’t funny
danchickholla.bsky.social
people who represent the left: anyone with a bad take on twitter, any college student clipped out of context, someone holding a sign at a protest

people who don’t represent the right: the president, the entire party bowing to the president, the young republicans
danchickholla.bsky.social
the next innovation will be court cases. why are we wasting everyone’s time with the docket and briefings and opinions and all that. the president should just tweet “this is illegal but I’m gonna do it anyway” and the supreme court can just say “of course mr president” and then go eat a sundae
danchickholla.bsky.social
one of the greatest government inefficiencies before trump came along was corruption: back channels, dark money, shell companies. why not streamline the whole thing and just directly allocate congressional apportioned funds to influence local elections?
atrupar.com
Trump and Bessent clarify that they will only help out Argentina as long as Milei is in power. Trump adds that the same thing goes with NYC, where the White House will hold up funds if Mamdani wins.
danchickholla.bsky.social
it’s actually only a plurality of replies, not wholly half of them

learn the difference
Reposted by Dan ChickHolla
danchickholla.bsky.social
I should really learn how to take a compliment before fishing for them
danchickholla.bsky.social
through the magic of ai, soon you’ll be able to read a pitchfork review that skips the opening anecdote about the first time the writer tried cottage cheese
Reposted by Dan ChickHolla
danchickholla.bsky.social
me at 10 years old every time I hung out with adults “why do you always make the same jokes?”

me at 38 every time I see a decorative urn: “who’s in here?”
danchickholla.bsky.social
willy wonka: no time for questions, here they come. now gimme that cane I’m boutta prank the shit out of these kids
danchickholla.bsky.social
willy wonka: remember, loompas, if anyone breaks the rules, we’ll fucking kill them!

oompa loompas: okaaay…

willy wonka: unless they’re the main character, then we’ll give them the whole factory!

oompa loompas: the main character of what?
danchickholla.bsky.social
I should really learn how to take a compliment before fishing for them
danchickholla.bsky.social
tune in for my stream tonight where I analyze rent’s acerbic critique of the clinton family
danchickholla.bsky.social
a common misconception is that the person who wrote rent died of aids, in fact he was killed by the clintons because he got too close to the truth
danchickholla.bsky.social
nothing would make a better case for us than some billionaire who’s capitalism’s equivalent of joe flacco going on twitter and crying about how unjust it’d be for them to only make $184 million dollars
danchickholla.bsky.social
the left should lean into how surprising people find it that we defend superstar athletes’ wealth

make the tom brady rule. greatest financial planner of all time? you make $39,420,588 a year. a company does the equivalent of winning 7 super bowls? its ceo should make $333m over their career
adamserwer.bsky.social
Obviously a category that includes superstar athletes and janitors has some conceptual flaws but the traditional marxist definition of working class (relationship to the means of production) has value because the dynamic is between labor and management is the relevant one in the workplace context
Reposted by Dan ChickHolla
danchickholla.bsky.social
@benandjerry you act all self-righteous like you’ve got the Right Politics™ when you haven’t replied to a single fan letter asking if your turtle ice cream is rafael or michaelangelo flavored
danchickholla.bsky.social
“Do you think a nuke should be dropped on Louisiana?”

Mike Johnson: I’m not a nuclear scientist. I’m not here to talk about fusion and fission.
atrupar.com
Q: Do you agree that the mayor of Chicago and governor of Illinois should be in prison?

MIKE JOHNSON: Should they be in prison? I'm not the attorney general. I'm not following the day to day on that
danchickholla.bsky.social
my advice for getting by in entertainment is to always be nice to everyone, that way it won’t be so obvious when you cozy up to someone the second they have some clout to chase
danchickholla.bsky.social
I love the anticipation each time a dental hygienist puts a tool in my mouth as I wait to find out if it’s one of the tooth massagers or the nerve scrapers
danchickholla.bsky.social
logging into x.com to see what the guy who wrote a dating book called “dogs are boys, cats are girls” has to say about the situation in portland
danchickholla.bsky.social
guy [holding court near the dips at the party]: she hasn’t had sex with anyone for the same reason she hasn’t had sex with me: because she isn’t real

me [deciding I’ll just eat my chips plain]: that’s really deep man, I gotta go help with something real quick
laurajedeed.bsky.social
I'm sorry: "if I wish to see a virgin on-screen"?
My Favorite Actress Is Not Human
Tilly Norwood doesn’t need a hairstylist, has no regrettable posts, and if you wish to see a virgin on-screen, this is one of your better chances. That’s because she’s AI.

A picture of some AI girl standing on an AI landscape with an AI monster behind her. I'm gonna be so real: she looks about 14

By Tyler Cowen