Lightnews — Scholar-powered news

Dan Clyne @danclyne.bsky.social · 10h

Movie Quotes

“…shrimp creole…”

- Forrest Gump

Dan Clyne @danclyne.bsky.social · 8d

A Freddy Krueger glove slashed through the window, creating a big hole where a window had once been.

“Who’s there?” cried the attempting sleeper

“Freddy Krueger,” said Freddy Krueger

8

Dan Clyne @danclyne.bsky.social · 8d

On “ETA Was 10 Minutes Ago, and The Restaurant Has Its Own Delivery Guy So I Can’t Track Him,” we find Swift at her most vulnerable. Pain and frustration quickly turns to hopelessness at the realization that the situation is simply out of her control.

8

Dan Clyne @danclyne.bsky.social · 10d

I like darker, more dark elements.

2

Dan Clyne @danclyne.bsky.social · 10d

2-for-1 tonight, because I’m trying to drive engagement as a Blue Sky Plus account

The phone rang. It said “UNKNOWN CALLER”

The naked woman answered

“hello?”

the caller

“I’d be a KNOWN caller if I told you my name. It’s Dracula”

2 19

Dan Clyne @danclyne.bsky.social · 10d

It’s October, so I’ll be popping in to drop some of my famous one-post horror stories. Starting with this:

The moon astronaut stepped off the ship, only to be greeted by a scary werewolf. The werewolf (speaking thru an interpreter) said, “up here on the moon, it’s ALWAYS a full moon”

3 5 32

Dan Clyne @danclyne.bsky.social · 14d

Signed up for 5 minutes at the Riyadh open mic tonight

11

Dan Clyne @danclyne.bsky.social · 24d

Finally understand what that 90’s band was getting at

Ezra Klein @ezrakleinbot.bsky.social · 24d

"I had friends say to me, look, we can oppose political violence without whitewashing this guy. I spent some time thinking about that over the weekend...and my reaction honestly is that it is too little to just say we oppose political violence."

9

Dan Clyne @danclyne.bsky.social · 25d

Boycotting the NFL if they don’t add Charlie Kirk wigs to every team’s helmets by this weekend

1 1 48

Dan Clyne @danclyne.bsky.social · Sep 3

Dominos by the slice would be so unbelievably sad

2

Dan Clyne @danclyne.bsky.social · Sep 3

They are known for their delivery tracker!

2

Dan Clyne @danclyne.bsky.social · Sep 3

(with the sly smirk of a man who knows he’s about to nail it)

I don’t know much about AOC, other than to stay the heck out her way at the bra store 😏

12

Dan Clyne @danclyne.bsky.social · Sep 3

Ignoring the pot/kettle aspect and just asking what the hell is a Dominos Pizza line? When was the last time you’ve been outside?

Aaron Rupar @atrupar.com · Sep 3

Ted Cruz: "I don't want to get between JB Pritzker and the Dominos Pizza line, but I'll tell you what I am willing to get between -- him and his open doors for every human trafficker ... "

4 1 24

Dan Clyne @danclyne.bsky.social · Aug 30

I’ve seen NIN around 10 times and every time I pray for a surprise Slam Bamboo reunion

10

Dan Clyne @danclyne.bsky.social · Aug 30

imo, Donald Trump should not have laid in state in the Capitol rotunda if he was still alive. Thats where this all started

8

Dan Clyne @danclyne.bsky.social · Aug 22

The new Deftones is so fucking good. One of like maybe 3 good things in the world right now

6

Dan Clyne @danclyne.bsky.social · Aug 22

You spoke, we listened. Cracker Barrel is re-rebranding to a cartoon of Jesus in a leather jacket. We aren’t Cracker Barrel anymore either, our name is that cartoon, however you want to say it. Also the bathroom changing tables are equipped to handle 300+ lbs for mandatory adult genital inspections

10