Dimitri Allen
@dimitriallen.bsky.social
Scientist and amateur bartender
(Parody account)
(Parody account)
Huh…
The house is dark…? Did the power go out?
The house is dark…? Did the power go out?
May 24, 2025 at 11:40 AM
Huh…
The house is dark…? Did the power go out?
The house is dark…? Did the power go out?
I was thinking about planning a date for Claire and I. Hopefully something better than our last..
April 23, 2025 at 5:15 PM
I was thinking about planning a date for Claire and I. Hopefully something better than our last..
I keep coughing. I do detest being sick.
April 12, 2025 at 3:51 PM
I keep coughing. I do detest being sick.
Where did you all come from…
April 12, 2025 at 2:51 PM
Where did you all come from…
I seriously have been unable to think these last few days. I’m up for an hour or two and then I crash again for hours. I can’t stay awake for the life of me.
April 12, 2025 at 1:33 AM
I seriously have been unable to think these last few days. I’m up for an hour or two and then I crash again for hours. I can’t stay awake for the life of me.
Eugh.. I believe I’m falling ill again. Goodness, what is with my health recently ??
April 8, 2025 at 5:39 PM
Eugh.. I believe I’m falling ill again. Goodness, what is with my health recently ??
I hardly remember these last few days. I’ve been overwhelmed by some kind of sickness, that of which I’m still recovering from. Claire as well.
I hope none of the kids caught whatever bug we had.
I hope none of the kids caught whatever bug we had.
April 5, 2025 at 1:59 PM
I hardly remember these last few days. I’ve been overwhelmed by some kind of sickness, that of which I’m still recovering from. Claire as well.
I hope none of the kids caught whatever bug we had.
I hope none of the kids caught whatever bug we had.
OH SHIT I FORGOT ABOUT CELESTE. OH GOD I HOPE CLARK FOUND HER. WHERE IS SHE.
March 30, 2025 at 5:08 PM
OH SHIT I FORGOT ABOUT CELESTE. OH GOD I HOPE CLARK FOUND HER. WHERE IS SHE.
I don’t remember how I got home. I don’t remember much of anything actually. Hm..
March 30, 2025 at 11:41 AM
I don’t remember how I got home. I don’t remember much of anything actually. Hm..
If I can get the other two Claires mad at me I’ll be 4/4 in fucking up the best relationship of my life. Haha!!
I haven’t had a drink in… just about a week? Now’s a good of a time as any.
I haven’t had a drink in… just about a week? Now’s a good of a time as any.
March 29, 2025 at 6:50 PM
If I can get the other two Claires mad at me I’ll be 4/4 in fucking up the best relationship of my life. Haha!!
I haven’t had a drink in… just about a week? Now’s a good of a time as any.
I haven’t had a drink in… just about a week? Now’s a good of a time as any.
I really have ruined everything for so many people.
March 29, 2025 at 2:19 AM
I really have ruined everything for so many people.
I slept longer than I meant to. I know there wasn’t a set time to pick Celeste up but she’s likely overstayed her welcome.
I hope she hasn’t blown anything up.
I hope she hasn’t blown anything up.
March 28, 2025 at 11:41 PM
I slept longer than I meant to. I know there wasn’t a set time to pick Celeste up but she’s likely overstayed her welcome.
I hope she hasn’t blown anything up.
I hope she hasn’t blown anything up.
I hope Celeste isn’t causing too many problems. I’m exhausted.
March 28, 2025 at 7:06 PM
I hope Celeste isn’t causing too many problems. I’m exhausted.
002:
Lab equipment has been tampered with. I have a sneaking suspicion that the lock mechanism Claire and I implemented is no longer effective. We will have to try a new one.
Lab equipment has been tampered with. I have a sneaking suspicion that the lock mechanism Claire and I implemented is no longer effective. We will have to try a new one.
March 28, 2025 at 1:45 PM
002:
Lab equipment has been tampered with. I have a sneaking suspicion that the lock mechanism Claire and I implemented is no longer effective. We will have to try a new one.
Lab equipment has been tampered with. I have a sneaking suspicion that the lock mechanism Claire and I implemented is no longer effective. We will have to try a new one.
There’s a fly in the lab. How did it get down here.
March 28, 2025 at 1:35 AM
There’s a fly in the lab. How did it get down here.
001:
I’m not sure where to start. The graduation of memories that clash together are making less and less sense. I’m unable to sift between which are mine and which are implanted from the universe.
Am I losing my mind?
I’m not sure where to start. The graduation of memories that clash together are making less and less sense. I’m unable to sift between which are mine and which are implanted from the universe.
Am I losing my mind?
March 23, 2025 at 10:57 PM
001:
I’m not sure where to start. The graduation of memories that clash together are making less and less sense. I’m unable to sift between which are mine and which are implanted from the universe.
Am I losing my mind?
I’m not sure where to start. The graduation of memories that clash together are making less and less sense. I’m unable to sift between which are mine and which are implanted from the universe.
Am I losing my mind?
If we’re sticking anyone in the basement it will be him.
March 22, 2025 at 2:44 AM
If we’re sticking anyone in the basement it will be him.
I can only hope that little Dimitri isn’t stupid enough to hurt someone. I’ve got to get that taser from him.
March 21, 2025 at 8:32 PM
I can only hope that little Dimitri isn’t stupid enough to hurt someone. I’ve got to get that taser from him.
If you told me last year that I would be taking care of multiple children I would have laughed in your face.
March 20, 2025 at 2:04 PM
If you told me last year that I would be taking care of multiple children I would have laughed in your face.
I wasn’t actually prepared for him to show up. Help.
March 19, 2025 at 10:37 PM
I wasn’t actually prepared for him to show up. Help.
Oh Jesus Christ. Get the basement ready.
March 19, 2025 at 10:31 PM
Oh Jesus Christ. Get the basement ready.
Goodness I hope my younger self doesn’t show up. I don’t want to have to deal with him.
March 19, 2025 at 2:22 PM
Goodness I hope my younger self doesn’t show up. I don’t want to have to deal with him.
I am a man. I’m a man?
I’m a man. Definitely. Yes.
…
Maybe.
I’m a man. Definitely. Yes.
…
Maybe.
March 10, 2025 at 9:55 PM
I am a man. I’m a man?
I’m a man. Definitely. Yes.
…
Maybe.
I’m a man. Definitely. Yes.
…
Maybe.