Samantha Unseemly
banner
fictionaluser.bsky.social
Samantha Unseemly
@fictionaluser.bsky.social
Merging online with reality, slowly 🏳️‍🌈🇨🇦🧡🇵🇸🏳️‍⚧️
Late 30s
Pinned
OK.

I am done with hating myself starting today.
Cashier at Sobeys complimented me on my nails 💅

Asked if they were lavender and I didn't know, but now I do, Babe Blue, so I'll know for next time!
November 25, 2025 at 7:20 PM
Oh yeah, that's more my speed
November 25, 2025 at 6:04 PM
Does anyone know a good place to ask beginner #makeup questions?
November 25, 2025 at 3:18 PM
And today with the same breakfast I'm HI with only taking a little less insulin and keeping the glucose tablets close.

For fucks sake, nothing but dice rolls.
Fuck youuuuuuuu, 52grams glucose tablets btw
November 25, 2025 at 3:16 PM
How do you be a human. How do you do that. Do they make a Dummies Guide? A Youtube Short? Do I take a college course?

Can I get there by making banger skeets? Probably, I'mma keep trying that route.
November 25, 2025 at 1:47 AM
Reposted by Samantha Unseemly
November 24, 2025 at 4:58 PM
>Eating Cheeseburger, supporting American cuisine.

*Flashbacks, worry and the realization of what I've done sets in*

I must talk to people about this immediately. On the internet.
the way i gasped & choked at this
November 25, 2025 at 1:42 AM
I did the magic shave powder on my face and left it on too long and my face is raw AF and was bleeding a bit at the time. And it didn't really work that well. Next up is the epilator test.

'epilator' isn't in firefox's spell check. Pretty lame FF.
November 25, 2025 at 1:28 AM
The Mask shows up. He's impressed and does an over the top bow with a ridiculous hat. You feel something behind you pat your shoulder and turn to look, it's his disconnected white glove, you turn back and he's wearing it now, continuing the pat and bringing you in close.

"You've really got it, kid"
I’m done looking respectfully. I’m ogling. I’m awoogaing. I’m jumping up and down and fanning myself in an exaggerated manner.
November 25, 2025 at 1:25 AM
Fuck youuuuuuuu, 52grams glucose tablets btw
November 24, 2025 at 5:51 PM
Taking my antistraightotics prescription to help with my posting problems
November 24, 2025 at 3:25 AM
Buying vintage playboys and hiding them in the woods to preserve our history and traditions
November 24, 2025 at 3:22 AM
Penciling in the 3 minutes my dick works every month for waiting in line at the bank. Yeah, yeah good move.
November 24, 2025 at 3:17 AM
Having trouble finding a ghost writer to write my tweets, none of them flop 80% of the time
November 24, 2025 at 2:40 AM
Trying out new names with my Starbucks order but immediately forgetting I've done so and wondering why my drink order is taking so long.
November 24, 2025 at 2:38 AM
Maybe a nice enough ass can bring about world peace?
A really nice ass. Sorry world peace, I remembered you too late
November 24, 2025 at 2:34 AM
One genie wish, 5 seconds to think. GO
November 24, 2025 at 2:31 AM
The next time I see bot tan I'm going to be mean to it.

I'm sorry @bot-tan.suibari.com, I won't mean it
November 24, 2025 at 2:22 AM
@sheev.calamitousintent.com & Samantha showing significant S-starting speech
November 24, 2025 at 1:54 AM
Reposted by Samantha Unseemly
Never pass up the opportunity to share my favorite meme on that whole thing
November 23, 2025 at 10:57 PM
Reposted by Samantha Unseemly
"I hope they lower the curtain soon."
"You think the story's over?"
"No but at least we'll have a satisfying transition!!"
"BOHOHOHOHOHO"
statler and waldorf critiquing my gender performance
October 19, 2025 at 2:47 AM
Hmm
November 23, 2025 at 10:31 PM
Lol, currently kneeling on the floor about to apply velcro to the bottom of the couch cushion, I already stuck the other side to the couch itself.

Was about to post asking about dating apps for friends being legit or not?

Then I noticed my nails and had a makeup question I was going to Discord for
November 23, 2025 at 5:16 PM
Good night, sleep tight enough to worry your doctor, ultra fucking tight, tight as fuck dawg
November 23, 2025 at 7:51 AM
Dot jif peanut butter extension
November 23, 2025 at 7:48 AM