Author | Lightnews

Lars Andersen @lkjandersen.bsky.social · 1h

!!!

a man is dancing in a living room next to a couch and a table .

ALT: a man is dancing in a living room next to a couch and a table .

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Lars Andersen @lkjandersen.bsky.social · 6h

One thing to notice, this story was apparently sourced from The Daily Mail, a rightwing gossip-rag similar to the New York Post. Some suggest that it's a smear campaign ahead of his divorce. Though one doesn't preclude the other, the Allen camp might have leaked it.

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Lars Andersen @lkjandersen.bsky.social · 6h

Well, he didn't really need it, it was just to keep it away from a dying child.

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Lars Andersen @lkjandersen.bsky.social · 7h

He made the friend apologize in public for being shot in the face. I mean, say what you want, that's a big swinging Dick move.

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Lars Andersen @lkjandersen.bsky.social · 7h

I wonder if Ben Shapiro has like a tiny small hint of introspection that he contributed heavily to this, or is he fully "how on earth did this happen?"

a man dressed in a hot dog costume with a yellow sausage

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Lars Andersen @lkjandersen.bsky.social · 7h

I think that shows the extreme bubble they live in, that they think Stephen "We Got Goebbels At Home" Miller might turn the tides.

Reposted by Lars Andersen

Lars Andersen @lkjandersen.bsky.social · 10h

I barely mind it being a cult, but does it have to be such a stupid cult dedicated to such a stupid person? "I worship Zoxoqo XIIIX, the benevolent millenium-emperor of a thousand planets." " I worship Donald Trump. He's dumb and mean!"

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Lars Andersen @lkjandersen.bsky.social · 10h

I barely mind it being a cult, but does it have to be such a stupid cult dedicated to such a stupid person? "I worship Zoxoqo XIIIX, the benevolent millenium-emperor of a thousand planets." " I worship Donald Trump. He's dumb and mean!"

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Lars Andersen @lkjandersen.bsky.social · 10h

a woman in a leather jacket is laughing in a police station .

ALT: a woman in a leather jacket is laughing in a police station .

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Lars Andersen @lkjandersen.bsky.social · 10h

Whaddaya know, evil does die. Rest in piss, Dick Cheney.

a man in a vest is dancing in a living room with a couch and chairs

ALT: a man in a vest is dancing in a living room with a couch and chairs

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Lars Andersen @lkjandersen.bsky.social · 11h

RIP Diane Ladd, 89 years old. A good run.

Lars Andersen @lkjandersen.bsky.social · 11h

Maybe they are just a doting grandma and a gardening-grandpa, and that falls neatly into coverstories.

Plus, the Armitages find it much easier to explain that they ostensibly hired the nurses who took care of the grandparents to be servants, rather than them being, say, friends of the family.

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Lars Andersen @lkjandersen.bsky.social · 19h

I think everyone?

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Lars Andersen @lkjandersen.bsky.social · 20h

Everyone knows that to be a successful politician, your wife has to hate you with every fiber of her being! How do you expect to win an election if your significant other isn't disgusted by your very existence???

a woman in a trench coat is smiling next to a man in a suit .

ALT: a woman in a trench coat is smiling next to a man in a suit .

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Lars Andersen @lkjandersen.bsky.social · 20h

So they clearly ran out of J names sometime before she was born but still kept having children? That's just poor planning.

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Lars Andersen @lkjandersen.bsky.social · 20h

Jinger Duggar sounds like about six different slurs smooshed together.

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Lars Andersen @lkjandersen.bsky.social · 1d

Is anyone setting up a class-action lawsuit, because apparently editing interviews is like super illegal?

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Lars Andersen @lkjandersen.bsky.social · 1d

The only man who could call Greg Davies little in the same tone Greg Davies calls Alex Horne.

Lars Andersen @lkjandersen.bsky.social · 1d

You'd think that he'd finally have time to read some news now that he's not working. Maybe he is trying to catch up from the start? No spoilers, he's only at the Hessian war.

Reading Newspaper Zhivago1955 GIF

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Lars Andersen @lkjandersen.bsky.social · 1d

a close up of a woman 's face with the words `` i have this crazy theory '' written above her .

ALT: a close up of a woman 's face with the words `` i have this crazy theory '' written above her .

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Lars Andersen @lkjandersen.bsky.social · 1d

Oh no, Staten Island is going to be a barren wasteland run by the Wu-Tang Clan.

a man in a suit and tie is dancing in front of a sign that says via corp

ALT: a man in a suit and tie is dancing in front of a sign that says via corp

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Lars Andersen @lkjandersen.bsky.social · 1d

Oopsie doodles, I accidentally picked the words from the most notorious and reviled gate in western civilization to replicate.

a close up of a man in a suit and tie with the name david worren on the bottom

ALT: a close up of a man in a suit and tie with the name david worren on the bottom

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Lars Andersen @lkjandersen.bsky.social · 1d

Who do I contact at CBS to get my 10 million for that heavily edited Trump interview on 60 Minutes. Do they do direct deposit, or a check or something?

a woman sitting at a table talking to a man who says money pleeeeease

Alt: money pleeeeease

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Lars Andersen @lkjandersen.bsky.social · 1d

I assume they are only granted the interview on the understanding that they won't factcheck or ask followups. In which case, I don't know why anyone bothers.

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Lars Andersen @lkjandersen.bsky.social · 1d

I dunno, he does lie all the time, but he also has dementia and ministrokes and his handlers do a lot of shady shit they keep him out of because he can't keep his fat mouth shut for five fucking seconds. And also he is very stupid.

a man in a suit and tie is smiling and clapping

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