Max Burbank
@mxburbank.bsky.social
4.1K followers 3.1K following 6.6K posts
Dad, husband, pants aficionado, raconteur, former pussycat dollI; permanently suspended from Twitter before it was cool to not be on Twitter. Life-long-lefty; Comedy archive at maxburbank.wordpress.com I BLOCK CRYPTO DUDES!
Posts Media Videos Starter Packs
Pinned
mxburbank.bsky.social
www.youtube.com/watch?v=L3C6...
This is like watching stop motion animation of two expired beef rectums repeatedly slamming into each other while the Benny Hill theme plays in the background.
Israel Iran War: Tucker Carlson Clashes with US Senator Ted Cruz Over Iran | N18G
YouTube video by Firstpost
www.youtube.com
mxburbank.bsky.social
"It's true, I don't know who she is which is why I try to mention her every day."
mxburbank.bsky.social
"Listen listen!" RFK Jr. croaked, "I have to tell you some other made up things that definitely happened that I'm not just making up right now. OK? You ready? This morning? I pooped a magical wish granting frog. And it told me if you masturbate, you go Autism."
Reposted by Max Burbank
thewritertype.bsky.social
Please can I have a Nobel peace prize, I helped a friend of mine murder a bunch of his neighbours and now I’ve told him to stop, so I’ve definitely done a peace. Give me the prize immediately please, not that anything could possibly go wrong, but just give it to me now, or else.
mxburbank.bsky.social
"And I want to remind you that we agree before this interview you would not ask me if I had even the faintest idea what the word "reasonable" means."
mxburbank.bsky.social
In preparation for the Nobel Peace Prize being announced later this week, White House staff have begun removing all ketchup from the building.
Reposted by Max Burbank
letaseletzky.com
As it turns out, not only were we NOT overreacting, we were underreacting 🫠
mxburbank.bsky.social
We promise we won't yank the football away this time, Charlie Brown.
mxburbank.bsky.social
How often is this chuckle-head moron going to publicly demonstrate that he has no idea how numbers work? The fucking PRESIDENT OF THE UNITED STATES, who has been alive 79 YEARS, DOES NOT KNOW that a number can only be reduced by 100%, because that's ALL OF whatever number you're talking about!
mxburbank.bsky.social
It is critically important that we make sure as many people as possible learn the definition of the word "Plenary". I'd post, but I want you to Google it now, because that needs to be the most searched word using Google ever. And I don't think most people have any idea what it means.
Reposted by Max Burbank
bft.wtf
My stance is very simple: dems should negotiate as soon as, and not before, every impounded dollar is restored, every illegally fired employee is restored, every unconstitutional act is reversed
Reposted by Max Burbank
mxburbank.bsky.social
I agree this is funny, and I'm not arguing against the functionality of making fun of fascists, but it should also be noted that this is literally the government laying groundwork for the wholesale slaughter of American citizens. Zero hyperbole intended.
mxburbank.bsky.social
Golly, what do you think the chances are the announcement is about her selling some shit, like make-up or clothing or NFT's or supplements or credit cards?
mxburbank.bsky.social
I'm correct in stating that Bari Weiss has zero experience running a Television news company, right? Like, none at all? Well, I'm sure it will be fine. I mean, how difficult could it be, do you think. Couldn't any random person do that job? No? Are you saying you'd have to know things about stuff?
mxburbank.bsky.social
Apparently, MAGA's #1 policy priority is protecting wealthy child molesters.
Reposted by Max Burbank
leftistlawyer.com
Whilst we're on the subject of shocking living things, did you know police departments routinely shock human beings with tasers until they die and chalk up their deaths to a fake medical condition they call "excited delirium" that was invented by taser companies to absolve themselves of liability?
mxburbank.bsky.social
When do you have to get circumcised for it to be "early"?
mxburbank.bsky.social
It's not (at least as of yesterday) in the NYT or WAPO or CNN, unless Goggle has fucked with their search and made it so nothing about it comes up when you search for it. There is ZERO functional, uncorrupted traditional media left in this country.
mxburbank.bsky.social
What poor staffer is Jesse Waters going to make take the fall for this? And does he realize that in order to blame someone else, Waters will have to admit that he interviewed the same guy multiple times and thought he was multiple different people. It's the classic "I'm a fucking moron" defense.
mxburbank.bsky.social
Golly, there goes that Nobel Peace Prize Trump locked down.
mxburbank.bsky.social
John Mitchell went to jail for his "work" as Nixon's AG, and Pam Bondi makes Mitchell look like Mister frikkin' Rogers.
Reposted by Max Burbank
celiebug.bsky.social
Release the Epstein files