Real Donnie Baseball
@realdonniebball.bsky.social
I could shoot my team's closer with two outs and the bases loaded in a World Series Game Seven and my fans would still love me.
You're welcome, ladies
December 11, 2025 at 12:27 AM
You're welcome, ladies
Remind me why we all moved over here from X? For a slightly different but still woke sans serif typeface? So depressing.
December 11, 2025 at 12:07 AM
Remind me why we all moved over here from X? For a slightly different but still woke sans serif typeface? So depressing.
I know what you're thinking. But unlike Minnesota's "Somalians," Stephen Miller's ancestors came from an extremely successful and exclusive Belarusian shtetl.
December 9, 2025 at 9:40 PM
I know what you're thinking. But unlike Minnesota's "Somalians," Stephen Miller's ancestors came from an extremely successful and exclusive Belarusian shtetl.
Mamdani's New York. It's already started.
December 9, 2025 at 5:51 PM
Mamdani's New York. It's already started.
"Nine months later, God became man when Mary gave birth to a son, Jesus." He would have become man at the moment of conception but this was like 4 or 5 BC; Kavanaugh, Gorsuch, and Barrett hadn't been confirmed yet.
December 9, 2025 at 3:20 AM
"Nine months later, God became man when Mary gave birth to a son, Jesus." He would have become man at the moment of conception but this was like 4 or 5 BC; Kavanaugh, Gorsuch, and Barrett hadn't been confirmed yet.
Meh. Drawing and quartering is masculine. Breaking on the wheel is masculine. Boiling people to death is masculine. Hanging? Not so much, really.
December 8, 2025 at 1:29 PM
Meh. Drawing and quartering is masculine. Breaking on the wheel is masculine. Boiling people to death is masculine. Hanging? Not so much, really.
My friends on the Cement and Concrete Workers District Council like Rao's. So I like Rao's. That's just how it is. Business.
December 8, 2025 at 12:56 AM
My friends on the Cement and Concrete Workers District Council like Rao's. So I like Rao's. That's just how it is. Business.
You're probably thinking "Is that hair real? Whose hair looks like that?" But I know the man and I can tell you with absolute certainty that it really is his hair and he doesn't color it or anything. What? No, I'm talking about Gene Simmons. Don't be an idiot.
www.irishstar.com/culture/ente...
www.irishstar.com/culture/ente...
KISS's Gene Simmons honored by Trump after being dragged out of White House
President Donald Trump hosted the 2025 Kennedy Center honorees, including KISS's Gene Simmons, in the White House's Oval Office for what was called a medal presentation ceremony
www.irishstar.com
December 7, 2025 at 2:18 PM
You're probably thinking "Is that hair real? Whose hair looks like that?" But I know the man and I can tell you with absolute certainty that it really is his hair and he doesn't color it or anything. What? No, I'm talking about Gene Simmons. Don't be an idiot.
www.irishstar.com/culture/ente...
www.irishstar.com/culture/ente...
Prestigious? It's a completely fake "Victorian" hotel built in 2010. Real Donnie House®, on the other hand, is a completely genuine, much newer, exact recreation of Hadrian's Villa. But 60 stories tall. With a casino. And pole dancing. 𝘙𝘦𝘢𝘭 prestigiositude. Call me, Taylor.
December 7, 2025 at 3:54 AM
Prestigious? It's a completely fake "Victorian" hotel built in 2010. Real Donnie House®, on the other hand, is a completely genuine, much newer, exact recreation of Hadrian's Villa. But 60 stories tall. With a casino. And pole dancing. 𝘙𝘦𝘢𝘭 prestigiositude. Call me, Taylor.
Google News thought I'd like to read an essay about how "we" on the Left should write detective novels with explicitly "Marxist aesthetics." Google News is weird.
December 7, 2025 at 12:22 AM
Google News thought I'd like to read an essay about how "we" on the Left should write detective novels with explicitly "Marxist aesthetics." Google News is weird.
Atrazine in the water. Watch your back, Michigan J. Frog.
December 6, 2025 at 12:49 AM
Atrazine in the water. Watch your back, Michigan J. Frog.
In the laws of war, the French phrase for a Venezuelan guy who probably isn't trafficking fentanyl to the United States but we've vaporized his boat anyway and now he's clinging for his life to a toilet seat in a shark-infested but otherwise empty sea is "whore of combat."
December 4, 2025 at 12:29 PM
In the laws of war, the French phrase for a Venezuelan guy who probably isn't trafficking fentanyl to the United States but we've vaporized his boat anyway and now he's clinging for his life to a toilet seat in a shark-infested but otherwise empty sea is "whore of combat."
No, it's not okay. This has become a regular thing. Ask Bullwinkle. He'll tell you.
www.nytimes.com/2025/12/03/u...
www.nytimes.com/2025/12/03/u...
A Drunk Raccoon Passed Out in the Bathroom of a Virginia Liquor Store
www.nytimes.com
December 4, 2025 at 2:30 AM
No, it's not okay. This has become a regular thing. Ask Bullwinkle. He'll tell you.
www.nytimes.com/2025/12/03/u...
www.nytimes.com/2025/12/03/u...
Why can't I get people like this in the Real Donnie Stadium® press box?
December 4, 2025 at 1:39 AM
Why can't I get people like this in the Real Donnie Stadium® press box?
Don't tell Mrs. Baseball. I want it to be a surprise.
December 3, 2025 at 4:33 PM
Don't tell Mrs. Baseball. I want it to be a surprise.
Third prize: Four free tickets to see Styx and Chicago. Second prize: Two free tickets to see Styx and Chicago. First prize: You get to stay home.
parade.com/news/two-cha...
parade.com/news/two-cha...
Two Chart-Topping '70s Rock Bands Are Touring Together for the First Time Ever
This collab was meant to be.
parade.com
December 2, 2025 at 11:44 PM
Third prize: Four free tickets to see Styx and Chicago. Second prize: Two free tickets to see Styx and Chicago. First prize: You get to stay home.
parade.com/news/two-cha...
parade.com/news/two-cha...
I think she must have read over the finished manuscript and decided "this isn't quite so embarrassing as I'd hoped." And that's when she came up with American Canto as the title.
December 2, 2025 at 10:05 PM
I think she must have read over the finished manuscript and decided "this isn't quite so embarrassing as I'd hoped." And that's when she came up with American Canto as the title.
I was promised no federal tax on the first $25,000 of voluntary cash or charged tips. I don't remember President Trump or Speaker Johnson ever saying "Except for the tips you get through your OnlyFans account, Mr. Baseball." This is not what I voted for, goddammit!
www.nytimes.com/2025/12/01/u...
www.nytimes.com/2025/12/01/u...
For ‘No Tax on Tips,’ the I.R.S. Gets Intimate
www.nytimes.com
December 2, 2025 at 9:54 PM
I was promised no federal tax on the first $25,000 of voluntary cash or charged tips. I don't remember President Trump or Speaker Johnson ever saying "Except for the tips you get through your OnlyFans account, Mr. Baseball." This is not what I voted for, goddammit!
www.nytimes.com/2025/12/01/u...
www.nytimes.com/2025/12/01/u...
If you do the math this means the present value of each current homeless person's entire future life is approximately $400.
December 2, 2025 at 2:20 AM
If you do the math this means the present value of each current homeless person's entire future life is approximately $400.
Cmon. The "anxiety and trauma" of a $500 million winery battle against Brad Pitt is just weakness leaving the body. Any sadistic high school gym teacher will tell you that.
radaronline.com/p/angelina-j...
radaronline.com/p/angelina-j...
EXCLUSIVE: Angelina Jolie Left 'Mentally Drained' by Brutal $500M Winery Battle Against Brad Pitt — With the Actor and His Legal Team 'Out for Blood'
Angelina Jolie has been left 'mentally drained' by her $500M winery battle with Brad Pitt and his legal team.
radaronline.com
December 1, 2025 at 3:26 AM
Cmon. The "anxiety and trauma" of a $500 million winery battle against Brad Pitt is just weakness leaving the body. Any sadistic high school gym teacher will tell you that.
radaronline.com/p/angelina-j...
radaronline.com/p/angelina-j...
Fact check: True. I myself am a Boomer parent. And for sure it's my unfamiliarity with Noam Chomsky Thought that's made me especially vulnerable to state media fictions about stuff like the so-called Khmer Rouge genocide and the "anti-Semitism" of Holocaust deniers.
vegoutmag.com/lifestyle/s-...
vegoutmag.com/lifestyle/s-...
I finally understand why my Boomer parents believe everything on the news—they've never heard of these Noam Chomsky ideas
Growing up means understanding Boomers aren't just stubborn. They're products of a completely different information ecosystem.
vegoutmag.com
November 30, 2025 at 5:14 PM
Fact check: True. I myself am a Boomer parent. And for sure it's my unfamiliarity with Noam Chomsky Thought that's made me especially vulnerable to state media fictions about stuff like the so-called Khmer Rouge genocide and the "anti-Semitism" of Holocaust deniers.
vegoutmag.com/lifestyle/s-...
vegoutmag.com/lifestyle/s-...
$40 million from Amazon/MGM in a deal arranged after the 2024 election. Which reminds me: What about that Mrs. Baseball documentary we discussed, Jeff? I can sell my team merchandise on Temu, you know that, right?
November 29, 2025 at 2:03 PM
$40 million from Amazon/MGM in a deal arranged after the 2024 election. Which reminds me: What about that Mrs. Baseball documentary we discussed, Jeff? I can sell my team merchandise on Temu, you know that, right?
I walked in on her naked backstage. This was before she announced she was gay. But I knew anyway. 'Cause when I told her she had a nice ass and maybe she'd like to come up to my room, she said "fuck off, you disgusting, creepy old man." Only a lesbian would say that.
www.cnn.com/2025/11/28/s...
www.cnn.com/2025/11/28/s...
A national beauty pageant got its first out lesbian winner | CNN
Grace Richardson, a 20-year-old musical theater student, has become the first-ever out lesbian winner of the Miss England beauty pageant.
www.cnn.com
November 29, 2025 at 11:51 AM
I walked in on her naked backstage. This was before she announced she was gay. But I knew anyway. 'Cause when I told her she had a nice ass and maybe she'd like to come up to my room, she said "fuck off, you disgusting, creepy old man." Only a lesbian would say that.
www.cnn.com/2025/11/28/s...
www.cnn.com/2025/11/28/s...