@heldermira.bsky.social happy birthday!
a man holding a saxophone is talking to another man
ALT: a man holding a saxophone is talking to another man
media.tenor.com
January 23, 2026 at 3:45 PM
@heldermira.bsky.social happy birthday!
Poopin’ Cosmonaut was the theme of my senior prom
i am shopping for a new cat litter box and i need to share with y'all this lil poopin' cosmonaut preparing to boldly go
January 16, 2026 at 12:23 AM
Poopin’ Cosmonaut was the theme of my senior prom
Reposted
This morning, I started up my computer, and Microsoft Edge filled the screen with this message:
LET'S RELIVE WHAT MADE 2025 SO SPECIAL!
Dear Microsoft Edge, please let's not.
LET'S RELIVE WHAT MADE 2025 SO SPECIAL!
Dear Microsoft Edge, please let's not.
January 14, 2026 at 11:48 AM
This morning, I started up my computer, and Microsoft Edge filled the screen with this message:
LET'S RELIVE WHAT MADE 2025 SO SPECIAL!
Dear Microsoft Edge, please let's not.
LET'S RELIVE WHAT MADE 2025 SO SPECIAL!
Dear Microsoft Edge, please let's not.
Pretty wild that I’d need to add a kilt to my normal outfit in certain areas of Scotland.
January 14, 2026 at 1:03 PM
Pretty wild that I’d need to add a kilt to my normal outfit in certain areas of Scotland.
My favorite part about Wordle on the Times website is the part where it insults you.
“You solved the puzzle in two steps, but your second guess was expected to leave 1.8 possible solutions as opposed to my guess which would have left 1.2. I therefore award the correct guess a 68/100, moron.”
“You solved the puzzle in two steps, but your second guess was expected to leave 1.8 possible solutions as opposed to my guess which would have left 1.2. I therefore award the correct guess a 68/100, moron.”
January 13, 2026 at 2:04 PM
My favorite part about Wordle on the Times website is the part where it insults you.
“You solved the puzzle in two steps, but your second guess was expected to leave 1.8 possible solutions as opposed to my guess which would have left 1.2. I therefore award the correct guess a 68/100, moron.”
“You solved the puzzle in two steps, but your second guess was expected to leave 1.8 possible solutions as opposed to my guess which would have left 1.2. I therefore award the correct guess a 68/100, moron.”
I should buy a tuba
a cat is sitting at a table reading a newspaper and drinking coffee
ALT: a cat is sitting at a table reading a newspaper and drinking coffee
media.tenor.com
January 12, 2026 at 8:20 PM
I should buy a tuba
I want to play the "What almost killed you" game, but I don't feel like any of my encounters were close enough. Sure I've flipped over a car, a riding lawnmower, a sailboat, several bikes, and have had plenty of other close calls - but nothing that required medical attention...
January 2, 2026 at 1:22 PM
I want to play the "What almost killed you" game, but I don't feel like any of my encounters were close enough. Sure I've flipped over a car, a riding lawnmower, a sailboat, several bikes, and have had plenty of other close calls - but nothing that required medical attention...
Reposted
Annoying that the plural of oaf is oafs and not oaves.
December 29, 2025 at 11:29 PM
Annoying that the plural of oaf is oafs and not oaves.
I’m not sure what game Dock’s is inventing but it has my interest.
December 6, 2025 at 2:20 PM
I’m not sure what game Dock’s is inventing but it has my interest.
Potatoes are unpleasant but they can at least be improved upon by frying them or slathering them in some form of meat sauce. The same cannot be said for sweet potatoes which are unpleasant no matter what is done to them.
November 28, 2025 at 10:57 PM
Potatoes are unpleasant but they can at least be improved upon by frying them or slathering them in some form of meat sauce. The same cannot be said for sweet potatoes which are unpleasant no matter what is done to them.
Pizza is pie.
November 26, 2025 at 1:16 AM
Pizza is pie.
Buckaroo Bonzai Against The World Crime League
If you were a despotic president, what movie would you force Hollywood to make? I want to see Quentin's Star Trek movie or maybe Kill Bill Vol 3.
November 25, 2025 at 8:56 PM
Buckaroo Bonzai Against The World Crime League
Pharma: These are the nighttime cold pills. You take them once before going to bed.
Me: Makes sense.
Pharma: These are the daytime cold pills. You take them a few times during the day.
Me: Got it.
Pharma: We give you the same amount of each in a box.
Me: Wait…
Me: Makes sense.
Pharma: These are the daytime cold pills. You take them a few times during the day.
Me: Got it.
Pharma: We give you the same amount of each in a box.
Me: Wait…
November 24, 2025 at 12:36 AM
Pharma: These are the nighttime cold pills. You take them once before going to bed.
Me: Makes sense.
Pharma: These are the daytime cold pills. You take them a few times during the day.
Me: Got it.
Pharma: We give you the same amount of each in a box.
Me: Wait…
Me: Makes sense.
Pharma: These are the daytime cold pills. You take them a few times during the day.
Me: Got it.
Pharma: We give you the same amount of each in a box.
Me: Wait…
USMNT has to do with soccer/football and has nothing to do with mutants, ninjas, or turtles.
November 17, 2025 at 1:18 PM
USMNT has to do with soccer/football and has nothing to do with mutants, ninjas, or turtles.
Flu vaccine clinics at work are good. Clinics where you can check off boxes to get additional shots at the same time; extra good. Being sleepy from vaccines on work time instead of free time; double plus good.
November 5, 2025 at 5:02 PM
Flu vaccine clinics at work are good. Clinics where you can check off boxes to get additional shots at the same time; extra good. Being sleepy from vaccines on work time instead of free time; double plus good.
Will Bored Ape NFTs increase in value due to plague monkey release, or will they further devalue out of fear of monkey herpes?
October 29, 2025 at 5:39 PM
Will Bored Ape NFTs increase in value due to plague monkey release, or will they further devalue out of fear of monkey herpes?
Be Not Afraid
b̶̗̠̤̙̺̰̙͇͆̀̒̍̀̂́̕ả̶̡̛̛̛̛͎͔̟̯̤͑̈͐̌̈́̄̓͆̓͛̎͌͛͋͑̆̇̄͐͋̋͊̓̋̊͐̍͗̓͒̆̊̓̂͆̀̾̇̑̈́́͊̾̚͘͘̚̕͝͝͠s̷̢̢̢̧̡̝͖̮͉̰̯̫̮̪̳̲͕̯̟͉̮͚̙͚͓͕̫̣̦͔͓̺̫̻̤̲͆͒̾͂͌̐̑͊̈́͒͛̆̊̍̌͛̇̇̍̾͗̎͐͑̆͒̓̀́̏͊̓̈́͋̓̐͂͘͜͝͝͠͝͝e̴̡̡̡̘̲̺̥͎̥̭͙̲̪̱͔̞͔̠͖̞̞̦̱͉̤̭̼̗͖̥͕͕͙̦̹̠͙͓̤̰͎̼̱̪̹͉̱̞͉̯̠̜͎͙̗͖̣͒̊̒̌͒͗̓̀͗͒͐̽̈̔̑̆͑͑̆̀̀̒̉̿̕̕͜͜͜ͅͅb̷̧̡̪̺̯̱͍͚̻͕̗̬͓̞̈́̈́̽̋̑̈́͒̓́̒̓̇̀̾̕͝a̶̧̢̦͕̗͔͓͙̦̜̬̯̟͉̪̱̮̲͍̻̹͓͍̪̦̥͎̩̫͉͈͙̰̹̞̯̭͔̩̹͛̅͗̑̂̋̍͌͒́̈̆̚͜ͅͅḻ̵̢̢̧̢̨̧̟̗̖̰͇̦̺͕̫̖͈͎͈̪̺̗͚̖̱͎̞͚̥͇̺̱̜͛̃̀̂̾̆̈͝ͅļ̴̧̨̬͔̱͎̳̬͉̘̝̻̹͔͓͍͈̙̣̳̝̗͙͉̬̭̦̗̥̜̠̘̯̯͖̜̠̦̱̰̱̮̤̣̥̼̯̞̉
October 28, 2025 at 1:10 PM
Be Not Afraid
Me: Ahh, a restful day where I don’t have to bike to work.
Exercise App: Hope you like squats, bitch.
Exercise App: Hope you like squats, bitch.
October 9, 2025 at 5:45 PM
Me: Ahh, a restful day where I don’t have to bike to work.
Exercise App: Hope you like squats, bitch.
Exercise App: Hope you like squats, bitch.
Being knocked unconscious and violated with probes may be the most I have ever done to skip out on a day of work.
September 24, 2025 at 12:29 PM
Being knocked unconscious and violated with probes may be the most I have ever done to skip out on a day of work.
Ah, and the first email about a student being hit by a car comes through. Awesome.
September 9, 2025 at 7:29 PM
Ah, and the first email about a student being hit by a car comes through. Awesome.
I want today to end but I don’t want tomorrow to begin and I can’t reconcile these thoughts
September 7, 2025 at 8:56 PM
I want today to end but I don’t want tomorrow to begin and I can’t reconcile these thoughts
Oh dear, voir dire
September 5, 2025 at 3:18 PM
Oh dear, voir dire
They Are Giants
Foo Destroyers
i am done slightly diminishing bands. we must increase bands. the mountain range goats
August 14, 2025 at 1:48 PM
They Are Giants
Reposted
Ladies and gentlemen, an announcement…
August 10, 2025 at 6:22 PM
Ladies and gentlemen, an announcement…