Rick Gualtieri
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rickgualtieri.com
Rick Gualtieri
@rickgualtieri.com
Horror & Comedy Author, here to offer a temporary escape from all of life's BS. Fan of cryptids, Transformers, & Godzilla.

He/Him.
Check out my books at: https://rickgualtieri.com/links/
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What happens when a foul-mouthed gamer is mistakenly recruited into the ranks of the undead?

All hell breaks loose, duh!

The Tome of Bill horror comedy series, starting with BILL THE VAMPIRE.

There are reasons we fear the night. He's NOT one of them.

www.amazon.com/dp/B0058I8A6K #books
Get ready to die laughing!

BILL THE VAMPIRE - There are reasons we fear the night. He's NOT one of them.

For ebook, print, and audio.

www.amazon.com/dp/B0058I8A6K
November 27, 2025 at 4:01 AM
Back at JFK. Goddamn this airport is a rat maze.
November 27, 2025 at 12:35 AM
Me: "I have ten pages left in this edit. Can you let me finish?"

The cat:
November 26, 2025 at 3:32 PM
If you're in NJ and driving in the left lane 1 MPH faster than the slow car in the middle, just know that everyone hates you.
November 26, 2025 at 2:55 PM
Don't sleep with the lights on!
That just makes it easier for the monsters to find you.

BIGFOOT HUNTERS - Tales of the Crypto-Hunter book 1.

A cryptid thriller for ebook, print, and audio.

www.amazon.com/dp/B0074VTEPA
November 26, 2025 at 4:31 AM
2 paragraphs away from the end of this chapter, but no, Falkor decided it was dinner time … and he was going to grumble behind my chair until I got the hint.
November 25, 2025 at 9:50 PM
Lap goblin says “No editing for you, author monkey!”
November 25, 2025 at 6:54 PM
Holy crap. It used to be so easy to contact someone at Amazon. Now it's a mess of links, dead end help pages, and AI chat that tries to do everything to keep you from talking to an actual person.
November 25, 2025 at 5:40 PM
I honestly don’t get why mobile game companies are so addicted to selling a lie, especially when the game itself is fine.

But they’d rather sell something that doesn’t exist, rather than actually build the game they’re showing in the ads.
November 25, 2025 at 11:34 AM
“What are you?”
“Nothing you’ve ever seen before. I’m a whole lot of badass in a pretty little package.”

Tamara Bentley is ... THE GIRL WHO PUNCHES WEREWOLVES

For ebook, print, and audio.

www.amazon.com/dp/B07DBT1JH1
November 25, 2025 at 3:39 AM
Saw a laptop upgrade on Amazon yesterday that was everything I wanted and at a good sale price, also knowing that with tariffs it might not be that price again anytime soon.

But I also have zero interest in fueling anything Black Friday related this year.

Not today, Satan.
November 24, 2025 at 10:47 AM
Get ready to laugh from DUSK TILL DAWN!

BILL THE VAMPIRE - There are reasons we fear the night. He's NOT one of them.

For ebook, print, and audio.

www.amazon.com/dp/B0058I8A6K
November 24, 2025 at 4:30 AM
AI Bros lining up to outsource their lack of imagination.
November 23, 2025 at 6:28 PM
When doing a cover rebrand, be prepared authors.

Doesn't matter if the old is a stick figure crayon drawing and the new a Rembrandt by comparison, there will always be someone who says, "I prefer the original." 😂
November 23, 2025 at 2:50 PM
Ready for a terrifying Bigfoot thriller?

BIGFOOT HUNTERS - Tales of the Crypto-Hunter book 1.
A cryptid thriller for ebook, print, and audio.

www.amazon.com/dp/B0074VTEPA
November 23, 2025 at 3:45 AM
I hate when movies are so dark that I have to question whether my TV is starting to go.
November 23, 2025 at 12:42 AM
They were holding a food drive outside the local ShopRite today. Went inside with my autistic son because he wanted a bottle of Gatorade but had him drop off a frozen ham with them on the way out. I then explained that he'd just made someone's holiday a bit better which made him seriously happy.
November 22, 2025 at 6:52 PM
Pet Peeve: when the box includes an extra widget that isn't mentioned in the instruction manual at all.
November 22, 2025 at 6:43 PM
It's nice to see that in the months since I've had to do a Mail Merge in Word, Microsoft has somehow managed to make it that much worse.
November 22, 2025 at 5:38 PM
Looking like a rainy Saturday here in NJ. Huh, you’d almost think I’d been planning to mow the lawn.
November 22, 2025 at 11:30 AM
Get ready to die laughing!

BILL THE VAMPIRE - There are reasons we fear the night. He's NOT one of them.

For ebook, print, and audio.

www.amazon.com/dp/B0058I8A6K
November 22, 2025 at 3:29 AM
Zohran Mamdani is almost certainly going to be outnumbered at his White House meeting today, but he very much won't be outclassed.
November 21, 2025 at 5:20 PM
“What are you?”
“Nothing you’ve ever seen before. I’m a whole lot of badass in a pretty little package.”

Tamara Bentley is ... THE GIRL WHO PUNCHES WEREWOLVES

For ebook, print, and audio.

www.amazon.com/dp/B07DBT1JH1
November 21, 2025 at 4:29 AM
Don't sleep with the lights on!
That just makes it easier for the monsters to find you.

BIGFOOT HUNTERS - Tales of the Crypto-Hunter book 1.

A cryptid thriller for ebook, print, and audio.

www.amazon.com/dp/B0074VTEPA
November 20, 2025 at 4:22 AM
Got back from JFK airport a little while ago, always a good reminder about why I freaking hate driving in New York.
November 20, 2025 at 2:43 AM