Ryan, Perdido en TX
@ryanlostintx.bsky.social
I’m just happy to be here.
Pinned
When you spend 30 minutes looking at the menu and finally agree to split the combo fajitas dinner for two.
I hate being from Houston.
January 18, 2026 at 11:17 PM
I hate being from Houston.
The Patriots are giving the ball back to the Texans because they think the Texans offense can’t do shit to them and they may be correct.
January 18, 2026 at 10:22 PM
The Patriots are giving the ball back to the Texans because they think the Texans offense can’t do shit to them and they may be correct.
If the Texans pull this one out the calls for a QB to be benched before the Conference Championship game are going to be absolutely numerous and correct and amazing.
January 18, 2026 at 9:55 PM
If the Texans pull this one out the calls for a QB to be benched before the Conference Championship game are going to be absolutely numerous and correct and amazing.
Bring in Mills plz.
January 18, 2026 at 9:35 PM
Bring in Mills plz.
You’ve gotta be on crack if you think the Houston Texans can come back and win this game.
Me:
Me:
January 18, 2026 at 9:31 PM
You’ve gotta be on crack if you think the Houston Texans can come back and win this game.
Me:
Me:
Put in Davis Mills.
January 18, 2026 at 9:04 PM
Put in Davis Mills.
This is the most nervous I’ve been for an NFL game that I can remember. Go Texans.
January 18, 2026 at 7:33 PM
This is the most nervous I’ve been for an NFL game that I can remember. Go Texans.
I think the Astros should cheat their asses off this season. Just lean into it and cheat like nobody has ever cheated before.
January 16, 2026 at 5:25 PM
I think the Astros should cheat their asses off this season. Just lean into it and cheat like nobody has ever cheated before.
Texans keys for the game this Sunday:
January 16, 2026 at 4:01 PM
Texans keys for the game this Sunday:
3:47am piss drunk in front of an open fridge just housing the leftovers my wife specifically told me were for her lunch the following day.
January 16, 2026 at 3:57 PM
3:47am piss drunk in front of an open fridge just housing the leftovers my wife specifically told me were for her lunch the following day.
Need the New England Patriots to suffer the slings and arrows of outrageous fortune.
January 16, 2026 at 3:54 PM
Need the New England Patriots to suffer the slings and arrows of outrageous fortune.
Went from Kyle Tucker motherfucker to
MOTHERFUCKER Kyle Tucker lmao.
MOTHERFUCKER Kyle Tucker lmao.
January 16, 2026 at 3:03 AM
Went from Kyle Tucker motherfucker to
MOTHERFUCKER Kyle Tucker lmao.
MOTHERFUCKER Kyle Tucker lmao.
I’ve had zero allergies that I’ve known of my entire life up until the last few years and then WHAM cedar pollen hit me like a ton of fucking bricks WTF MAN.
January 16, 2026 at 1:02 AM
I’ve had zero allergies that I’ve known of my entire life up until the last few years and then WHAM cedar pollen hit me like a ton of fucking bricks WTF MAN.
Reposted by Ryan, Perdido en TX
Well call me Fortunato because I need someone to give me a good bottle of wine and wall me up in a quiet, dark basement please
January 14, 2026 at 11:51 PM
Well call me Fortunato because I need someone to give me a good bottle of wine and wall me up in a quiet, dark basement please
I have acquired what I believe to be a rare cask of vintage amontillado. I have it conveniently stored in the catacombs beneath my palazzo. Would you be so kind as to come help me authenticate it?
Well call me Fortunato because I need someone to give me a good bottle of wine and wall me up in a quiet, dark basement please
January 15, 2026 at 12:19 AM
I have acquired what I believe to be a rare cask of vintage amontillado. I have it conveniently stored in the catacombs beneath my palazzo. Would you be so kind as to come help me authenticate it?
Sarah got me some socks from her trip to the San Diego Zoo. Pretty sweet tbqh.
January 14, 2026 at 11:48 PM
Sarah got me some socks from her trip to the San Diego Zoo. Pretty sweet tbqh.
Last night if Sarah being out of town. I fried up a chicken breast and made some sandwiches.
January 14, 2026 at 12:59 AM
Last night if Sarah being out of town. I fried up a chicken breast and made some sandwiches.
Do the Houston Texans have a generationally nasty defense? My sources point to yes. Can they ride that to a Super Bowl? Maybe?!? Need their QB to not suck.
January 13, 2026 at 8:59 PM
Do the Houston Texans have a generationally nasty defense? My sources point to yes. Can they ride that to a Super Bowl? Maybe?!? Need their QB to not suck.
The Texans have ended Mike Tomlin’s tenure as Steelers head coach. Wild times.
January 13, 2026 at 7:11 PM
The Texans have ended Mike Tomlin’s tenure as Steelers head coach. Wild times.
Reposted by Ryan, Perdido en TX
The Houston Texans reversed a lot of history in spite of shitty QB play. Ending a streak of MNF home games won by the Steelers, the streak of road playoff games lost by the Texans. What a night.
January 13, 2026 at 4:02 AM
The Houston Texans reversed a lot of history in spite of shitty QB play. Ending a streak of MNF home games won by the Steelers, the streak of road playoff games lost by the Texans. What a night.
The Houston Texans reversed a lot of history in spite of shitty QB play. Ending a streak of MNF home games won by the Steelers, the streak of road playoff games lost by the Texans. What a night.
January 13, 2026 at 4:02 AM
The Houston Texans reversed a lot of history in spite of shitty QB play. Ending a streak of MNF home games won by the Steelers, the streak of road playoff games lost by the Texans. What a night.
SSSWWWAAARRRMMM.
January 13, 2026 at 3:42 AM
SSSWWWAAARRRMMM.
Here comes the real MVP. FAIRBAIRN.
January 13, 2026 at 3:36 AM
Here comes the real MVP. FAIRBAIRN.
LIKE DO THAT THROW EVERY TIME.
January 13, 2026 at 3:30 AM
LIKE DO THAT THROW EVERY TIME.