Johan Ludvig Brattås
@sqlclause.no
Just this guy, you know? (He/Him)
Oh, and a Microsoft Data Platform MVP
Oh, and a Microsoft Data Platform MVP
We have inherited a project with a database where the devs have a) a fondness for SELECT * FROM where they actually just want a single value returned and b) create views that only renames a column
a cartoon of alice from alice in wonderland looking down
Alt: a cartoon of alice from alice in wonderland looking down
media.tenor.com
December 19, 2025 at 8:48 AM
We have inherited a project with a database where the devs have a) a fondness for SELECT * FROM where they actually just want a single value returned and b) create views that only renames a column
Greetings! Do you have a minute to hear about our lord and saviour the Mozzarella cheese?
December 18, 2025 at 6:20 PM
Greetings! Do you have a minute to hear about our lord and saviour the Mozzarella cheese?
Reposted by Johan Ludvig Brattås
Leder i Fellesforbundet avd 250, Børge Ånesen, med kraftig oppgjør.
Det var hardtarbeidende Marita (35) som ble drept. Fordi hun avviste en gjest. En stalker.
www.adressa.no/nyheter/tron...
Det var hardtarbeidende Marita (35) som ble drept. Fordi hun avviste en gjest. En stalker.
www.adressa.no/nyheter/tron...
December 17, 2025 at 5:19 PM
Leder i Fellesforbundet avd 250, Børge Ånesen, med kraftig oppgjør.
Det var hardtarbeidende Marita (35) som ble drept. Fordi hun avviste en gjest. En stalker.
www.adressa.no/nyheter/tron...
Det var hardtarbeidende Marita (35) som ble drept. Fordi hun avviste en gjest. En stalker.
www.adressa.no/nyheter/tron...
Now live on Fabric Explorers Norway - a session about Fabric Cost Analysis.
Want to join?
Want to join?
December 17, 2025 at 5:13 PM
Now live on Fabric Explorers Norway - a session about Fabric Cost Analysis.
Want to join?
Want to join?
Reposted by Johan Ludvig Brattås
I don’t understand how anyone chooses flour over corn tortillas. I really don’t.
December 16, 2025 at 8:20 PM
I don’t understand how anyone chooses flour over corn tortillas. I really don’t.
Reposted by Johan Ludvig Brattås
Kjæresterelasjon avkreftes av flere. Det har et annet navn. Drapsmann er et selvfølgelig et. Det heter STALKER. BESETTELSE. Og kvinnelige bartendere er sterkt utsatt for dette. Menn som ikke takler å bli avvist. Menn som tror at kvinnekroppen bare kan tas. At bartenderen kan eies.
December 15, 2025 at 1:30 PM
Kjæresterelasjon avkreftes av flere. Det har et annet navn. Drapsmann er et selvfølgelig et. Det heter STALKER. BESETTELSE. Og kvinnelige bartendere er sterkt utsatt for dette. Menn som ikke takler å bli avvist. Menn som tror at kvinnekroppen bare kan tas. At bartenderen kan eies.
Reposted by Johan Ludvig Brattås
I was just saved by the @callfordataspeakers.com procrastinator's digest, a weekly email that reminds you of calls for speakers that are about to close in the next few days.
Including SQL Bits, in my case.
Including SQL Bits, in my case.
December 15, 2025 at 8:46 AM
I was just saved by the @callfordataspeakers.com procrastinator's digest, a weekly email that reminds you of calls for speakers that are about to close in the next few days.
Including SQL Bits, in my case.
Including SQL Bits, in my case.
Wow, mørkt glutenfritt og alkoholfritt øl fra Oslo brewing company. Ikke fantastisk men et veldig bra alkoholfritt alternativ 🤩
December 14, 2025 at 8:57 PM
Wow, mørkt glutenfritt og alkoholfritt øl fra Oslo brewing company. Ikke fantastisk men et veldig bra alkoholfritt alternativ 🤩
Happy Hanukkah to all my friends celebrating.
May you have a great holiday, even though the holiday started with a horrible tragedy in Australia.
May you have a great holiday, even though the holiday started with a horrible tragedy in Australia.
December 14, 2025 at 6:57 PM
Happy Hanukkah to all my friends celebrating.
May you have a great holiday, even though the holiday started with a horrible tragedy in Australia.
May you have a great holiday, even though the holiday started with a horrible tragedy in Australia.
We actually had some sun today, so me and the boys went for a walk in moose territory
December 14, 2025 at 1:54 PM
We actually had some sun today, so me and the boys went for a walk in moose territory
So much fun was had in the forest today that Eamon and Annan had to occupy the entire sofa for hours when we got home. #DogsOfBluesky
December 13, 2025 at 7:40 PM
So much fun was had in the forest today that Eamon and Annan had to occupy the entire sofa for hours when we got home. #DogsOfBluesky
Reposted by Johan Ludvig Brattås
Gamingaksjonen samla inn (foreløpig) over 560 000 kroner! Fantastisk resultat!
Spleisen kommer til å være åpen til julaften, så det er FREMDELES TID til å donere til Redd Barna!
spleis.no/ga
Spleisen kommer til å være åpen til julaften, så det er FREMDELES TID til å donere til Redd Barna!
spleis.no/ga
Redd barna som ikke skal hjem til jul - Gamingaksjonen 2025
Tusenvis av barn møter vinteren på flukt fra krigsherjede områder. Med din hjelp kan vi sikre at flere barn får mat, medisiner og varme klær til å overleve kulda. Sammen kan vi varme flere barn som ik...
spleis.no
December 12, 2025 at 10:05 PM
Gamingaksjonen samla inn (foreløpig) over 560 000 kroner! Fantastisk resultat!
Spleisen kommer til å være åpen til julaften, så det er FREMDELES TID til å donere til Redd Barna!
spleis.no/ga
Spleisen kommer til å være åpen til julaften, så det er FREMDELES TID til å donere til Redd Barna!
spleis.no/ga
Writing the chapter about capacity consumption in my book, and I am not drunk enough for this...
(I am completely sober, but I wish I had a beer...)
How will the reader feel when reading this I wonder.
(I am completely sober, but I wish I had a beer...)
How will the reader feel when reading this I wonder.
December 12, 2025 at 10:05 PM
Writing the chapter about capacity consumption in my book, and I am not drunk enough for this...
(I am completely sober, but I wish I had a beer...)
How will the reader feel when reading this I wonder.
(I am completely sober, but I wish I had a beer...)
How will the reader feel when reading this I wonder.
Reposted by Johan Ludvig Brattås
DATE CHANGE for Data Saturday Stockholm 2026!
Because of the Stockholm Marathon, which happens on the original date, not only were hotels exorbitantly expensive, but the venue was actually not even bookable.
New date: May 9th.
Of all the problems, it's never the stuff you'd expect. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
Because of the Stockholm Marathon, which happens on the original date, not only were hotels exorbitantly expensive, but the venue was actually not even bookable.
New date: May 9th.
Of all the problems, it's never the stuff you'd expect. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
The call for speakers for Data Saturday Stockholm 2026 is open, and we'd love to see your session abstracts!
NOTE: The date has changed to May 9th.
NOTE: The date has changed to May 9th.
Data Saturday Stockholm 2026: Call for Speakers
Data Saturday Stockholm is a free, community-led one-day conference on the Microsoft Data Platform. We'll bring local and international speakers to a ...
sessionize.com
December 12, 2025 at 7:02 PM
DATE CHANGE for Data Saturday Stockholm 2026!
Because of the Stockholm Marathon, which happens on the original date, not only were hotels exorbitantly expensive, but the venue was actually not even bookable.
New date: May 9th.
Of all the problems, it's never the stuff you'd expect. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
Because of the Stockholm Marathon, which happens on the original date, not only were hotels exorbitantly expensive, but the venue was actually not even bookable.
New date: May 9th.
Of all the problems, it's never the stuff you'd expect. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
Just finished The Spear Cuts Through Water on Audible.
Started this on my flight back from Seattle, which was a mistake. It demands more from the reader/listener than what my brain could deliver - sleep deprived and jet lagged as it was.
But it is a nice read, and worth the time.
Started this on my flight back from Seattle, which was a mistake. It demands more from the reader/listener than what my brain could deliver - sleep deprived and jet lagged as it was.
But it is a nice read, and worth the time.
December 12, 2025 at 7:54 PM
Just finished The Spear Cuts Through Water on Audible.
Started this on my flight back from Seattle, which was a mistake. It demands more from the reader/listener than what my brain could deliver - sleep deprived and jet lagged as it was.
But it is a nice read, and worth the time.
Started this on my flight back from Seattle, which was a mistake. It demands more from the reader/listener than what my brain could deliver - sleep deprived and jet lagged as it was.
But it is a nice read, and worth the time.
No rats or mice around today. But Annan discovered a small toy owl that wanted to be his friend. #DogsofBluesky
December 12, 2025 at 1:32 PM
No rats or mice around today. But Annan discovered a small toy owl that wanted to be his friend. #DogsofBluesky
4,5 kg ribbe er kokt, renset, kuttet i småbiter og krydret og satt i syltepresse.
Da satser jeg på at julepålegget er sikret i år også.
Og jeg sender en varm tanke til mormor, som nok lagde langt større porsjoner enn dette hvert år til hun var i 80-årene.
Da satser jeg på at julepålegget er sikret i år også.
Og jeg sender en varm tanke til mormor, som nok lagde langt større porsjoner enn dette hvert år til hun var i 80-årene.
December 11, 2025 at 10:56 PM
4,5 kg ribbe er kokt, renset, kuttet i småbiter og krydret og satt i syltepresse.
Da satser jeg på at julepålegget er sikret i år også.
Og jeg sender en varm tanke til mormor, som nok lagde langt større porsjoner enn dette hvert år til hun var i 80-årene.
Da satser jeg på at julepålegget er sikret i år også.
Og jeg sender en varm tanke til mormor, som nok lagde langt større porsjoner enn dette hvert år til hun var i 80-årene.
Seems Eamon and Annan have had to fight off a rat invasion in one of the dogbeds
December 11, 2025 at 4:17 PM
Seems Eamon and Annan have had to fight off a rat invasion in one of the dogbeds
Reposted by Johan Ludvig Brattås
Headlines definitely land differently if your brain is accustomed to reading AI as Artificial Insemination! e.g. www.bbc.co.uk/news/busines...
Airbnb turns to AI to help prevent house parties
The short-term rental giant is now using artificial intelligence to try to prevent troublemakers.
www.bbc.co.uk
December 11, 2025 at 2:08 PM
Headlines definitely land differently if your brain is accustomed to reading AI as Artificial Insemination! e.g. www.bbc.co.uk/news/busines...
Wishing my busdriver this morning a weekend of stepping on Lego for making sure we missed the corresponding train
December 11, 2025 at 7:22 AM
Wishing my busdriver this morning a weekend of stepping on Lego for making sure we missed the corresponding train
Whoop! Next jobb offer sent out.
Now to find a senior data engineer to complete the team.
( Not the easiest task, I know)
Now to find a senior data engineer to complete the team.
( Not the easiest task, I know)
a man in a lab coat holding a tablet with check written on it
Alt: a man in a lab coat holding a tablet with check written on it
media.tenor.com
December 9, 2025 at 9:16 AM
Whoop! Next jobb offer sent out.
Now to find a senior data engineer to complete the team.
( Not the easiest task, I know)
Now to find a senior data engineer to complete the team.
( Not the easiest task, I know)
Aaah, December. The month where it’s dark when you get up. Dark when you go to work. Dark when you leave work and dark when you go to bed.
Hello Darkness My Old Friend GIF
Alt: Hello Darkness My Old Friend GIF
media.tenor.com
December 9, 2025 at 6:58 AM
Aaah, December. The month where it’s dark when you get up. Dark when you go to work. Dark when you leave work and dark when you go to bed.
God dammit, Office! I have NOT asked you to do a CoPilot summary of the document I opened. STOP wasting resources on tasks not asked for.
December 8, 2025 at 11:40 AM
God dammit, Office! I have NOT asked you to do a CoPilot summary of the document I opened. STOP wasting resources on tasks not asked for.
Reposted by Johan Ludvig Brattås
Har kommet på den dårlige sida av internett igjen.
Hei alle sammen. Jeg gymmer litt for folkehelsa men mest som en HOBBY. Jeg lager også sykt mye mat fra scratch. Litt for økonomi og grøntinntak men mest som HOBBY.
Veldig mange mennesker har disse to hobbyene som JOBB på internett.
Hei alle sammen. Jeg gymmer litt for folkehelsa men mest som en HOBBY. Jeg lager også sykt mye mat fra scratch. Litt for økonomi og grøntinntak men mest som HOBBY.
Veldig mange mennesker har disse to hobbyene som JOBB på internett.
December 8, 2025 at 9:05 AM
Har kommet på den dårlige sida av internett igjen.
Hei alle sammen. Jeg gymmer litt for folkehelsa men mest som en HOBBY. Jeg lager også sykt mye mat fra scratch. Litt for økonomi og grøntinntak men mest som HOBBY.
Veldig mange mennesker har disse to hobbyene som JOBB på internett.
Hei alle sammen. Jeg gymmer litt for folkehelsa men mest som en HOBBY. Jeg lager også sykt mye mat fra scratch. Litt for økonomi og grøntinntak men mest som HOBBY.
Veldig mange mennesker har disse to hobbyene som JOBB på internett.