Teddypasketti
@teddypasketti.bsky.social
Federal civil servant, lawyer, no other info for you about me. My picture is not of me.
My opinions are mine own and not my employer’s. Let me underscore that: MY OPINIONS ARE MOST CERTAINLY NOT MY EMPLOYER’S.
My opinions are mine own and not my employer’s. Let me underscore that: MY OPINIONS ARE MOST CERTAINLY NOT MY EMPLOYER’S.
Another pre-Thanksgiving scene at the bar: a friend of American Indian descent (his preferred term) lectured an Italian about how tomatoes were not indigenous to Italy but came from here to the point where the Italian had to look it up and, devastated, wondered aloud what his whole life was about.
November 26, 2025 at 4:37 AM
Another pre-Thanksgiving scene at the bar: a friend of American Indian descent (his preferred term) lectured an Italian about how tomatoes were not indigenous to Italy but came from here to the point where the Italian had to look it up and, devastated, wondered aloud what his whole life was about.
Guy at bar: Who’s that actress? She’s hot. I like her hair and her hair and eye makeup, what’s it called?
Bartender: That’s called mascara.
Guy: Right! What’s her name?
Bartender: That’s Michael J. Fox playing his own daughter. Back to the Future Part 2, Dave.
Guy: That’s what Fox now?
Bartender: That’s called mascara.
Guy: Right! What’s her name?
Bartender: That’s Michael J. Fox playing his own daughter. Back to the Future Part 2, Dave.
Guy: That’s what Fox now?
November 26, 2025 at 3:11 AM
Guy at bar: Who’s that actress? She’s hot. I like her hair and her hair and eye makeup, what’s it called?
Bartender: That’s called mascara.
Guy: Right! What’s her name?
Bartender: That’s Michael J. Fox playing his own daughter. Back to the Future Part 2, Dave.
Guy: That’s what Fox now?
Bartender: That’s called mascara.
Guy: Right! What’s her name?
Bartender: That’s Michael J. Fox playing his own daughter. Back to the Future Part 2, Dave.
Guy: That’s what Fox now?
Absolutely KILLING IT in 80s trivia tonight.
November 26, 2025 at 1:55 AM
Absolutely KILLING IT in 80s trivia tonight.
My 20 year-old son very delicately educated my dad, who does not watch Fox News and instead watches the Hallmark Channel 24/7 (preferable!) “what the deal is with these Epstein files” and did so with in an informed and level manner. Again, those moments when you’ve realized your kid’s okay:
a man in a suit and tie holds a microphone and says that 's my son snl
ALT: a man in a suit and tie holds a microphone and says that 's my son snl
media.tenor.com
November 26, 2025 at 12:14 AM
My 20 year-old son very delicately educated my dad, who does not watch Fox News and instead watches the Hallmark Channel 24/7 (preferable!) “what the deal is with these Epstein files” and did so with in an informed and level manner. Again, those moments when you’ve realized your kid’s okay:
My 22 y.o. son told me that JD Vance looks like a Handmaid’s Commander trying unsuccessfully to suppress his sex fetish that’s punishable by death and I sighed because it’s nice, those moments when you know you raised ‘em right.
November 26, 2025 at 12:10 AM
My 22 y.o. son told me that JD Vance looks like a Handmaid’s Commander trying unsuccessfully to suppress his sex fetish that’s punishable by death and I sighed because it’s nice, those moments when you know you raised ‘em right.
My mother has perfected her passive-aggressive skill set.
November 25, 2025 at 1:40 AM
My mother has perfected her passive-aggressive skill set.
Reposted by Teddypasketti
If you had plans with Eagles fans family in Philadelphia on Thanksgiving, emergency shelters are being established in Bucks, Montgomery, and Chester Counties. Stay in your homes. Because of the threat to untold numbers of citizens, this radio station will remain on the air, day and night.
November 24, 2025 at 1:38 AM
If you had plans with Eagles fans family in Philadelphia on Thanksgiving, emergency shelters are being established in Bucks, Montgomery, and Chester Counties. Stay in your homes. Because of the threat to untold numbers of citizens, this radio station will remain on the air, day and night.
What is it with moms who get upset when you decline to dress your baked potato with sour cream that expired in April 2025? My mom takes it as a personal insult. Like I’m calling her a failure. You know what I’d do? I’d be like, “Oh, fuck, I’m so sorry! I should have thrown that out months ago!”
November 24, 2025 at 1:16 AM
What is it with moms who get upset when you decline to dress your baked potato with sour cream that expired in April 2025? My mom takes it as a personal insult. Like I’m calling her a failure. You know what I’d do? I’d be like, “Oh, fuck, I’m so sorry! I should have thrown that out months ago!”
Reposted by Teddypasketti
Modern Cruise Ships look extremely stupid.
November 24, 2025 at 12:06 AM
Modern Cruise Ships look extremely stupid.
A movie that takes place where you’re from.
November 23, 2025 at 8:48 PM
A movie that takes place where you’re from.
The Ravens O Line is committing felonies out here.
November 23, 2025 at 8:18 PM
The Ravens O Line is committing felonies out here.
HOW DO YOU MISS THOSE TACKLES FOR F
November 23, 2025 at 8:06 PM
HOW DO YOU MISS THOSE TACKLES FOR F
Mark Andrews, man. Come on.
November 23, 2025 at 7:59 PM
Mark Andrews, man. Come on.
I’m getting tired with this weak first quarter, second quarter, turn it on towards the half of the third quarter shit. And also Lamar looks scared, trepidatious.
November 23, 2025 at 7:46 PM
I’m getting tired with this weak first quarter, second quarter, turn it on towards the half of the third quarter shit. And also Lamar looks scared, trepidatious.
The Lamar Jackson last year would have gone for it. He’s still hurt.
November 23, 2025 at 7:12 PM
The Lamar Jackson last year would have gone for it. He’s still hurt.
What the fuck, Ravens? What the actual fuck?
November 23, 2025 at 6:59 PM
What the fuck, Ravens? What the actual fuck?
This is incorrect. Carpenter’s The Thing (1982) more closely follows Who Goes There. Set in Antarctica, shapeshifting alien, turns into dogs, characters names are identical or similar.
Let's talk about my favorite 'remake', The Thing (1982).
Haunting, horrifying, powerful. From cult classic to true modern classic, one of the scariest movies ever made.
Then there is The Thing from Another World (1951), which more closely follows the story 'Who Goes There?'
Who's seen them either?
Haunting, horrifying, powerful. From cult classic to true modern classic, one of the scariest movies ever made.
Then there is The Thing from Another World (1951), which more closely follows the story 'Who Goes There?'
Who's seen them either?
November 23, 2025 at 6:55 PM
This is incorrect. Carpenter’s The Thing (1982) more closely follows Who Goes There. Set in Antarctica, shapeshifting alien, turns into dogs, characters names are identical or similar.
It’s the fucking Jets, guys. If you’re gonna burn a timeout early in the first quarter, make it worth at least 3 points for the love of fuck.
November 23, 2025 at 6:15 PM
It’s the fucking Jets, guys. If you’re gonna burn a timeout early in the first quarter, make it worth at least 3 points for the love of fuck.
Another downside to my parents living in NC, the AFC game today at 1 is Steelers versus Bears. Good game, but not what I want.
November 23, 2025 at 4:57 PM
Another downside to my parents living in NC, the AFC game today at 1 is Steelers versus Bears. Good game, but not what I want.
Reposted by Teddypasketti
me, certified normie, talking to my goth best friend of almost 2 decades educating me on stoner metal in our kitchen at 10:45 on a saturday night
jamie: the vocals don't kick in for 20 minutes
me:
jamie: it's an hour long song
me: what
jamie:
jamie: the vocals don't kick in for 20 minutes
me:
jamie: it's an hour long song
me: what
jamie:
a man with a mustache is making a silly face
ALT: a man with a mustache is making a silly face
media.tenor.com
November 23, 2025 at 3:45 AM
me, certified normie, talking to my goth best friend of almost 2 decades educating me on stoner metal in our kitchen at 10:45 on a saturday night
jamie: the vocals don't kick in for 20 minutes
me:
jamie: it's an hour long song
me: what
jamie:
jamie: the vocals don't kick in for 20 minutes
me:
jamie: it's an hour long song
me: what
jamie:
She came from Greece she had a thirst for knowledge
She studied sculpture at Saint Martin's College
That's where I
Caught her eye
She told me that her dad was loaded
I said, that case I'll have rum and Coca-Cola
She said fine
And then in thirty seconds time she said
I wanna live like common people
She studied sculpture at Saint Martin's College
That's where I
Caught her eye
She told me that her dad was loaded
I said, that case I'll have rum and Coca-Cola
She said fine
And then in thirty seconds time she said
I wanna live like common people
November 23, 2025 at 12:33 AM
She came from Greece she had a thirst for knowledge
She studied sculpture at Saint Martin's College
That's where I
Caught her eye
She told me that her dad was loaded
I said, that case I'll have rum and Coca-Cola
She said fine
And then in thirty seconds time she said
I wanna live like common people
She studied sculpture at Saint Martin's College
That's where I
Caught her eye
She told me that her dad was loaded
I said, that case I'll have rum and Coca-Cola
She said fine
And then in thirty seconds time she said
I wanna live like common people
I don’t know what an “Olivia Nunzzi” is. From the comments on here I gather she is a writer or reporter. I have a passing familiarity with an earlier scandal involving her. But I have steered clear. And I certainly have no idea of…whatever the fuck is making people lose their shit right now.
a bald man wearing glasses is making a funny face while sitting in front of a wall .
Alt: a bald man wearing glasses is making a funny face while sitting in front of a wall .
media.tenor.com
November 22, 2025 at 3:24 PM
I don’t know what an “Olivia Nunzzi” is. From the comments on here I gather she is a writer or reporter. I have a passing familiarity with an earlier scandal involving her. But I have steered clear. And I certainly have no idea of…whatever the fuck is making people lose their shit right now.
What a day, huh? The interview with Marjorie Taylor Greene on a Sunday show is gonna be something.
A friend is convinced she saw something in the Files and is just done with government.
A friend is convinced she saw something in the Files and is just done with government.
November 22, 2025 at 2:34 AM
What a day, huh? The interview with Marjorie Taylor Greene on a Sunday show is gonna be something.
A friend is convinced she saw something in the Files and is just done with government.
A friend is convinced she saw something in the Files and is just done with government.