T'Other Simon
@tothersimon.bsky.social
I'm only in it for the funny.
Middle distance punner and ukulele-botherer/'singer' with the multiple award-winning musical comedy idiots Plastic Jeezus.
www.plasticjeezus.co.uk
Middle distance punner and ukulele-botherer/'singer' with the multiple award-winning musical comedy idiots Plastic Jeezus.
www.plasticjeezus.co.uk
I originally wrote this joke as a tweet, but was quite pleased with it, so I recently tried it out in front of an audience. Here's how it went...
February 16, 2026 at 9:38 AM
I originally wrote this joke as a tweet, but was quite pleased with it, so I recently tried it out in front of an audience. Here's how it went...
Just discovered that the latest lineup of the Stone Temple Pilots have recorded studio quality 'live' versions of their first two albums. Sure, nobody can *really* replace Scott Weiland, but this dude does a really great job. And the recording sounds BRILLIANT. Check this out: youtu.be/OpAvGSktJoo
Stone Temple Pilots - Purple (Full album live, 2020)
YouTube video by Jimmy Lad
youtu.be
February 15, 2026 at 4:02 PM
Just discovered that the latest lineup of the Stone Temple Pilots have recorded studio quality 'live' versions of their first two albums. Sure, nobody can *really* replace Scott Weiland, but this dude does a really great job. And the recording sounds BRILLIANT. Check this out: youtu.be/OpAvGSktJoo
My fridge has a light that flashes if you leave the door open too long. No sound to alert me. It's one of the worst bits of design I've ever seen. It relies on me *looking* at my fridge in order to identify whether the door is open or not. The light seems pretty redundant at that point, doesn't it?
Come to Fesshole Live in 2026! Tickets on sale for Glasgow, Leicester, Luton, Leeds & Cambridge. Sweden Tour visits Malmö, Göteborg and Stockholm, and Anon Opin hits Leicester and Glasgow. Best of Fesshole, audience confessions, secret history & more: https://sites.google.com/view/fesshole
February 15, 2026 at 10:04 AM
My fridge has a light that flashes if you leave the door open too long. No sound to alert me. It's one of the worst bits of design I've ever seen. It relies on me *looking* at my fridge in order to identify whether the door is open or not. The light seems pretty redundant at that point, doesn't it?
Reposted by T'Other Simon
While Tony Blair famously hosted Noel Gallagher in Downing Street, Gordon Brown invited Spinal Tap, and they turned up to No. 11.
February 15, 2026 at 9:23 AM
While Tony Blair famously hosted Noel Gallagher in Downing Street, Gordon Brown invited Spinal Tap, and they turned up to No. 11.
I still think it's a shame that Asda has never collaborated with a major chain of fitness centres to create a gym wear range called 'David Lloyd-George'.
February 15, 2026 at 9:55 AM
I still think it's a shame that Asda has never collaborated with a major chain of fitness centres to create a gym wear range called 'David Lloyd-George'.
Come on Arte. You had 'Queens of the Iron Age' and you went with THIS?
February 14, 2026 at 12:54 PM
Come on Arte. You had 'Queens of the Iron Age' and you went with THIS?
I love how expressive cats faces are - with just a tiny, subtle change they can communicate a whole range of emotions from "Fuck off and leave me alone" all the way to "Feed me, and then fuck off and leave me alone".
February 14, 2026 at 12:15 PM
I love how expressive cats faces are - with just a tiny, subtle change they can communicate a whole range of emotions from "Fuck off and leave me alone" all the way to "Feed me, and then fuck off and leave me alone".
Funny old gig tonight. Got told I look like a young Benny Hill, which I found a bit distressing. Even more so, because the person who said it is the person who's narrating the audiobook I'm in the middle of, so every time I listen to it, I'm going to hear the distant strains of Yakety Sax.
February 13, 2026 at 11:14 PM
Funny old gig tonight. Got told I look like a young Benny Hill, which I found a bit distressing. Even more so, because the person who said it is the person who's narrating the audiobook I'm in the middle of, so every time I listen to it, I'm going to hear the distant strains of Yakety Sax.
My daughter just said "I think 25 is an honorary even number", and I reckon she's right.
February 13, 2026 at 3:07 PM
My daughter just said "I think 25 is an honorary even number", and I reckon she's right.
If I may have a minute of your time... Here's some silliness.
February 13, 2026 at 12:32 PM
If I may have a minute of your time... Here's some silliness.
You can't make a Hamlet without breaking some legs.
February 13, 2026 at 8:10 AM
You can't make a Hamlet without breaking some legs.
"I've been huffing exhaust fumes for years and it's never done me any harm" The President said, before falling off his chair into a pile of is own blood-flecked drool, curling himself into a ball, and starting to yap like a small dog.
February 13, 2026 at 4:07 AM
"I've been huffing exhaust fumes for years and it's never done me any harm" The President said, before falling off his chair into a pile of is own blood-flecked drool, curling himself into a ball, and starting to yap like a small dog.
Remember that urban legend about David Seaman needing to have his stomach pumped after consuming too many almonds?
February 12, 2026 at 8:16 PM
Remember that urban legend about David Seaman needing to have his stomach pumped after consuming too many almonds?
My wife and I sometimes like to wander about aimlessly. Just me and 'er.
February 12, 2026 at 8:08 PM
My wife and I sometimes like to wander about aimlessly. Just me and 'er.
This live performance by The Hives is one of the most entertaining things I've seen in a long time. It's silly, dramatic, joyful and generally just all the things that make me happy. Worth 35 mins of anyone's time. Trust me. Even if you don't know their music. It's so good. youtu.be/ImWDJvHLBLc
The Hives - Chapelle du Village Reille, Paris - ARTE Concert
YouTube video by ARTE Concert
youtu.be
February 12, 2026 at 8:06 PM
This live performance by The Hives is one of the most entertaining things I've seen in a long time. It's silly, dramatic, joyful and generally just all the things that make me happy. Worth 35 mins of anyone's time. Trust me. Even if you don't know their music. It's so good. youtu.be/ImWDJvHLBLc
I've been enjoying Small Prophets on a number of levels. Firstly, I'm really enjoying the writing and the performances. Secondly, and this is probably quite a personal one for me - I've enjoyed seeing people with the surnames 'Butt' and 'Cox' next to each other in the credits.
February 11, 2026 at 4:30 PM
I've been enjoying Small Prophets on a number of levels. Firstly, I'm really enjoying the writing and the performances. Secondly, and this is probably quite a personal one for me - I've enjoyed seeing people with the surnames 'Butt' and 'Cox' next to each other in the credits.
Just put new strings on my baritone ukulele, and wanted to test 'em out, so I thought I'd perform this song in a different key to usual. It's been quite popular on Facebook. Make of that what you will.
February 10, 2026 at 2:03 PM
Just put new strings on my baritone ukulele, and wanted to test 'em out, so I thought I'd perform this song in a different key to usual. It's been quite popular on Facebook. Make of that what you will.
Anyway - onto more interesting matters. I got to the end of the audiobook of 'Becoming Johnny Vegas' and I cannot tell you how much I loved it. I can't recommend it enough - even if his comedy isn't your cup of tea. It'll surprise you - in a good way.
February 9, 2026 at 8:32 PM
Anyway - onto more interesting matters. I got to the end of the audiobook of 'Becoming Johnny Vegas' and I cannot tell you how much I loved it. I can't recommend it enough - even if his comedy isn't your cup of tea. It'll surprise you - in a good way.
Man, we had a lovely day at Leicester Comedy Festival today. Two packed out shows, new stuff tried, nearly all of it 'worked', lots of laughter, a bit of ranting about this and that, and we finally sold the last of our 2025 t-shirts. And I was home in time to have a nice glass of wine with my wife.
February 8, 2026 at 10:20 PM
Man, we had a lovely day at Leicester Comedy Festival today. Two packed out shows, new stuff tried, nearly all of it 'worked', lots of laughter, a bit of ranting about this and that, and we finally sold the last of our 2025 t-shirts. And I was home in time to have a nice glass of wine with my wife.
Had a creatively 'interesting' day or so. Yesterday I wrote a GREAT chord progression. Mad, jazzy chords but it just WORKED. Just before I went to bed, I realised that it's the intro to 'Plush' by Stone Temple Pilots.
Today I wrote a seemingly throwaway line for our new show that I LOVE.
Today I wrote a seemingly throwaway line for our new show that I LOVE.
February 6, 2026 at 8:37 AM
Had a creatively 'interesting' day or so. Yesterday I wrote a GREAT chord progression. Mad, jazzy chords but it just WORKED. Just before I went to bed, I realised that it's the intro to 'Plush' by Stone Temple Pilots.
Today I wrote a seemingly throwaway line for our new show that I LOVE.
Today I wrote a seemingly throwaway line for our new show that I LOVE.
Just saw a dead centipede, a hundred feet in the air.
February 5, 2026 at 8:55 PM
Just saw a dead centipede, a hundred feet in the air.
"You'll just feel a little prick..."
February 5, 2026 at 8:27 PM
"You'll just feel a little prick..."
Reposted by T'Other Simon
and also that grail had holes in it, so it will be shit and all your lager will go all over the place.
February 5, 2026 at 6:57 PM
and also that grail had holes in it, so it will be shit and all your lager will go all over the place.
Pisses me right off that it just takes ONE grail to get ideas above its station and suddenly nobody has any time for any *normal* grails any more.
February 5, 2026 at 6:56 PM
Pisses me right off that it just takes ONE grail to get ideas above its station and suddenly nobody has any time for any *normal* grails any more.