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Pinned
new music video:
"either a prisoner or a prison guard"

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To the club
Where would you even wear these
January 21, 2026 at 3:09 AM
So crazy to use audience plants for a good thing, and not, like “this person was the victim of a horrible crime and that’s why we should kill all immigrants”
Mamdani on The View on new funding for universal childcare: "We actually have a mother in the audience -- Mallory -- who when the announcement was made, texted her husband to say, 'It might be time for a second kid.'"

Hosts: "Awwww"
January 20, 2026 at 8:20 PM
what percentage of trump's obsession with greenland do we think is due to the mercator projection making it look ~15x larger than it actually is
January 20, 2026 at 7:56 PM
So funny to be a major publication with professional researchers being like “citizens pay taxes” oh shit really? Do drivers cause traffic?
Of course we are! Duh.
January 20, 2026 at 8:24 AM
now imagine how much it could've made if they'd been brave and called it "Twotopia"
January 20, 2026 at 2:40 AM
Chengdu is by far the best place I’ve ever lived and everything was crazy affordable, I could go out three nights a week and everyone was hot 😭
ok like I legit can't explain how advanced, modern, international etc cities in China are right now, like it's insane, every single thing in the city cores is just max quality of life and convenience, advanced tech, trendy, aesthetic, fashionable, modern af idk, you have to experience it, bc
January 20, 2026 at 1:52 AM
if i were president i'd swear my oath on The Art of The Deal
January 20, 2026 at 1:33 AM
It rules how trump can say whatever dumb bullshit his aging, calcifying brain thinks of, then his whole legion of sycophants from republican senators to Fox News personalities have to go through the humiliation ritual of pretending like it’s a Serious Thing We’ve Always Needed
January 19, 2026 at 6:51 PM
Like, a huge part of right wing politics is just marketing for their lobbyists. Whole milk for the dairy lobbyists, war with Venezuela for the oil lobbyists, everything for military contractors, private prisons, crypto, banking… these people just fuggin love money so much
lots of good theories going around about the weird whole milk advertising going on right now, but my personal one is the milk industrial complex is worried and mad about the growth of milk alternatives like soy or oat milk and want to reclaim previous cultural dominance
January 18, 2026 at 9:24 PM
Lmfao the pressure is working we got centrists finally acknowledging the existence of the gestapo
Gallego: "I think ICE needs to be totally torn down. People want immigration enforcement that goes after criminals and focuses on criminals, not the goon squad that has come from Stephen Miller and Donald Trump."
January 18, 2026 at 7:42 PM
Men don’t shout “AWOOGA” when they see a beautiful woman and have their eyes pop so far out of their head they fall limp to the floor so the men have to sheepishly roll them back into their eye sockets anymore. Probably because of woke.
January 18, 2026 at 7:18 PM
Pretty unamerican not to get black rifle coffee…
The "everyone is 12" thesis of American political dysfunction remains undefeated in 2026.
January 18, 2026 at 5:16 AM
I think an effective line of questioning of trump that no reporters or dems ever seem to go for is “what the fuck are you talking about” or, the corollary, “who the fuck cares”

Could get a lot of mileage outta old faithful
January 18, 2026 at 5:12 AM
you barely hear conservatives talk about the biggest problem in america anymore (the fact that they made the green m&m unfuckable)
January 17, 2026 at 10:40 PM
brian goldstone should be allowed to kill one private equity ceo a month until housing prices go back down
January 17, 2026 at 8:47 PM
our special boys are going after the worst of the worst. hardened criminals. terrorists. drug smugglers. people who swear at us. delivery drivers. lesbians. photographers. kids sledding. elvis impersonators.
January 17, 2026 at 8:43 PM
(clocking into my job as social media manager of a multi-billion dollar company): BRING BACK TRIANGULAR BOOBS
January 16, 2026 at 9:47 PM
Can’t wait for Schumer to negotiate another billion in funding for chokehold training
damn -- CNN put together a video of Kristi Noem claiming ICE officers are "highly trained and skilled" and "gifted" alongside to a clip of them beating someone nearly to death in Minneapolis
January 16, 2026 at 9:22 PM
Can we all agree that “pedophile protector” is sort of a strange thing to shout at trump? Like… why add that second word
January 16, 2026 at 8:37 PM
(A liberal, seeing in 4K how fake the Nobel peace prize is, something from which a reasonable person could extrapolate that perhaps it has never been legitimately about “peace”): Yeah but MY president got it for real!
January 16, 2026 at 5:53 PM
The hottest woman you know is upvoting every comment on a meme post on the Top Chef subreddit where they’re writing the lyrics to a song with one word per comment. Humanity is capable of such multitudes.
January 16, 2026 at 2:02 AM
In 2004 the worst thing the average American could imagine was their mother in law being kinda bitchy to them. Now it’s being murdered by the president’s personal army because you were mean to them. That’s progress baby.
January 16, 2026 at 12:48 AM
If your house is on fire, and the firefighters show up and demand you compromise with the fire, just let it have half your house you’ll be fine, okay now 3/4ths, yeah it’s logical to be more mad at the firefighters than the fire.
January 15, 2026 at 9:35 PM
there's a huge percentage of liberals who think their main job in society is to prevent leftists from getting too radical and demanding too much instead of, like, to fight the right in any way
January 15, 2026 at 6:27 AM
Compromise: scanning the code should send you to a YouTube playlist of every time that guy has slipped and fallen in the snow, tripped trying to run off a curb, gotten winded going 1 block, tripped on his own shoelaces and yelled “waaaeeeuuuUUUGFH!”, etc. Then we can finally start to heal.
I am introducing the Quick Recognition (QR) Act, which requires ICE and CBP officers to wear uniforms featuring QR codes. When scanned, the code would generate a digital ID displaying the officer’s name, badge number, and law enforcement agency.

ICE should be unmasked both physically and digitally.
January 14, 2026 at 6:08 PM