AlanPadres
@alanpadres.bsky.social
Pragmatist/Optimist/Pessimist. New Grad Registered Nurse in the Pediatric ICU🙏❤️ Life is like a cake, there’s LAYERS to it! Context matters. GO PADRES!!!
Never mind. Just read he got divorced in 23’. Somehow that tracks
December 8, 2025 at 2:49 AM
Never mind. Just read he got divorced in 23’. Somehow that tracks
Not unless you’re married to one
December 8, 2025 at 2:48 AM
Not unless you’re married to one
When you have bloody stool but live in America and can’t afford healthcare so you dress up your toilet in red to make yourself feel better each time you shit
December 7, 2025 at 11:32 PM
When you have bloody stool but live in America and can’t afford healthcare so you dress up your toilet in red to make yourself feel better each time you shit
“Analysts argue the vacuum successfully lowers the concentration of household fecal matter.
Critics say it doesn’t deliver what’s promised.
This opinion piece argues why it’s time to address the root cause and for man to get a new best friend, saying bye to Fido . . . and saying hi to F”ai”do”
Critics say it doesn’t deliver what’s promised.
This opinion piece argues why it’s time to address the root cause and for man to get a new best friend, saying bye to Fido . . . and saying hi to F”ai”do”
December 7, 2025 at 8:57 PM
“Analysts argue the vacuum successfully lowers the concentration of household fecal matter.
Critics say it doesn’t deliver what’s promised.
This opinion piece argues why it’s time to address the root cause and for man to get a new best friend, saying bye to Fido . . . and saying hi to F”ai”do”
Critics say it doesn’t deliver what’s promised.
This opinion piece argues why it’s time to address the root cause and for man to get a new best friend, saying bye to Fido . . . and saying hi to F”ai”do”
They’ve been together over 1000 years she’s gotta be doing something right 😭❤️
December 7, 2025 at 7:58 PM
They’ve been together over 1000 years she’s gotta be doing something right 😭❤️
Cronenworth and VIP tickets to the next WWE event at Petco Park for Skenes
December 7, 2025 at 6:25 PM
Cronenworth and VIP tickets to the next WWE event at Petco Park for Skenes
“She tried to makeup for her faux pas, but there was no covering up that inflicted emotional blemish”
December 7, 2025 at 4:26 AM
“She tried to makeup for her faux pas, but there was no covering up that inflicted emotional blemish”
That 100k will then be taxed at like 50% and the remainder can only be used at Trump University
December 7, 2025 at 2:15 AM
That 100k will then be taxed at like 50% and the remainder can only be used at Trump University
Grinch out here catchin strays 🤣😭
December 7, 2025 at 1:11 AM
Grinch out here catchin strays 🤣😭
Maybe there’s some hidden big Pharma quota of vaccines per provider that once you hit it you receive a check in the mail.
Only one way to find out!
Only one way to find out!
a woman wearing sunglasses and a red headband says " you keep pushing ! "
ALT: a woman wearing sunglasses and a red headband says " you keep pushing ! "
media.tenor.com
December 6, 2025 at 10:16 PM
Maybe there’s some hidden big Pharma quota of vaccines per provider that once you hit it you receive a check in the mail.
Only one way to find out!
Only one way to find out!
In the pocket of Mother Nature, no doubt
December 6, 2025 at 10:11 PM
In the pocket of Mother Nature, no doubt
Just don’t inspect your pecker in the sunlight
a person is holding a magnifying glass over a planet
ALT: a person is holding a magnifying glass over a planet
media.tenor.com
December 6, 2025 at 9:33 PM
Just don’t inspect your pecker in the sunlight
“Singles run club?
No.
Costco run singles club?
👀”
No.
Costco run singles club?
👀”
December 5, 2025 at 6:10 PM
“Singles run club?
No.
Costco run singles club?
👀”
No.
Costco run singles club?
👀”
Ken Rosenthal: “President Trump has done so much to advance the game. Click to read why I think Fernando Tatis Jr deserves to be picked off in one of those drug boats”
December 5, 2025 at 5:44 PM
Ken Rosenthal: “President Trump has done so much to advance the game. Click to read why I think Fernando Tatis Jr deserves to be picked off in one of those drug boats”
“What really sealed the deal was naming the Institute of Peace after himself. A true leader”
December 5, 2025 at 5:41 PM
“What really sealed the deal was naming the Institute of Peace after himself. A true leader”
Then all American restaurants would go out of business though
December 5, 2025 at 5:39 PM
Then all American restaurants would go out of business though
Probably a decision by private equity or something to save .005 cents per tender
December 5, 2025 at 5:35 PM
Probably a decision by private equity or something to save .005 cents per tender
Just kidding, Trump can’t read
December 5, 2025 at 5:32 PM
Just kidding, Trump can’t read