Alex Wood
@alexwood.codes
Senior SDE at AWS. Purveyor of puns.
🏌🏻🐶🏋🏻♂️👨🏻🍳🍷🥃
💎🦀🐍
🏌🏻🐶🏋🏻♂️👨🏻🍳🍷🥃
💎🦀🐍
Me, to wife looking in cabinet while I’m making shopping list: “I’m pretty sure we have basmati rice, right?”
Wife: “WE HAVE FIVE SMALL BAGS, WE DON’T NEED MORE!!!”
Me: “I mean I figured but-“
Wife: “Oh I take it back one of these is Jasmine Rice.”
Wife: “WE HAVE FIVE SMALL BAGS, WE DON’T NEED MORE!!!”
Me: “I mean I figured but-“
Wife: “Oh I take it back one of these is Jasmine Rice.”
November 15, 2025 at 5:57 PM
Me, to wife looking in cabinet while I’m making shopping list: “I’m pretty sure we have basmati rice, right?”
Wife: “WE HAVE FIVE SMALL BAGS, WE DON’T NEED MORE!!!”
Me: “I mean I figured but-“
Wife: “Oh I take it back one of these is Jasmine Rice.”
Wife: “WE HAVE FIVE SMALL BAGS, WE DON’T NEED MORE!!!”
Me: “I mean I figured but-“
Wife: “Oh I take it back one of these is Jasmine Rice.”
“Wow Yoshinobu Yamamoto won 3 games in the World Series!”
“Look at Mr Constency, winning games 1, 4, and 7 clearly.”
“Ummm….”
“Look at Mr Constency, winning games 1, 4, and 7 clearly.”
“Ummm….”
Yoshinobu Yamamoto was worth the $325M even if his arm falls off tomorrow. Two titles they definitely wouldn’t have won without him. Four hard earned World Series wins in four appearances.
HOW
open.substack.com/pub/mollykni...
HOW
open.substack.com/pub/mollykni...
November 4, 2025 at 7:05 AM
“Wow Yoshinobu Yamamoto won 3 games in the World Series!”
“Look at Mr Constency, winning games 1, 4, and 7 clearly.”
“Ummm….”
“Look at Mr Constency, winning games 1, 4, and 7 clearly.”
“Ummm….”
This is a Yoshinobu Yamamoto skeet
November 2, 2025 at 3:42 AM
This is a Yoshinobu Yamamoto skeet
My wife just now: “How many innings do you think this goes?”
Me: “Ehh probably Freeman just gonna mash one and end it.”
What I’m saying internet is you’re welcome.
Me: “Ehh probably Freeman just gonna mash one and end it.”
What I’m saying internet is you’re welcome.
October 28, 2025 at 6:52 AM
My wife just now: “How many innings do you think this goes?”
Me: “Ehh probably Freeman just gonna mash one and end it.”
What I’m saying internet is you’re welcome.
Me: “Ehh probably Freeman just gonna mash one and end it.”
What I’m saying internet is you’re welcome.
And here comes the rain for the second half of Illinois-Washington…
October 25, 2025 at 9:20 PM
And here comes the rain for the second half of Illinois-Washington…
The Kreutz dropped pick six feels like it may be the difference. Not comfortable with our only stop being from a dropped pass.
October 25, 2025 at 9:20 PM
The Kreutz dropped pick six feels like it may be the difference. Not comfortable with our only stop being from a dropped pass.
In deep cover in enemy territory!
October 25, 2025 at 7:14 PM
In deep cover in enemy territory!
Reposted by Alex Wood
Longtime Seattle Mariners fandom makes one hardened against any pain.
October 6, 2025 at 2:39 AM
Longtime Seattle Mariners fandom makes one hardened against any pain.
Nothing can stop Jorge Polanco
October 13, 2025 at 10:45 PM
Nothing can stop Jorge Polanco
Seattle right now
a white coffin is sitting on top of a roof with a blue sky in the background
Alt: Man comes out of a coffin on the back of a truck and starts dancing
media.tenor.com
October 11, 2025 at 5:14 AM
Seattle right now
Reposted by Alex Wood
Checks in on the baseball
![Justin Klugh
@justin_klugh
JOE BUCK: Welcome to the top of the 47th
[Sun rises]
[Sun keeps getting bigger]
BUCK: yes
[World engulfed by flames]
BUCK: oh god yes
1:13 AM • Oct 28, 2015 • Twitter Web Client
14.9K Retweets
1,997 Quote Tweets
29.7K Likes](https://cdn.bsky.app/img/feed_thumbnail/plain/did:plc:upyx3raxzpwlnzojrncogd7y/bafkreiczbp37nmuosnvgyrbv3nfdxupczam3ezjeri5cpio36htjuyiisy@jpeg)
October 11, 2025 at 4:13 AM
Checks in on the baseball
All I ask as a Mariners fan is to let me suffer like this through at least one 7 game series, also.
October 11, 2025 at 3:32 AM
All I ask as a Mariners fan is to let me suffer like this through at least one 7 game series, also.
Longtime Seattle Mariners fandom makes one hardened against any pain.
October 6, 2025 at 2:39 AM
Longtime Seattle Mariners fandom makes one hardened against any pain.
Reposted by Alex Wood
The 2025 Illinois football experience:
September 27, 2025 at 7:39 PM
The 2025 Illinois football experience:
Love when a cornerback jumps a route instead of playing their assignment.
I-L-L
I-L-L
September 21, 2025 at 12:13 AM
Love when a cornerback jumps a route instead of playing their assignment.
I-L-L
I-L-L
Walked into a Starbucks this morning ugly laughing like an idiot because I was listening to the Disney segment of this podcast episode.
Thank God the staff there knows me and wanted details instead of asking me politely but firmly to leave 😅
Thank God the staff there knows me and wanted details instead of asking me politely but firmly to leave 😅
Disney scuba heist Clay Helton doinks have actually been clongs for quite some time now Dabo Swinney don't get Ecked exploding Costco wine Jon Gruden pizza sex party
The Thomas Drown Affair / Ecks vs. Severance
Podcast Episode · Shutdown Fullcast · 09/17/2025 · 1h 43m
podcasts.apple.com
September 17, 2025 at 10:05 PM
Walked into a Starbucks this morning ugly laughing like an idiot because I was listening to the Disney segment of this podcast episode.
Thank God the staff there knows me and wanted details instead of asking me politely but firmly to leave 😅
Thank God the staff there knows me and wanted details instead of asking me politely but firmly to leave 😅
Seeing that land bridge I keep thinking about the allied video guide to transiting through East Germany to Berlin, and what such a land corridor would be like if this happened.
September 16, 2025 at 10:17 PM
Seeing that land bridge I keep thinking about the allied video guide to transiting through East Germany to Berlin, and what such a land corridor would be like if this happened.
When your primary care just got a stock of new COVID vaccines
a pixelated image of a person 's face against a black backdrop
Alt: Cat jamming out
media.tenor.com
September 16, 2025 at 8:45 PM
When your primary care just got a stock of new COVID vaccines
My son now communicates like a Tamarian.
Move over “Darmok and Jalad at Tanagra” - here comes “Tommy Green Fire Alarm, Black Car”
Move over “Darmok and Jalad at Tanagra” - here comes “Tommy Green Fire Alarm, Black Car”
September 7, 2025 at 10:50 PM
My son now communicates like a Tamarian.
Move over “Darmok and Jalad at Tanagra” - here comes “Tommy Green Fire Alarm, Black Car”
Move over “Darmok and Jalad at Tanagra” - here comes “Tommy Green Fire Alarm, Black Car”
How many turnovers did Duke have against Illinois today?
a group of people wearing champions t-shirts are standing in a crowd .
Alt: Greg Popovich counting to 5
media.tenor.com
September 6, 2025 at 7:33 PM
How many turnovers did Duke have against Illinois today?
Illinois’ run game in the final drive.
a man in a blue jacket is sitting in a dark room with a light shining on him .
Alt: Crunk Ain’t Dead revival gif
media.tenor.com
September 6, 2025 at 7:29 PM
Illinois’ run game in the final drive.