Alice M. Phillips
@alicemphillips.bsky.social
3.1K followers 490 following 1.2K posts
Prone to falling down rabbit holes. Humor writer and comedian with work in Reductress, McSweeney's, Points in Case, The Belladonna, Slackjaw, and elsewhere. https://www.alicemphillips.com Prev.: Davidson, NYU Law, POTUS 44, and public defense in SC.
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Reposted by Alice M. Phillips
chrismurphyct.bsky.social
Just bone chilling. And when the imprisonment of critics is combined with his offer to enrich and immunize his loyalists, this is how democracies die fast.

But it's still our choice. Don't let him silence you.
alicemphillips.bsky.social
Twelve tracks and the one that gets stuck in my head is “Wood” 😑
alicemphillips.bsky.social
Me, at Starbucks: I do NOT need a croissant
Me, arriving home, after Starbucks: ☹️ why I no buy croissant
alicemphillips.bsky.social
We were never able to even finish our 3 y/o’s original series. We did one at 6 mos, the next on schedule, and then pediatrician ran out and said they weren’t ordering more due to lack of demand. We couldn’t find one 150 mi in either direction. Gave up. Haven’t even bothered trying to find a booster.
Reposted by Alice M. Phillips
chrismurphyct.bsky.social
This has nothing to do with crime. This is an attempt to crush political dissent.

Never before, in our entire 250 year history, has the military or immigration agents been used like this. It's dystopian, illegal, and it should stop.
alicemphillips.bsky.social
Okay, maybe there’s something to advanced maternal age. Or maybe it’s the two littles. In my first pregnancy at like 33 weeks a colleague and I were gearing up to try a big burglary case and I was FIRED UP. I’m about to be 31 weeks right now and I am TIRED UP. Even typing this is effortful.
Reposted by Alice M. Phillips
mskellymhayes.bsky.social
I’m. So. Tired.

I don’t just want you to pay attention to Chicago because I want you to understand our plight. I want you to see how hard people are fighting and know wtf you’re made of. We’re not just fighting for this place. This is for all of us.
alicemphillips.bsky.social
(Honestly…iconic. Mrs. E living her best life.)
alicemphillips.bsky.social
Today, my son and I were eating boiled peanuts in our driveway, when a sweet neighbor w/early Alzheimer’s wandered over. After 5 min of conversation, she picked up our bag of peanuts and said she’d see us later. My son politely asked if she’d plz leave the peanuts, but she declined and walked home 🤣
alicemphillips.bsky.social
I get that many childhood pleasures we outgrow, but who’s dumb idea was it to trade that delicious pink amoxicillin concoction for nasty bitter pills?
alicemphillips.bsky.social
Sigh. As of yesterday, we have measles cases and (likely) community spread sufficient for the CDC to classify SC as in an outbreak. All cases so far have afflicted unvaccinated SC residents. What a timeline.
alicemphillips.bsky.social
Watching the South Carolina S.323 testimony yesterday and I am just blown away by the number of women and doctors who say if the bill passes they will no longer be able to live/practice here and they will leave. Same--that was the substance of my written testimony--but amazing how consistent it is.
alicemphillips.bsky.social
Last night I fell asleep reading an excellent book—woke up to the book falling out of my hands, put it on my nightstand, turned out the light and conked out. Going to work on making that a nightly thing. Delightful after years (😳) of passing out with my eyes strained from staring at my phone.
Reposted by Alice M. Phillips
reichlinmelnick.bsky.social
Surreal moment for America. Needless to say, if the normal police ever pulled something like this — pulling every single person out of an apartment building and handcuffing them to run warrant checks — they would be sued into oblivion.

Yet ICE is going to get away with it entirely.
"It was scary, because I had never had a gun in my face," Fisher said. "They asked my name and my date of birth and asked me, did I have any warrants? And I told them, 'No, 'Ididn't."
Fisher said she was handcuffed before being released around 3 a.m., and she was told that if anyone had any kind of warrant out for them, even if it was unrelated to immigration, they would not be released.
alicemphillips.bsky.social
Not sure whether it’s Fort Jackson or a construction site but it’s way too early for all this loud banging about 😖
Reposted by Alice M. Phillips
schumer.senate.gov
Yes to ballrooms. No to healthcare for Americans. Got it.
A headline from People reads: “White House Will Continue Construction on 90,000-Square-Foot Ballroom During Government Shutdown”
alicemphillips.bsky.social
3 of 4 pregnancy vaccines done 🥳 tomorrow is going to suck lol. But whew! I am so grateful that for all the worry over whether I’d be able to get them at all that my son will have this protection. And 🙏🏻 that he will be able to get his hep b on time.
alicemphillips.bsky.social
Oh no! Not Jane Goodall! One of those people you just expect to live forever.
alicemphillips.bsky.social
This is so funny! Well done! And welcome to the McSweeney’s Boob Open Letter club!
alicemphillips.bsky.social
July 2022 - coincidentally also 7 months pregnant and at the Statehouse shouting against SC GOP BS. Sadly we lost that fight and now have the 6 week ban, but this time I have more hope. S.323 is the most barbaric abortion bill our state—and for that matter, our country—has seen. NO MORE BANS!
Me in 2022, 32 and 7 months pregnant in a teal dress, catching some shade with Planned Parenthood on the very hot July day after almost 3 hours in line to testify inside (no go)
alicemphillips.bsky.social
Incredible turnout at the Statehouse! Only saw about 10 anti-choice protesters in this big loud crowd. Always a comfort to see these kinds of turnouts—and this is just the people who could come out on a Wednesday morning.
alicemphillips.bsky.social
Thank you! Haha I mistyped - “especially under the circumstances!” The sense of solidarity was very energizing!
alicemphillips.bsky.social
Something oddly comforting about being among hundreds, if not thousands, of pro-choice protesters gathered at the SC Statehouse, even under the circumstances. Great conversations volunteering at the @psabortionfund.bsky.social table! NO to S.323!
SC Statehouse among fellow protesters (mid 30s white woman 7 months pregnant in navy dress with red sticker and white cardigan)