Chris
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ary.bsky.social
Chris
@ary.bsky.social
1.2K followers 150 following 25K posts
Occasional writer, sometimes game developer, constant spreadsheet nerd. '90. He/him/any.

Mute #uspolitics to avoid my copious posts about the state of the world
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ary.bsky.social
make stuff with alt text
Panel 1 of a comic Big block letters title it "Make Stuff." Derek stands leaning over, buttering toast. Derek: "Drawin' is fun." Derek: "Give it a try sometime." Derek: "Quality don't matter." Panel 2 of a comic Derek continues buttering toast. Derek: "It's kinda like a calorie?" Derek: "A drawin' is like some kinda high energy construct that transfers a charge from the drawer all the way over to the folks lookin' at it." Derek: "Use any old scraps you got layin' around. It'll still be cool." Panel 3 of a comic Derek stops scraping butter on toast. Derek: "Maybe every new drawin' is another domino tipped?" Panel 4 of a comic Derek's smallest child has entered with a haughty look and a big block letter "AHEM." Child: "I'm not gonna eat that." Derek looks haunted and resumes scraping, vigorously.
February 17, 2026 at 8:27 AM
ary.bsky.social
close-out (2/2)
Panel 4 of a comic Derek is reading through one volume of the encyclopedia on a counter with another and some other clutter nearby. Derek: "Wow! This is alphabetized and separated by subject matter. Adultery, banana peels, centaurs, diet, golf, Hitler..." Derek scratches his head. Derek: "Oh." Derek: "Nothin' about hunger." Panel 5 of a comic Derek rubs his head, looking frazzled as smoke rises from his brain. Derek: "Dang. No entries for 'poor', 'poverty', 'welfare'. But kleptomania, galley slaves, and zombies. Derek: "I'm not mad. I just feel stupid." Derek: "Maybe cartoonin' just ain't for me." A big block letter "BAM!" from off-screen. Derek's smallest child, from off-screen: "Dad! I jumpt on my bed and my bed broke!" Derek: "Okay! I'm comin'!" Panel 6 of a comic Derek is leaned over, having just placed the stack of encyclopedias beneath a bed. He has a proud, closed-eye look on his face. Derek: "Here ya go! A great use for these huge books!" Derek: "Your bed is repaired, sir." Derek's smallest child also looks proud, eyes closed, arms at invisible suspenders. Derek's child: "I feel like the Great Gatsby." A photograph of actual New Yorker cartoon encyclopedias being used to prop up a bed.
February 17, 2026 at 8:20 AM
ary.bsky.social
close-out (1/2), now with alt text
Panel 1 of a comic Big block letters title it "Close-out" Derek stands in a dingy-looking store. There's a shelf labelled "Dented Cans" and a counter labelled "Fire Damage Salvage", from which he is holding a beat-up box. Derek: "A full-on giant honkin' encyclopedia of New Yorker cartoons?!" Derek: "Holy mackerel! Score!" Panel 2 of a comic Derek walks away from the counter, hands in pockets, looking disappointed. Derek: "Eh, twenty-five dang dollars?" Derek: "Too rich for my blood. I came here to find some discount expired food stuffs." Derek: "Maybe eventually..." Panel 3 of a comic Derek is dumping a jar of coins into a coin-counting machine beside a photocopier. Derek: "After months of saving loose change-" There are many jingling and plinking sound effects. Derek: "those books will finally be mine!"
February 17, 2026 at 8:20 AM
ary.bsky.social
Love a moment of serendipity
Zoë's post directly above a post about the animated show Knights of Guinevere being greenlit, which quotes a piece of art of a heavily damaged robot lady from the show.
February 14, 2026 at 1:06 PM
ary.bsky.social
Damn, our bard is taking our penultimate session of the campaign hella seriously.
Two natural 20s on Performance checks in a row, for two 29s.
February 8, 2026 at 2:50 PM
ary.bsky.social
Panel from The Enigma of Amigara Fault by Junji Ito showing a man climbing into a man shaped hole in a sheer cliff. He looks wild, and is shouting "This is my hole!" "It was made for me!"
February 7, 2026 at 5:52 PM
ary.bsky.social
The dentist gave me a spare set of teeth, just in case!
Plaster casts of my teeth. They're not in the greatest shape, but they get the job done.
February 6, 2026 at 4:37 PM
ary.bsky.social
comics about food, alt texted
Panel 1 of a comic Derek sits at a table in an old times chair, with a candle mounted on the wall nearby. He has a rope around his neck and is crying a lot, leaning forward on one hand. Derek: "From the tiny world of comics to the halls of academia, all the way to the highest positions of power–" Derek: "– weird old pervert silver spoon guys rule the world." Derek, big block letters: "wah" Derek: "A person like me ain't built for this world." Derek's smallest child stands beside the table. Smallest child: "Dad. Hungry." Derek, big block letters: "Snif?" Derek, small aside: "Scratch" Derek, big block letters: "Sob" Panel 2 of a comic Derek: "I can't find no reason to keep on goin', unless–" Big block letter "wah" is interrupted by big block letter "aha!" Derek, small aside: "Gasp." Derek: "Eureka! I'll use humor to domesticate this twisted reality! Ha!" The candle makes a small "fzz!" sound effect. Smallest child: "Can you just buy us food?" Smallest child's stomach makes a small "growl." sound effect. Panel 3 of a comic Caption: "And so..." Derek stands in a kitchen in an oversized suit, looking nervous. Derek: "Hey, um–" Derek, small aside: "Heh." Derek: "Don't get mad and burn down the house like a psycho killer for once in your lifetime, but I ain't got no food. I'm broke, heh." Derek's smallest child stands with chin in hand. Smallest child: "That's enough." Smallest child, small aside: "Ugh." Panel 4 of a comic Derek looks shocked. His smallest child stands severely with glasses, a folder, and a pen in the hand behind their back. Derek: "Qu'est-ce que c'est?" Smallest child: "The other kids and I have assembled these emancipation forms. It's like divorce for kids. From parents." Derek: "This is not my beautiful life." Smallest child: "Dad." Smallest child: "Please just stop." Smallest child, big block letters: "Sigh"
February 4, 2026 at 4:27 PM
ary.bsky.social
divine revelation made accessible

(sorry it's late y'all, I was too busy dreaming)
Panel 1 of a comic Big block letters title it "Divine Revelation" Derek lies in bed with his eyes closed. The background is filled with a mix of "zzzz" and alarm sound effects. Derek, small aside: "Snore" Derek: "Why?" Derek: "Keep goin'?" Panel 2 of a comic Derek has startled awake and had drool all over his face. The "zzzz" sound effects give way to "Awake!", "Snort!", "omg.", and "Gurp?" Derek: "Tell me the answer–" Derek, small aside: "Guh!" Derek: "I almost had somethin'! It's fadin' fast! Gotta get back to it!" Panel 3 of a comic Derek looks more lucid, if tired. Derek: "I choose to believe dreams are a literal delivery system for some divine inspiration. Why not?" Derek, small aside: "Yawn." Derek: "I mean, did Jacob reason away transcendence at Bethel?" Derek: "Okay, back to dreamin'." The "zzzz" sound effects resume. Panel 4 of a comic "Below the surface is an unspoken agenda at work." "By quitting you become part of the dark reinforcing narrative." "Heed my word, informed by centuries of hard-earned wisdom. Consider yourself lucky, mortal. You have been granted audience with–" Big block letters: "Blacula!" Blacula's stereotypical vampiric form fills the background behind Derek asleep in his bed. There are more "zzzz" sound effects and he's smiling contentedly. Derek: "Heck yeah." Derek, small aside: "Snore!"
February 4, 2026 at 4:14 AM
ary.bsky.social
I did click the link lol
Instagram telling me to log in to see a video
February 1, 2026 at 7:12 PM
ary.bsky.social
they're cowards and losers and now there's alt text about it
A single panel comic told in multiple small scenes Big block letters title it "A softly crying call of duty pig boy", with an illustration above of basically the title, a guy with rifle hiding behind a wall, firing and crying. Scene 1 A big block letter "Bam!" sound effect sits above Derek, leaning against a telephone pole and looking back at the viewer over his shoulder. A car burns out in the background. A bottle that may be lighter fluid is near his feet. Derek: "Oh, hey." Derek: "I didn't see u there." Scene 2 Derek slips off his jacket as he answers a phone. Derek: "Just in time for a new comic—" A big block letter "Rinnngg" sound effect interrupts him. Derek: "—oh, one second." Derek: "Hello? Uh-huh. Ok." Derek: "Yes, I'll say that." Scene 3 There's a jaggy line indicating a scene change or passing time. Derek stands in a turtleneck, his arms raised with two peace signs. Hs has on a magnanimous smile, eyes closed. There are "Bam" sound effects and flashes, and multiple microphone-holding hands pointed at him. Derek: "Hey! There's nothin' wrong with crying, or bein' soft. Or pig boys." Derek: "I'm still a nice guy and that's what matters!" Things get a little disjointed here but I'll try to get the order right. Scene 4 Derek pushes a rock up a hill like Sisyphus. Derek: ""Can't be like them."" Derek: "Hmm, is our civility holding back the chaos?" Derek: "Or are we enabling it with our reliable "civility"?" Scene 5: A street at night. Derek stands over a body with dark liquid on his hands, and the body's head. A gun lies nearby. Big block letters say "Can't do this" Derek: "But I wanna." Scene 6 Close-up of Derek sweating, holding a pencil. Derek: "So, for the greater good I'm not going to name names. Instead I've been "Mega-voting" for 24 hours straight." Scene 7 Energizer Bunny Derek bangs his drum. Derek: "Don't react. Be better. Do the right thing." Derek: "For infinity." Continued in the second image. Part 2 of the same picture's alt text Scene 8 Closeup of Derek with red all over his face. A big block letter "bam" and laughter fills the background. Derek: "Can't do that." Derek: "Other ones can, tho." Scene 9 Derek sits cross-legged, dressed as a Buddhist monk, his arms raised above his head and his eyes closed. Derek: "Kinda seems like an excuse to do nothin'. Idk." Big block letter sound effects "Bam" "Bam" Derek: "Hey. Pls. don't be scared soft pig boy." Nearby a softly crying call of duty pig boy cries and toots, jumping int he air in fear and firing a rifle wildly. Soft Pig Boy, big block letters: "I'm scared." From off-panel: "Help!" Big block letter sound effects "Aaaaaaa" Derek: "This is what I'm SUPPOSED to do, right??"
January 26, 2026 at 1:43 PM
ary.bsky.social
drag the body.
with alt text.
A single panel comic told in small scenes Big block letters title it "drag the body." Scene 1 Spooky Derek sits on a pile of skulls, in a robe and sandals, with a book on his lap, a big standing candlestick nearby, and green smoke in the background. Spooky Derek is smiling dangerously. He's got claw-like fingernails. It might not actually be Derek but I'm running with it. Derek: "Here's a spooky tale. A home invasion in 1975. Nice-ville, Florida." Derek: "But it's not very" Derek, big block letters: "NICE!" Scene 2 Spooky Derek, from off-panel: "My very own mother, at home all alone... or not?" A chained-closed door is cracked open, an arm reaching through the gap with "Bang" and "Bam" sound effects. The mother stands nearby in very 70s clothing—purple flares, dark reddish boots with heels, and a long-sleeved green top. She's got pointy 70s glasses and long curly bright orange hair. She's flinching enough to be lifted into the air, dropping the drink she has just poured from a pitcher on the counter. Mother, in big block letters: "Aaaa" Scene 3 The mother runs for an old corded telephone on a small table, her head turned straight upward in fright. Mother, in big block letters: "Help! Someone is in my house!" The Phone: "Stay on the line, we are on our way!" Scene 4 A cop inspects the door casually as the mother sits on an ottoman. Cop: "Yes, this definitely was a break-in." Cop: "You gotta get a gun." Scene 5 The cop is smoking with a hand on his hip, the other hand points upward emphatically. Cop: "Buy a gun then if anybody, & I mean ANYBODY comes in your yard blow 'em away." The cop then points down at the ground, where there's a lit arrow for emphasis. Cop: "Drag the body into your house past this line here. THEN call us, that way you're clear." Scene 5 The mother stands and approaches the crouching cop. Mother: "So, basically you're telling me how to get away with murder?" Cop: "Geez, lady. When you put it THAT way you make it sound bad."
January 26, 2026 at 1:23 PM
ary.bsky.social
bsky.app/profile/dere...
Panel 5 of a comic Derek stands casually leaning against a table in his home with a steaming mug of tea on it. He's gone from a t-shirt to a handsomely disheveled suit. Derek: "What a comic, folks." Derek: "Thanks for readin'!" Derek, small aside: "Ha!" There are more laughter and clapping sound effects, which I believe are all meant to be an audience but it could be that Derek is laughing more too. Derek, big block letters that drip: "Cough" Panel 6 of a comic Derek turns away from the camera, bent over slightly with his fist to his mouth again. Derek: "Excuse me—" Derek, small aside: "Gasp" Derek, small aside: "Choke!" The background is filled with many big block letter sound effects indicating a hacking cough and wheezing. Panel 7 of a comic Derek stands straight again, looking somewhat conspiratorially toward the viewer. Derek, big block letters: "Gasp" Derek, small aside: "Hey" Derek, small aside: "Psst." Derek: "The rulebook only exists to maintain the myth of individualism by keepin' most of the necessary work of life financially unprofitable, so that the more profitable work can be taken by folks that got more privilege and ironically, usually don't need the work as much." Panel 8 of a comic Derek once again looks slumped over and has a fist to his mouth. Derek, big block letters that drip: "Coff!" Derek, small aside: "Um." Derek: "At least we have each other" Everything past "at least" in the previous speech bubble is partially obscured by many more big block letter coughing, hacking, wheezing, and gagging sound effects.
January 23, 2026 at 1:29 PM
ary.bsky.social
the rulebook with alt text (1/2)
Alt text author note: This is a rather long and involved comic so my description of background details and sound effects will not be as detailed as usual. Panel 1 of a comic Big block letters spell out the title, "The Rulebook" Derek stands in a long coat in front of an urban background, with traffic sounds and people milling about. He holds a fist up to his mouth. Derek, small aside: "Snif." Derek, big block letters: "Coff" A nearby crossing guard is giving Derek a knowing look, one hand raised into the air for emphasis. Crossing Guard: "Take care of yourself, Mr. Ballard. You know us American single parents ain't allowed no sick days! It's against the rules!" Crossing guard, small aside: "lol" Panel 2 of a comic Derek rushes home against further urban sights and sounds in the background, looking concerned. Derek, big block letters: "What?" Derek, small aside: "omg!" Derek: "That's a rule?!" Derek, big block letters: "Coff! Coff" Derek: "She's gotta be jokin'! I gotta check the rulebook!" Panel 3 of a comic Derek sits in a cozy chair at home, pointing as he reads a book in his lap. Derek: "Well I'll be darned." Derek, small aside: "Gasp" Panel 4 of a comic Same as the previous panel, but Derek is looking upward thoughtfully. Derek: "She wasn't jokin'." Derek, big block letters with drippy bits: "Cough." In the background, after Derek's lines, there are many big block letter sound effects indicating studio audience canned laughter and clapping.
January 23, 2026 at 1:16 PM
ary.bsky.social
Like lookit this shit. Hell yeah.
A screenshot of much of the cast of Stickin' Around. Everyone's got sticks for arms and legs and necks, very simplistic cartoonish shapes for heads and bodies, odd-sized eyes, scribbly hair, and the backgrounds are like a psychedelic painting.
January 21, 2026 at 4:41 AM
ary.bsky.social
Officially I do not endorse any crimes.

www.buttersafe.com/2026/01/15/m...
A 12 panel comic Panel 1 "Time for another episode of" "Crime Boyz" The O in Boyz is a head with a black toque and black strip across the eyes, stereotypical criminal style. Panel 2 Two stereotypical criminals, complete with striped clothing, stand together. They are the titular Crime Boyz. Crime Boy 1: "It is not only fun to commit crime, it is..." Panel 3 Both Crime Boyz strike a dynamic pose on a starburst background. Crime Boy 1: "A moral imperative!" Panel 4 Crime Boy 1 is alone, handcuffed. Criminal 1: "Law is stagnation. It is how those on top consolidate the power that keeps them there. Law is a wall built to box people in and keep change out." Panel 5 Crime Boy 1 breaks the handcuffs and stands triumphantly in front of another starburst background. Crime Boy 1: "Crime transcends those boundaries. It imagines a world where you dictate your actions, rather than having them dictated for you." Panel 6 Both Crime Boyz are in frame again. Crime Boy 1 smiles slightly. Crime Boy 2: "Crime is creativity. Crime is a world that can evolve and grow. Crime is taking a guy's wallet. Crime is freedom." Panel 7 Crime Boy 1 is revealed to be talking to a group of children seated on the floor. Crime Boy 1: "And with that, you all graduate!" Panel 8 A police officer swings a door open and points at both Crime Boyz, who look at the officer. Police Officer: "Hey! You can't just take a bunch of kids and start a crime kindergarten!" Panel 9 Crime Boy 2 stands with hands on hips and winks, with a little "wink" sound effect. Crime Boy 2: "Or can we?" Panel 10 Closeup on police officer. Police Officer: "Also, schools don't usually graduate their students after a single one minute speech." Panel 11 Crime Boy 2 closes his other eye, with a small "a second wink overlapping with the first one, somehow" sound effect. Panel 12 "Crime Boyz" appears as in the first panel. Watermark for www.buttersafe.com Copyright notice for Alex Culang and Raynato Castro.
January 20, 2026 at 5:42 PM
ary.bsky.social
werewolf hunter-d

alt texted and ready to go
Panel 1 of a comic Big block letters title it "Werewolf Hunter-D!" Derek stalks forward with a prideful look, the full moon-lit neighbhourhood in the background filled with silhouettes in vaguely threatening poses. There are also many big block letter sound effects, as follows: "Grrr" "Howll" "Rawr" "Aaa" "Aa" "Chomp!" "Howlll" "Roar!" Derek: "The werewolves are massacrin' folks! We gotta stop 'em!" Derek's medium child, behind Derek, is punching their fists into the air and looking stoked. Medium child: "Yeah! Let's get 'em! We got this!" Derek: "Follow me!" Derek: "I've got stuff in my shed!" Panel 2 of a comic Derek, looking a bit silly, points at a wall of tools and sports equipment with a small "nudge" sound effect: various shears, a set of golf clubs, a shovel, an axe, and a machete. The long shears have a small "Bling." sound effect Derek: "Check it out." Derek, small aside: "Eh? Eh?" Derek: "Looks like werewolf meat's back on the menu, boys." There's a big block letter musical note on the previous speech balloon. Derek, small aside: "Dur." Panel 3 of a comic Medium child, in very big block letters: "Violence?!" They look appalled, a hand over their mouth in shock. Medium child: "Omg, no! I meant post a good reel or write a really moving poem." Derek looks at the machete now in his hand, abashed. It makes a "Bling." sound effect. Derek, small aside: "Oops!" Derek: "You're right, I'm so sorry." Panel 4 of a comic Derek crosses his arms and makes a big toothy haughty face, with a little star indicating maybe a tsk or gritted teeth. Derek: "Violence is dumb. Makin' art is way better." Derek: "I should make a comic about it instead." In the background there are stars indicating a ruckus. Medium child is pointing to themselves with a small "Me" and "Me!" sound effect on each hand, making a greedy sort of face. Medium child: "Actually, you can use this stuff to do the lawn at one of my airbnb's!" Medium child: "I know you need the money." Medium child: "And I'll write a poignant poem!" Medium child: "About voting!" The background is filled with big block letter music notes, a "Howl!" sound effect, and a lot of "hahaha" sound effects.
January 19, 2026 at 3:26 PM
ary.bsky.social
the horrors, but alt text
Panel 1 of a comic Big block letters title it "The Horrors" Derek creeps by his smallest child. Derek, small aside: "Heheh." Derek: "I'm a sneaky dad, ha." Smallest child sits cross-legged, looking haughty. Child: "Nope." Child: "I see you. Nice try, tho." Panel 2 of a comic Derek stands with arms crossed. Derek: "Well, you won't that round." Derek, small aside: "Exhale" Derek, big block letters: "Labored sigh." Smallest child has opened their eyes and looks concerned. Child, small aside: "Um?" Child: "Everything okay, dad?" Panel 3 of a comic A caption reads "One hour later." Derek leans against a refrigerator with his arms crossed, looking distressed. Derek: "I can't unsee the horrors. It's engulfin' my brains." Derek: "I can't relate to folks blindly continuin' to follow the rules they expect to save us no more." Derek, small aside: "Snif." Derek: "Bein' aware of the reality of the situation is like a creepin' madness that's left me alienated. You know what I mean?" Smallest child is standing staring into a microwave. Smallest child: "Uh, no. I guess I don't know what you mean, but I'm a kid." The microwave makes big block letter sound effects: "Vrrrr" "Bing!" Panel 4 of a comic Derek stands, looking annoyed, gesturing disbelief with one hand and pointing at the smallest child with the other. Derek: "Hey, everybody! Check it out! This kid's blissfully unaware of the horrors." Smallest child sits with a cup on the arm of a chair, a plate on their lap, and a steaming hot pocket missing a bite in their hand which their cheeks are stuffed with. Smallest child, big block letters: "Ut!" Smallest child: "Hot hot pocket." Smallest child, small aside: "Chew." Derek: "Must be nice!" Derek, small aside: "Geez." Derek: "Sorry to bother you!"
January 17, 2026 at 4:38 AM
ary.bsky.social
Tomorrow (accessible):
A dark red poster with white text. "Portland Organizing Meeting" "Stop ICE terror" "Nationwide shut down Jan 20" "Sat, 01/17 3 pm" "Portland Liberation Center" In the middle of the poster snippets of protest signs are visible, chiefly one reading "The people demand ICE out of our communities / Party for Socialism and Liberation"
January 17, 2026 at 4:10 AM
ary.bsky.social
alt text'd!
Panel 1 of a comic Big block letters title the comic "Communion" Derek sits cross legged, holding his hands up emphatically as he speaks with an alien holding a tablet device. Derek: "Without childcare ain't nobody gonna hire you." The alien has a big block letter question mark above its head. Alien, small aside: "wtf." Derek, small aside: "Ahem." Derek: "But they ain't gonna pay you enough to afford it neither." In the background there are big block letter sound effects that say "Beep", "Zip", and "Zap". Panel 2 of a comic Derek is now sitting on the couch watching two of his children play videogames. The largest one stands behind the couch, the smallest one sits on the couch with their knees up. Both of their controllers are making small "Click clak!" sound effects, and there are big block letter "Beep" and "Zip" sound effects in the background. The alien stands beside Derek with its hand raised to its chin, looking concerned. Alien, small aside: "Um." Alien: "Is this a prank? The intergalactic census is important and very serious." Derek: "So, then you can't get no job. And if you ask for help folks yell 'Get a real job!'" Panel 3 of a comic The alien now sits beside Derek on the couch, sweating with confusion and touching its tablet with a small "Click". The largest child still plays videogames and their controller makes small "Click clak!" sound effects, along with bigger block letter "Zap!" and "Bip!" in the background. The smallest child has turned to face Derek and the Alien with the closed eyes of practiced speech. Derek: "Once you get caught in the parent snare it don't take much to become a human social safety net by default." Derek, small aside: "Snort." Alien: "Wat?" Largest child: "Dad does it all." Smallest child: "Driving, cooking, cleaning-" Smallest child: "Taking care of grandma," Smallest child: "He does it all for free." Panel 4 of a comic The alien now looks fed up. It sighs in big block letters. Alien, small aside: "Bro." Derek: "I grind, but I ain't allowed to be part of the formal economy." The largest child has left video games to drink a drink, with big block letter "Slurp" sound effects that are interrupted by a big block letter "Ding-dong!" The smallest child has turned backwards on the couch to look in the direction of the sound. Smallest child: "Sheriff's here to evict us again!"
January 12, 2026 at 3:49 PM
ary.bsky.social
Alt text
Panel 1 of a comic Big block letters title it "Hard Cope". Derek sits at a desk with pencil and paper, writing or drawing with a small "skrt!" sound effect. Derek: "Dang, I'm so glad I didn't quit doin' comics." Derek: "This is the best thing I can be doin' right now." Derek: "I'm really helping!" Panel 2 of a comic Derek turns from his desk to look behind himself with some concern. Derek, small aside: "Um." Smoke drifts in and there are big block letter sound effects in the background as follows: "Pow!" "Aaaa" "Blam!" "Rakka" "Bam" "Po" Panel 3 of a comic Derek sits normally again with his pencil ready, looking upward as if thinking or listening. The smoke has expanded and there are further big block letter sound effects as follows: "Blam" "Help!" "Wah!" "Pow" "Pow" "Ka-p" "Bam!" "Ba" Panel 4 of a comic Same as the previous panel but the ruckus has increased further. Big block letter sound effects as follows: "Ka-pow!" "Blam" "Pow" "Nooo!" "Pow" "Brakka" "Omg" "Bang" "Wtf!" "Bam" "Mommy!" "Run!" "Aaaa"
January 10, 2026 at 4:18 AM
ary.bsky.social
@tomwalker.bsky.social 🙉
Tom Walker getting owned by the thumbnails for his latest two VOD uploads being the exact same pose with a manic smile and his hands on either side of his head.
January 9, 2026 at 3:10 PM
ary.bsky.social
With alt text!

(Sorry "Derek's child", idk if you've ever been named)
Panel 1 of a comic Big block letters title it "World's Greatest Dad" Derek sits on a big comfy chair, slumped forward and looking defeated. Derek: "I don't feel bad about it no more." Derek: "Everythin's nonfunctional and stacked like Jenga with so much risk." Derek, small aside: "Snort!" In big block letters is a "Sigh" Panel 2 of a comic Derek leans back to look behind his seat with concern, as big block letters spell out a long "Aaaaagh!" and "Crash" in the background. Derek: "Failure's predestined." Derek: "Basically, success ain't possible. The system's built like that on purpose." Panel 3 of a comic Derek is up on his knees on the seat, looking over the back of it. There are many big block letters in the background "Ack!", "Grunt", "Ek", and "Eeek". Derek: "The failure ain't a bug, it's a feature. Built-in 'cuz it's so profitable. Late fees, payday loans, etc." Derek, small aside: "Heh" Derek: "But you're sold an idea of success that just ain't obtainable, so you keep on grindin'." Panel 4 of a comic Derek still kneels on the couch. Derek, in big block letters: "Sigh" Derek: "Geez. Are you even listenin' to me?" Derek, small aside: "Wait." In big block letters in the background, "Eek!", "Ooh ooh ah-ah ah!" Derek's child is struggling with a monkey. Derek's child, in big block letters: "Dad!" Derek: "Um, is—is that a monkey??" Derek's child: "Help!! She's feral!" Derek's child: "Gah!" The monkey chomps Derek's child's leg with a small "Chomp" sound effect.
January 9, 2026 at 4:26 AM
ary.bsky.social
It's almost 1pm and it still looks like this outside. I'm not sure I've ever seen such a persistent fog!
Some trees barely visible through thick fog
January 7, 2026 at 5:37 PM
ary.bsky.social
Now with alt text 😎
Panel 1 of a comic Derek sits at a desk, writing with pencil and paper. His shirt is a bit grimy and his tag is sticking out. He looks very quotidian. He is writing "Dear King Features Syndicate, I'm writing to submit my comic strip about me and my kids to be syndicated by your company to newspapers." Panel 2 comic Derek, now in profile, touches a hand to his chin thoughtfully while continuing to write. "Much like Funky Winkerbean or For Better or for Worse (the greatest comic of all time) my comics focus on the quotidian." Panel 3 of a comic Derek pauses writing to hold up his phone, which has a little notification saying "googles quotidian". Panel 4 of a comic Derek looks pleased and hums a musical note while going back to writing. "Also, even tho I'm a cranky old white dude I promise I won't take a hard right turn like that Dilbert guy."
January 6, 2026 at 2:11 AM