hannah
@awfuldumbass.bsky.social
classically trained bathroom attendant
Hello friends I am back on here just to say: if you see me reposting any of my old good/passable tweets from ages ago over on facebook I need you to please just look the other way and act like I’m not doing anything undignified or embarassing. I’m trying to trick a man into thinking I’m funny
October 23, 2025 at 5:22 PM
Hello friends I am back on here just to say: if you see me reposting any of my old good/passable tweets from ages ago over on facebook I need you to please just look the other way and act like I’m not doing anything undignified or embarassing. I’m trying to trick a man into thinking I’m funny
Love it when you meet a guy who has clearly just learned the phrase "stochastic terrorism" and who also clearly believes that it means "very bad terrorism"
October 4, 2025 at 7:40 PM
Love it when you meet a guy who has clearly just learned the phrase "stochastic terrorism" and who also clearly believes that it means "very bad terrorism"
there is something almost ostentatiously heterosexual about the facebook haha react
October 4, 2025 at 12:03 AM
there is something almost ostentatiously heterosexual about the facebook haha react
I've mostly given up on trying to be funny on here and rules. Now my Bluesky is just a home for all my dumb anodyne little thoughts for a 57-strong audience of my closest and dearest friends and also some people I barely know through the internet. Anyway,
October 2, 2025 at 1:32 AM
I've mostly given up on trying to be funny on here and rules. Now my Bluesky is just a home for all my dumb anodyne little thoughts for a 57-strong audience of my closest and dearest friends and also some people I barely know through the internet. Anyway,
The rumors are all true: I’ve bought a bracelet
October 1, 2025 at 6:42 PM
The rumors are all true: I’ve bought a bracelet
[guy whose parents got turned into soylent green] yeah i come from a blended family
October 1, 2025 at 2:32 AM
[guy whose parents got turned into soylent green] yeah i come from a blended family
Huge day for anybody who’s ever wondered what I’d look like as a Disney princess
October 1, 2025 at 12:09 AM
Huge day for anybody who’s ever wondered what I’d look like as a Disney princess
What's new with me is I've become obsessed with a specific type of spoonerism where you invert the first letters of each word in a phrase and still end up with real words. "Dust ruffle" becomes "rust duffle," "sonic youth" becomes "yonic south" (I'll allow it), "packing heat" becomes "hacking peat"
September 30, 2025 at 7:06 PM
What's new with me is I've become obsessed with a specific type of spoonerism where you invert the first letters of each word in a phrase and still end up with real words. "Dust ruffle" becomes "rust duffle," "sonic youth" becomes "yonic south" (I'll allow it), "packing heat" becomes "hacking peat"
I have taken a glamorous vacation to a restroom
September 29, 2025 at 10:30 PM
I have taken a glamorous vacation to a restroom
Reposted by hannah
Reposted by hannah
Don’t even talk to me until I’ve had my mid-day square
September 22, 2025 at 9:46 PM
Don’t even talk to me until I’ve had my mid-day square
real gs move in silence like the second h in hannah
September 22, 2025 at 8:24 PM
real gs move in silence like the second h in hannah
If I had a little angel and devil each sitting on my shoulder I'd probably slurp them up like tinned sardines and let them duke it out in my stomach
September 22, 2025 at 12:53 AM
If I had a little angel and devil each sitting on my shoulder I'd probably slurp them up like tinned sardines and let them duke it out in my stomach
He is listening to the new Cardiacs album
September 20, 2025 at 5:46 PM
He is listening to the new Cardiacs album
Unfortunately just read the word "michelada" and turned into the AA version of Jasper from Twilight when he smells somebody's papercut from eight miles away
September 19, 2025 at 2:41 AM
Unfortunately just read the word "michelada" and turned into the AA version of Jasper from Twilight when he smells somebody's papercut from eight miles away
Reposted by hannah
if Jimmy Kimmel's political humor is too hot for you to handle, I'm not sure "snowflake" even cuts it as a term of derision for the level of fragility you've achieved
September 17, 2025 at 11:00 PM
if Jimmy Kimmel's political humor is too hot for you to handle, I'm not sure "snowflake" even cuts it as a term of derision for the level of fragility you've achieved
Sweeney Todd: The Demon Chiropractor of Fleet Street
Resisting the temptation to tell online right-wingers to kill themselves by saying "go see a chiropractor" instead
September 17, 2025 at 10:16 PM
Sweeney Todd: The Demon Chiropractor of Fleet Street
Reposted by hannah
Trans rights are not the rights of a tiny minority, trans rights are everyone’s rights to self-determination, control of our bodies, and a society where opportunity and aesthetics are not restricted by sex assigned at birth
You should support and defend trans people because trans people are people
You should support and defend trans people because trans people are people
September 17, 2025 at 2:31 PM
Trans rights are not the rights of a tiny minority, trans rights are everyone’s rights to self-determination, control of our bodies, and a society where opportunity and aesthetics are not restricted by sex assigned at birth
You should support and defend trans people because trans people are people
You should support and defend trans people because trans people are people
Mad Max: Drury Lane
September 17, 2025 at 2:26 AM
Mad Max: Drury Lane
Being my friend is a pleasure and a joy and I really don't understand why more people don't do it
September 16, 2025 at 9:24 PM
Being my friend is a pleasure and a joy and I really don't understand why more people don't do it
there's just something indecent about a crescent moon
September 16, 2025 at 4:11 AM
there's just something indecent about a crescent moon
vulture dropped its 2025 list of comedians you should know today so it's a great time to check in with your friends who are constitutionally unhappy and bitter
September 15, 2025 at 11:10 PM
vulture dropped its 2025 list of comedians you should know today so it's a great time to check in with your friends who are constitutionally unhappy and bitter
genuine question can you say "suicide vest" on facebook
wearing a life vest and a suicide vest at the same time to see if they cancel each other out
September 15, 2025 at 10:05 PM
genuine question can you say "suicide vest" on facebook
Resisting the temptation to tell online right-wingers to kill themselves by saying "go see a chiropractor" instead
September 15, 2025 at 4:57 AM
Resisting the temptation to tell online right-wingers to kill themselves by saying "go see a chiropractor" instead
I think I'm starting to get sick of my fake last name
September 15, 2025 at 4:11 AM
I think I'm starting to get sick of my fake last name