Ben Funk-Holladay
@bfunkholladay.bsky.social
If any company were truly serious about making the best butter they would call their product Buttest.
December 15, 2025 at 12:47 AM
If any company were truly serious about making the best butter they would call their product Buttest.
It must be so stressful to be in an SNL opening sketch. They're probably all afraid they're going to say, "Live from New York, it's Saturnight day!"
December 15, 2025 at 12:44 AM
It must be so stressful to be in an SNL opening sketch. They're probably all afraid they're going to say, "Live from New York, it's Saturnight day!"
Since Nathan Fielder is now a pilot, believing in a flat Earth requires believing he's in on it, which somehow makes the theory more credible because if there's one guy who could pull a cover up that big off it's him.
November 3, 2025 at 2:14 PM
Since Nathan Fielder is now a pilot, believing in a flat Earth requires believing he's in on it, which somehow makes the theory more credible because if there's one guy who could pull a cover up that big off it's him.
Horror movies love a boxy house with huge windows.
October 27, 2025 at 3:05 AM
Horror movies love a boxy house with huge windows.
Johnny Cash was such a coward for not ending his cover of "Hurt" with a straight minute of speaker feedback.
October 7, 2025 at 1:12 AM
Johnny Cash was such a coward for not ending his cover of "Hurt" with a straight minute of speaker feedback.
If anyone had ever truly been serious about being a director or photographer they would have worn an eyepatch all the time to adapt to seeing the world in 2D so they could better compose their shots.
September 28, 2025 at 5:16 PM
If anyone had ever truly been serious about being a director or photographer they would have worn an eyepatch all the time to adapt to seeing the world in 2D so they could better compose their shots.
Most fiction is like, "We can't let them pave this beautiful nature to create a highway," while Death Stranding is like, "Have you considered that you actually want to fuck a highway?"
July 19, 2025 at 12:27 AM
Most fiction is like, "We can't let them pave this beautiful nature to create a highway," while Death Stranding is like, "Have you considered that you actually want to fuck a highway?"
I wonder if when @heathercampbell.bsky.social and Mary Laws leave for work they say, "Time to go write Ricken and Morty."
July 16, 2025 at 7:49 PM
I wonder if when @heathercampbell.bsky.social and Mary Laws leave for work they say, "Time to go write Ricken and Morty."
It was such a great comedic choice to make the one named Butt-Head more of the straight man of the duo.
July 16, 2025 at 7:40 PM
It was such a great comedic choice to make the one named Butt-Head more of the straight man of the duo.
I want a @sonyplaystation.bsky.social 1st party dating game like @dateeverythinggame.bsky.social where you can date PlayStation consoles. It can be called PS I Love You.
June 28, 2025 at 9:21 PM
I want a @sonyplaystation.bsky.social 1st party dating game like @dateeverythinggame.bsky.social where you can date PlayStation consoles. It can be called PS I Love You.
The jock Air Bud bullying the nerd Wishbone: "Ain't no rule that says a dog can't kick your ass."
May 22, 2025 at 7:30 PM
The jock Air Bud bullying the nerd Wishbone: "Ain't no rule that says a dog can't kick your ass."
I keep seeing people say why did the universe give Biden cancer and not Trump, but there's no way Trump would announce it if he had cancer, so there's always hope that he has it and we just don't know it.
May 19, 2025 at 2:23 AM
I keep seeing people say why did the universe give Biden cancer and not Trump, but there's no way Trump would announce it if he had cancer, so there's always hope that he has it and we just don't know it.
Robert Pattison playing a guy named Edward is practically the exact same thing as SpongeBob Patrickson playing a guy named Squidward.
May 18, 2025 at 2:28 AM
Robert Pattison playing a guy named Edward is practically the exact same thing as SpongeBob Patrickson playing a guy named Squidward.
Clubs are definitely the Ringo of card suits. Idk about the others. Maybe Spades are John, Diamonds are Paul and Hearts are George. You could make arguments for those 3 to go different ways, but Clubs are 100% Ringo.
May 14, 2025 at 8:02 PM
Clubs are definitely the Ringo of card suits. Idk about the others. Maybe Spades are John, Diamonds are Paul and Hearts are George. You could make arguments for those 3 to go different ways, but Clubs are 100% Ringo.
As a lover of both pickles and wordplay I'm begging my communities to find a second joke beyond the fact that dill sounds like deal.
May 6, 2025 at 7:31 PM
As a lover of both pickles and wordplay I'm begging my communities to find a second joke beyond the fact that dill sounds like deal.
I'm really worried that I'm going to be selected to be the next pope. I mean how am I supposed to fit that in with everything else I have going on in life?
April 25, 2025 at 9:05 AM
I'm really worried that I'm going to be selected to be the next pope. I mean how am I supposed to fit that in with everything else I have going on in life?
Happy 4/20 to Americans who spent the whole day smoking pot, and happy 20/4 to Europeans who spent the day binge watching the Kiefer Sutherland show 24.
April 21, 2025 at 12:16 AM
Happy 4/20 to Americans who spent the whole day smoking pot, and happy 20/4 to Europeans who spent the day binge watching the Kiefer Sutherland show 24.
The closer in age I get to 38 the more my burp sounds like Homer's.
April 11, 2025 at 1:43 AM
The closer in age I get to 38 the more my burp sounds like Homer's.
The great thing about Bluesky is I've been here for months and I've only ever seen 1 skeet that mentioned Zack Snyder and it wasn't even about him.
March 28, 2025 at 4:42 PM
The great thing about Bluesky is I've been here for months and I've only ever seen 1 skeet that mentioned Zack Snyder and it wasn't even about him.
Jihanki means vending machine in Japanese so if there was a sentient Japanese vending machine who was also a redneck rapper they could go by the name G-Honky.
March 20, 2025 at 3:48 PM
Jihanki means vending machine in Japanese so if there was a sentient Japanese vending machine who was also a redneck rapper they could go by the name G-Honky.
Death Note but instead of L it's Elle Woods from Legally Blonde.
March 15, 2025 at 6:58 PM
Death Note but instead of L it's Elle Woods from Legally Blonde.
When Elon Musk arrives in the afterlife, Nikola Tesla will get to spend the first 4 billion years electrocuting his ghost testicles.
March 14, 2025 at 7:20 PM
When Elon Musk arrives in the afterlife, Nikola Tesla will get to spend the first 4 billion years electrocuting his ghost testicles.
I haven't watched any of the live action Disney remakes, but every time a new one is shown you guys get super upset and I'm always just thinking why are you wasting your energy? They aren't going to stop making these unless they stop making money.
March 14, 2025 at 1:03 PM
I haven't watched any of the live action Disney remakes, but every time a new one is shown you guys get super upset and I'm always just thinking why are you wasting your energy? They aren't going to stop making these unless they stop making money.
If you're a nonbinary person who loves to fuck you could tell people you're a jack, because you're not a king, you're not a queen, and you're definitely not an ace.
March 8, 2025 at 2:41 PM
If you're a nonbinary person who loves to fuck you could tell people you're a jack, because you're not a king, you're not a queen, and you're definitely not an ace.
Reposted by Ben Funk-Holladay
i wish johnny cash had lived to see chappell roan, his cover of "pink pony club" would have been phenomenal
March 7, 2025 at 2:15 PM
i wish johnny cash had lived to see chappell roan, his cover of "pink pony club" would have been phenomenal