Matthew Jacobsen
@cbmatt8.bsky.social
Has award winning jokes my mother should never hear.
Reposted by Matthew Jacobsen
Finally added textchat for PCs and decided to put the NPC-voice on it. Now the character creator lets you pick from different voices, adjust pitch, etc.
It reminds me of my 10 yo self playing Phantasy Star Online alone. Chatting it up with NPCs like a sad dweeb.
#GameDev #IndieDev #Unity3D
It reminds me of my 10 yo self playing Phantasy Star Online alone. Chatting it up with NPCs like a sad dweeb.
#GameDev #IndieDev #Unity3D
August 12, 2025 at 3:06 AM
DSM has no fewer than 4 Matts in the comedy scene (there's regular turnover) and every year, I propose a purge.
August 1, 2025 at 9:58 PM
DSM has no fewer than 4 Matts in the comedy scene (there's regular turnover) and every year, I propose a purge.
May 15, 2025 at 8:16 PM
No one benefits more from me being intoxicated more than my cat.
March 11, 2025 at 12:43 AM
No one benefits more from me being intoxicated more than my cat.
Every time a comedy show pays me by check, I run it under my nose and loudly give it a sniff.
That needs to stop.
That needs to stop.
February 23, 2025 at 5:55 AM
Every time a comedy show pays me by check, I run it under my nose and loudly give it a sniff.
That needs to stop.
That needs to stop.
I’ve been having fun being an idiot lately.
February 3, 2025 at 10:38 PM
I’ve been having fun being an idiot lately.
Me with the nephews when a parent/grandparent is around: fun uncle.
Me with the nephews when I’m watching them: jaded beat cop.
Me with the nephews when I’m watching them: jaded beat cop.
January 21, 2025 at 6:46 PM
Me with the nephews when a parent/grandparent is around: fun uncle.
Me with the nephews when I’m watching them: jaded beat cop.
Me with the nephews when I’m watching them: jaded beat cop.
All my sweatshirts require hoods.
I need a blanket for my scalp.
I need a blanket for my scalp.
December 14, 2024 at 5:52 PM
All my sweatshirts require hoods.
I need a blanket for my scalp.
I need a blanket for my scalp.
Got 20 minutes out of town for a gig and had to backtrack because I forgot my jean jacket.
Is it necessary? Yes.
It is a magic talisman that gives me my mojo. Without it, I’ll get a toe cramp, trip on words and poop my pants.
I can perform under two of the three symptoms, but not all at once.
Is it necessary? Yes.
It is a magic talisman that gives me my mojo. Without it, I’ll get a toe cramp, trip on words and poop my pants.
I can perform under two of the three symptoms, but not all at once.
December 13, 2024 at 7:23 PM
Got 20 minutes out of town for a gig and had to backtrack because I forgot my jean jacket.
Is it necessary? Yes.
It is a magic talisman that gives me my mojo. Without it, I’ll get a toe cramp, trip on words and poop my pants.
I can perform under two of the three symptoms, but not all at once.
Is it necessary? Yes.
It is a magic talisman that gives me my mojo. Without it, I’ll get a toe cramp, trip on words and poop my pants.
I can perform under two of the three symptoms, but not all at once.
Think of the hardest working person you PERSONALLY know.
In whatever criteria your definition requires.
Whether that’s via physical labor, multiple jobs, sacrifices made, effectiveness in creating change, etc.
Estimate their net worth and we’ll use it as the standard. 1/2
In whatever criteria your definition requires.
Whether that’s via physical labor, multiple jobs, sacrifices made, effectiveness in creating change, etc.
Estimate their net worth and we’ll use it as the standard. 1/2
December 6, 2024 at 6:21 PM
Think of the hardest working person you PERSONALLY know.
In whatever criteria your definition requires.
Whether that’s via physical labor, multiple jobs, sacrifices made, effectiveness in creating change, etc.
Estimate their net worth and we’ll use it as the standard. 1/2
In whatever criteria your definition requires.
Whether that’s via physical labor, multiple jobs, sacrifices made, effectiveness in creating change, etc.
Estimate their net worth and we’ll use it as the standard. 1/2
Someone tried debating me on Stargate vs Star Trek and I told him to go home and watch NCIS: Portal.
I felt pretty good about that one.
I felt pretty good about that one.
December 5, 2024 at 8:46 PM
Someone tried debating me on Stargate vs Star Trek and I told him to go home and watch NCIS: Portal.
I felt pretty good about that one.
I felt pretty good about that one.
Returned from the thrift store as a new man. 🤠
November 26, 2024 at 4:30 PM
Returned from the thrift store as a new man. 🤠
Winning a stand up comedy contest is a very unique thing where you literally talk people into giving you an award.
November 25, 2024 at 10:43 PM
Winning a stand up comedy contest is a very unique thing where you literally talk people into giving you an award.
Fun (really happened) fact: I got my four year degree from the same place where I went to preschool.
I guess I just really liked the results from the first time around.
I guess I just really liked the results from the first time around.
November 25, 2024 at 10:41 PM
Fun (really happened) fact: I got my four year degree from the same place where I went to preschool.
I guess I just really liked the results from the first time around.
I guess I just really liked the results from the first time around.
*Reading a boomer FB post about processed foods*
“There are all kinds of scary ingredients in US foods that are banned around the world!”
Yes!
“Something needs to be done!”
Yes! So tougher corporate regulatio-
“I hope RFK Jr. dissolves the FDA!”
…w-…what?
“There are all kinds of scary ingredients in US foods that are banned around the world!”
Yes!
“Something needs to be done!”
Yes! So tougher corporate regulatio-
“I hope RFK Jr. dissolves the FDA!”
…w-…what?
November 19, 2024 at 6:57 PM
*Reading a boomer FB post about processed foods*
“There are all kinds of scary ingredients in US foods that are banned around the world!”
Yes!
“Something needs to be done!”
Yes! So tougher corporate regulatio-
“I hope RFK Jr. dissolves the FDA!”
…w-…what?
“There are all kinds of scary ingredients in US foods that are banned around the world!”
Yes!
“Something needs to be done!”
Yes! So tougher corporate regulatio-
“I hope RFK Jr. dissolves the FDA!”
…w-…what?
I've never seen the show 911, but I always assumed it was a serious drama like ER. Then my algorithm sent me a video of a harmonica stuck in a woman's mouth and a chest that caved in on a frozen guy- No one told me it was a body horror cartoon.
November 18, 2024 at 6:00 PM
I've never seen the show 911, but I always assumed it was a serious drama like ER. Then my algorithm sent me a video of a harmonica stuck in a woman's mouth and a chest that caved in on a frozen guy- No one told me it was a body horror cartoon.
I saw a comment expressing distaste at the idea of a female protagonist for the new vr Alien video game.
Sir, what uh, what do you know about the Alien franchise?
Sir, what uh, what do you know about the Alien franchise?
November 18, 2024 at 5:49 PM
I saw a comment expressing distaste at the idea of a female protagonist for the new vr Alien video game.
Sir, what uh, what do you know about the Alien franchise?
Sir, what uh, what do you know about the Alien franchise?
I’ve just come to accept that my role on this planet is to decide for all my close friends and family what restaurant we’re eating at.
November 16, 2024 at 11:44 PM
I’ve just come to accept that my role on this planet is to decide for all my close friends and family what restaurant we’re eating at.
Life hack: if you ever want to inflict revenge on a cashier, use your debit card and get cash back so it shoots the register drawer into their spleen.
November 16, 2024 at 11:40 PM
Life hack: if you ever want to inflict revenge on a cashier, use your debit card and get cash back so it shoots the register drawer into their spleen.
Midwesterners hate revolving doors because they don’t know how to hold them open for the guy behind them.
November 16, 2024 at 11:35 PM
Midwesterners hate revolving doors because they don’t know how to hold them open for the guy behind them.
I missed the train when Vine was new. And after seeing what the Vine-to-Netflix-boxing-match pipeline is capable of, I will no longer be missing out on social media fads. Hello, Bluesky.
November 15, 2024 at 7:29 PM
I missed the train when Vine was new. And after seeing what the Vine-to-Netflix-boxing-match pipeline is capable of, I will no longer be missing out on social media fads. Hello, Bluesky.