Flaccid, Ernest, flaaaaacciiiiiid

Oh wait it's a bar bar. Slaying all by yourself missy?

Werq it diva! Sissy that breakfast bar

It could change your life

And you have to cultivate a degree of delulu to succeed in art. I'm happy to talk art and self-publishing any time; success for me means connection. Making art is about connecting with people, and success in the arts means connection with more people! Decide what success means to you and achieve it.

And reach out to people who have had success, creatively, commercially, and ask them stuff! I have many times. I have the type of delulu where I assume any other artist is my peer, my equal, and I can say hello and they'll reply. Those that don't are missing out.

Or, make something that will sell big, maybe it will. But if you're not living off the proceeds of your art, don't feel you're failing. MOST ARTISTS ARE NOT MAKING A LIVING FROM THEIR ART! Only a tiny percentage do. Make what you love and enjoy the process, don't judge yourself by financial success.

And self publish! Publishers are not looking to make you rich, or even keep a roof over your head, they're hoping for the occasional hit title or author for minimal financial risk, and they focus their resources on their popular creators. You don't need their seal of approval.

Write the thing that is too scary, too big, too much for now, the thing publishers won't touch. Write the thing you can't publish until your parents are dead. The thing that makes your heart pound when you imagine holding it in your hands, finished, irretrievably OUT THERE.

I didn't expect writing graphic novels about intoxicated men spiralling to be popular, but there is a huge demand for adult, challenging comics that reach beyond entertainment. My comics are collected by museums, libraries, universities and galleries. Not because of the art, because of the stories.

So make your comics ABOUT SOMETHING THAT MATTERS! Scream from your core and your tribe will join the cacophony. Whatever you feel inside, whatever you've experienced, whatever frustrates, hurts or humiliates you, is felt by millions of people who are aching for someone to say it.

Tetanus from that rusty spike, I should think.

Oh I remember this, and the sequel, The Celery Stalks At Midnight.

Time you enjoyed wasting was not wasted at all