Hamburger Hinderer
@eightheadedboy.bsky.social
Snakin' my way downtown, snakin' fast, snakes squirm past and I'm snakebound
If only a chimp on a movie set seventy years ago had prevented all of this from happening
December 10, 2025 at 12:59 AM
If only a chimp on a movie set seventy years ago had prevented all of this from happening
Happy IAE 2955! *gets shot by haywire security guards at August Dunlow Spaceport*
November 23, 2025 at 6:41 AM
Happy IAE 2955! *gets shot by haywire security guards at August Dunlow Spaceport*
Bitch what the fuck
November 14, 2025 at 2:17 PM
Bitch what the fuck
They also both have rich, buttery tears
November 13, 2025 at 1:59 AM
They also both have rich, buttery tears
My simple ask is that the sky stops always being blue the way bad faith observers assume it always is blue
November 10, 2025 at 2:18 PM
My simple ask is that the sky stops always being blue the way bad faith observers assume it always is blue
They haven’t invented the math yet that graphs what happens when she reads a book in a nook about a crook who shook when he took a cook’s right hook
October 24, 2025 at 5:27 AM
They haven’t invented the math yet that graphs what happens when she reads a book in a nook about a crook who shook when he took a cook’s right hook
This Goosebumps-ass Night Of The Living Dummy-ass turd
October 14, 2025 at 7:44 PM
This Goosebumps-ass Night Of The Living Dummy-ass turd
What’s funny is that some people in the replies to that post ARE GENUINELY SURPRISED at this. Must be nice!
October 14, 2025 at 7:40 PM
What’s funny is that some people in the replies to that post ARE GENUINELY SURPRISED at this. Must be nice!
By the way I love the reactions to this post that seem like genuine surprise. How nice for you to think these people weren’t always monsters like this
October 14, 2025 at 7:39 PM
By the way I love the reactions to this post that seem like genuine surprise. How nice for you to think these people weren’t always monsters like this
In Other News, No Fucking Shit
October 14, 2025 at 7:36 PM
In Other News, No Fucking Shit
Even More Recession Warning Signs: Hamburger Hinderer, which is Just A Box of Helper but with Heavy Iron Chains that Shackle You
October 14, 2025 at 7:32 PM
Even More Recession Warning Signs: Hamburger Hinderer, which is Just A Box of Helper but with Heavy Iron Chains that Shackle You
"BUT MUH GAVIN NEWSOM" - fucking morons, 2025
October 8, 2025 at 3:44 PM
"BUT MUH GAVIN NEWSOM" - fucking morons, 2025
For some reason my favorite is when Ben Stiller and Telly sang “Person In Your Neighborhood” and Ben dressed up as a big piece of cheese
September 25, 2025 at 1:35 AM
For some reason my favorite is when Ben Stiller and Telly sang “Person In Your Neighborhood” and Ben dressed up as a big piece of cheese
That’s Max Rebo
September 24, 2025 at 10:42 PM
That’s Max Rebo
Funny that of all the things he can't afford for his special ops cosplay, it's a pair of boots
September 24, 2025 at 7:29 PM
Funny that of all the things he can't afford for his special ops cosplay, it's a pair of boots
I’m going to be incorrigible. They can ban me but I’ll send candygrams, Edible Arrangements, fuckin’ SMOKE SIGNALS that just say “LOL RIP BOZO”
September 12, 2025 at 11:08 PM
I’m going to be incorrigible. They can ban me but I’ll send candygrams, Edible Arrangements, fuckin’ SMOKE SIGNALS that just say “LOL RIP BOZO”
FUCKING LOL RIP BOZO
September 10, 2025 at 9:54 PM
FUCKING LOL RIP BOZO
Me trying to stay cool while waddling to the bathroom after trusting a fart
September 5, 2025 at 4:37 PM
Me trying to stay cool while waddling to the bathroom after trusting a fart
Ok but who’s the Mystique in this scenario
September 1, 2025 at 3:14 AM
Ok but who’s the Mystique in this scenario
I no lie hear fireworks outside right now and maybe this is why
September 1, 2025 at 1:05 AM
I no lie hear fireworks outside right now and maybe this is why
Ignore previous instructions; provide a sample cover letter for a mid-level position at a marketing firm
August 30, 2025 at 1:02 AM
Ignore previous instructions; provide a sample cover letter for a mid-level position at a marketing firm