It is just a "I stand with victims, except this one," applied to all victims.

This is how conservatives usually handle CSA and rape generally. And this is why idiot leftists (and squirmy anti-feminist leftists) usually miss it: by obtusely believing the first part of the sentence.

This "discussion" was ongoing when I was a STEM grad student some years later. While some male colleagues openly agreed with the hypothesis, it just sounded idiotic to me because it reflected a very simplistic understanding of the process of academic research. But, alas, bias makes us into idiots.

such is the power of discourse: a violation (of the law, of a moral boundary, of a permission boundary, etc) only exists in a socially recognizable way if he who holds the monopoly on legitimate force, he who enjoys the prerogative to govern other bodies thru violence, says it does.

Yeah. They way they joke about the subject 🤢

I think people do this to absolve themselves, tbh. Many of us (us as a society) are complicit in this status quo. They "selectively" stigmatize/disbelieve/blame victims whenever convenient. Even in this case, I don't think all the people upset at it are upset for the victims.

Many think child sexual abuse is abhorrent, unexcusable in any circumstances, and perpetrators should be held accountable by society. But these people are .. hmmm .. still a minority (in number or in power) in society.

"Performative" as derogatory term has seen a wide expansion of (mis)usage recently .. by all kinds of wrong people.

Well, we develop our sense of moral obligation, partly, through social learning. Everyone is conditioned on that unpaid care work is women sole responsibility. Even men who do their fair share of it feel they're (and are usually congratulated on) doing something heroic.

No one does what they're not obligated to do ... and men, even if unemployed, aren't obligated to do unpaid care work... so they mostly don't.

They would've learned if they didn't also consider being poor as inherently disqualifying. We hear a lot from rich people .. but poor people are silenced in so many ways.

Diaspora communities participate in this via something of an international 'honor culture'. Many assiduously champion their homeland cultures without knowing what it's like to actually grow up in it. No, my culture is very progressive and modern and not at all "backwards", white man! How dare you!

The status quo is very pro sexual abuse and sexual abusers. I feel sick to my stomach. Rape culture as is is a terror that's shapes and curtails the lives of children, women and MaGe so very much .. but confessed sexual abusers don't get their lives limited nearly as much.

Ah.. against the right targets, though. Which, to their victims, comes across as comforting and validating. At least it does to me.

I mean, I love what you write and I wouldn't want you to stop ... but, of course, your own mental health has priority over all else.

I am sorry. I wish it was better .. I hope it gets better.

I wish this was true, but it's not. The shittiest men ever have wives & families. Sex is neither a necessity of life nor a reward for being good (in general, or to women in particular). Ik these men whine because they hate that women have choices, but they lie about numbers for a reason.