Emily Engelhardt
@etengelhardt.bsky.social
Physical Therapist, mom to two boys, former roller derby athlete, allergic to fun
I love Lady Bridgerton in that I am both vexed by my sons and I, as a married woman, still say things to my mother than make her do spit takes.
a woman wearing a tiara and a necklace is smiling for the camera .
ALT: a woman wearing a tiara and a necklace is smiling for the camera .
media.tenor.com
February 6, 2026 at 3:00 AM
I love Lady Bridgerton in that I am both vexed by my sons and I, as a married woman, still say things to my mother than make her do spit takes.
Watching the new season of Bridgerton: Everyone knows reformed rakes make the best husbands
Me: hashtag facts
Matt: WHAT
Me: hashtag facts
Matt: WHAT
February 4, 2026 at 2:49 AM
Watching the new season of Bridgerton: Everyone knows reformed rakes make the best husbands
Me: hashtag facts
Matt: WHAT
Me: hashtag facts
Matt: WHAT
Worked today and only had a couple of panicked moments out in my CR-V. Had to remind myself that in 2010 I drove to clinicals in more snow than this in a Toyota Camry.
January 28, 2026 at 2:17 AM
Worked today and only had a couple of panicked moments out in my CR-V. Had to remind myself that in 2010 I drove to clinicals in more snow than this in a Toyota Camry.
I am trying to make a grocery list for my weekly grocery shopping tomorrow but what I hear is that there is Nothing at the grocery store and how do I plan what to make for dinner if I don’t know I’ll be able to buy anything?!
January 24, 2026 at 2:39 AM
I am trying to make a grocery list for my weekly grocery shopping tomorrow but what I hear is that there is Nothing at the grocery store and how do I plan what to make for dinner if I don’t know I’ll be able to buy anything?!
I asked Wally if he would run errands with me tomorrow and he was reticent until I suggested A Little Treat might be in the cards and now he’s pumped and also I feel confident he’s mine.
January 17, 2026 at 2:03 AM
I asked Wally if he would run errands with me tomorrow and he was reticent until I suggested A Little Treat might be in the cards and now he’s pumped and also I feel confident he’s mine.
Wally and his friend declared a song from Joseph and the Amazing Technicolor Dreamcoat “cringe” and I don’t know how to break it to you kids, you’re decided to do musical theatre, it’s all cringe.
January 10, 2026 at 7:13 PM
Wally and his friend declared a song from Joseph and the Amazing Technicolor Dreamcoat “cringe” and I don’t know how to break it to you kids, you’re decided to do musical theatre, it’s all cringe.
I have threatened my son that if he does not start demonstrating some table manners I will sign him up for Barclay class and explained them to him in excruciating detail.
January 7, 2026 at 11:53 PM
I have threatened my son that if he does not start demonstrating some table manners I will sign him up for Barclay class and explained them to him in excruciating detail.
I would like to know where I can find Big Anise and have them stop ruining teas I get.
January 5, 2026 at 11:32 PM
I would like to know where I can find Big Anise and have them stop ruining teas I get.
Me, having viewed like 100,000 hours of “The Thundermans”: is the fact they keep Dr.Closso as a pet bunny a kidnapping/human rights violation?
Matt, who has also watched too much “The Thundermans”: you’ve officially put more thought into this than anyone writing on this show.
Matt, who has also watched too much “The Thundermans”: you’ve officially put more thought into this than anyone writing on this show.
January 5, 2026 at 9:17 PM
Me, having viewed like 100,000 hours of “The Thundermans”: is the fact they keep Dr.Closso as a pet bunny a kidnapping/human rights violation?
Matt, who has also watched too much “The Thundermans”: you’ve officially put more thought into this than anyone writing on this show.
Matt, who has also watched too much “The Thundermans”: you’ve officially put more thought into this than anyone writing on this show.
“Wally, do you want to learn about covered bridges?”
“No.”
“Too bad.”
In case you’re curious what I’m like as a parent.
“No.”
“Too bad.”
In case you’re curious what I’m like as a parent.
a woman in a pink jacket says i 'm not like a regular mom
ALT: a woman in a pink jacket says i 'm not like a regular mom
media.tenor.com
January 1, 2026 at 10:56 PM
“Wally, do you want to learn about covered bridges?”
“No.”
“Too bad.”
In case you’re curious what I’m like as a parent.
“No.”
“Too bad.”
In case you’re curious what I’m like as a parent.
Santa came and went and my children are still not asleep
December 25, 2025 at 4:30 AM
Santa came and went and my children are still not asleep
Me: Looking at the drafts coming from the writer’s room so far, I’m not sure 2026 is shaping up to be a good season. The plot is a stretch and they’re really digging up some old characters here.
Matt: When they start running out of plot ideas usually the writers just add another kid.
Matt: When they start running out of plot ideas usually the writers just add another kid.
December 16, 2025 at 1:39 PM
Me: Looking at the drafts coming from the writer’s room so far, I’m not sure 2026 is shaping up to be a good season. The plot is a stretch and they’re really digging up some old characters here.
Matt: When they start running out of plot ideas usually the writers just add another kid.
Matt: When they start running out of plot ideas usually the writers just add another kid.
It’s only Monday and this is where I am at so far.
a ground squirrel standing on its hind legs on a wooden railing
ALT: a ground squirrel standing on its hind legs on a wooden railing
media.tenor.com
December 15, 2025 at 10:54 PM
It’s only Monday and this is where I am at so far.
When they pick up our recycling this week the neighbors are going to think we had a rager because of all the empty cans…I guess you can call “dumping expired cans out from the basement fridge” a snowy evening rager.
December 14, 2025 at 12:58 AM
When they pick up our recycling this week the neighbors are going to think we had a rager because of all the empty cans…I guess you can call “dumping expired cans out from the basement fridge” a snowy evening rager.
It is snowing outside. Things that need to happen outside of my house have happened. This is my plan for the rest of the day.
December 13, 2025 at 8:04 PM
It is snowing outside. Things that need to happen outside of my house have happened. This is my plan for the rest of the day.
I don’t care if you’re putting up a nativity scene or advent wreath, you people are still putting up Christmas decorations before Thanksgiving and that is too early.
November 22, 2025 at 7:47 PM
I don’t care if you’re putting up a nativity scene or advent wreath, you people are still putting up Christmas decorations before Thanksgiving and that is too early.
Having the sort of week where I’m going to start masking not because I’m worried about viral spread but because I’m worried about the spread of my inside thoughts to the facial expression on the lower half of my face.
November 5, 2025 at 9:58 PM
Having the sort of week where I’m going to start masking not because I’m worried about viral spread but because I’m worried about the spread of my inside thoughts to the facial expression on the lower half of my face.
Me: you cannot eat M&Ms and practice piano at the same time, Wally
Also me: completing documentation while supervising religious education homework/piano practicing and sending my husband Reels on IG.
Do as I say, not as I do.
Also me: completing documentation while supervising religious education homework/piano practicing and sending my husband Reels on IG.
Do as I say, not as I do.
November 4, 2025 at 2:40 AM
Me: you cannot eat M&Ms and practice piano at the same time, Wally
Also me: completing documentation while supervising religious education homework/piano practicing and sending my husband Reels on IG.
Do as I say, not as I do.
Also me: completing documentation while supervising religious education homework/piano practicing and sending my husband Reels on IG.
Do as I say, not as I do.
Matt is watching A Man on the Inside and me, the person who works in geriatrics, has thoughts:
THIS IS GOOD BUT WHERE ARE THE ROLLATORS
THIS IS GOOD BUT WHERE ARE THE ROLLATORS
October 23, 2025 at 1:22 AM
Matt is watching A Man on the Inside and me, the person who works in geriatrics, has thoughts:
THIS IS GOOD BUT WHERE ARE THE ROLLATORS
THIS IS GOOD BUT WHERE ARE THE ROLLATORS
School makes this mistake with me once every 4 years, if there are not bones protruding through skin I will let whoever calls me know in no uncertain terms to call the other parent next time
"Hello, this is your kid’s school calling. So, your kid said her daddy dropped her off today. I could still see him if I stepped outside, but I know it’s much more convenient for you to take this call."
This Is Your Kid’s School and Even Though the Emergency Contact Form Lists Your Husband, We Need You, the Mom
Hello, this is your kid’s school calling. So, your kid said her daddy dropped her off today. I could still see him if I stepped outside, but I know...
buff.ly
October 18, 2025 at 1:58 AM
School makes this mistake with me once every 4 years, if there are not bones protruding through skin I will let whoever calls me know in no uncertain terms to call the other parent next time
Movie I am writing: Christine Baranksi is a tough as nails straight woman and Hugh Jackman is Wolverine but they periodically break into song and dance and then resume the main storyline as though nothing has happened
October 17, 2025 at 11:16 PM
Movie I am writing: Christine Baranksi is a tough as nails straight woman and Hugh Jackman is Wolverine but they periodically break into song and dance and then resume the main storyline as though nothing has happened
Tried to explain to the dog there is a middle ground between his current “passed out on the floor” and the “Florida man on meth” energy he has had since I got home from work. He is not interested in middle grounds.
October 4, 2025 at 2:01 AM
Tried to explain to the dog there is a middle ground between his current “passed out on the floor” and the “Florida man on meth” energy he has had since I got home from work. He is not interested in middle grounds.
Sometimes when I find my job tiring I remember that there’s a lot of jobs I could get where I’d have to have a Social Media Presence other than just grousing periodically on Bluesky and I decide my current job is actually great.
October 1, 2025 at 12:31 AM
Sometimes when I find my job tiring I remember that there’s a lot of jobs I could get where I’d have to have a Social Media Presence other than just grousing periodically on Bluesky and I decide my current job is actually great.
“Skin color hasn’t mattered since like, 2000”—my 9 year old, who I apparently need to do a little more discussion about race with.
September 5, 2025 at 12:01 AM
“Skin color hasn’t mattered since like, 2000”—my 9 year old, who I apparently need to do a little more discussion about race with.
I have had control of the remote for two nights in a row
Last night: where can I watch all of the Ina Garten?
Me: I could go for a cult documentary. Oooh, let’s watch this documentary about the conservatorship of Bam Margera!
Matt is never letting me control the television ever again.
Last night: where can I watch all of the Ina Garten?
Me: I could go for a cult documentary. Oooh, let’s watch this documentary about the conservatorship of Bam Margera!
Matt is never letting me control the television ever again.
August 28, 2025 at 2:13 AM
I have had control of the remote for two nights in a row
Last night: where can I watch all of the Ina Garten?
Me: I could go for a cult documentary. Oooh, let’s watch this documentary about the conservatorship of Bam Margera!
Matt is never letting me control the television ever again.
Last night: where can I watch all of the Ina Garten?
Me: I could go for a cult documentary. Oooh, let’s watch this documentary about the conservatorship of Bam Margera!
Matt is never letting me control the television ever again.