This poor lil cricket is 100% terrified of me esp considering I just stuck my phone in its face for pics
I went to find it before I went inside and BAM gone again, never located
BAM fears of cricket in my pants reinstated
I don't know how our hunter ancestors survived this adrenaline
I went to find it before I went inside and BAM gone again, never located
BAM fears of cricket in my pants reinstated
I don't know how our hunter ancestors survived this adrenaline
September 28, 2025 at 3:11 AM
This poor lil cricket is 100% terrified of me esp considering I just stuck my phone in its face for pics
I went to find it before I went inside and BAM gone again, never located
BAM fears of cricket in my pants reinstated
I don't know how our hunter ancestors survived this adrenaline
I went to find it before I went inside and BAM gone again, never located
BAM fears of cricket in my pants reinstated
I don't know how our hunter ancestors survived this adrenaline
I knew the moment my cat stopped hanging around her human dad after he went to bed, she'd be out in the living room ready to hunt the cricket in the stairway landing / entry.
I was a bit late, but I safely escorted this loud af juvenile out, obviously lost af, and now it's chilling under a leaf.
I was a bit late, but I safely escorted this loud af juvenile out, obviously lost af, and now it's chilling under a leaf.
September 28, 2025 at 3:00 AM
I knew the moment my cat stopped hanging around her human dad after he went to bed, she'd be out in the living room ready to hunt the cricket in the stairway landing / entry.
I was a bit late, but I safely escorted this loud af juvenile out, obviously lost af, and now it's chilling under a leaf.
I was a bit late, but I safely escorted this loud af juvenile out, obviously lost af, and now it's chilling under a leaf.
Hello, workers compensation?
I need to document, uhh, getting my ass kicked by a 2nd grader.
Pictures? Oh, here's 73815 of my bruises from just today.
I need to document, uhh, getting my ass kicked by a 2nd grader.
Pictures? Oh, here's 73815 of my bruises from just today.
September 23, 2025 at 9:04 PM
Hello, workers compensation?
I need to document, uhh, getting my ass kicked by a 2nd grader.
Pictures? Oh, here's 73815 of my bruises from just today.
I need to document, uhh, getting my ass kicked by a 2nd grader.
Pictures? Oh, here's 73815 of my bruises from just today.
They trademarked the lactobacillic bacteria in my probiotic wtf
September 22, 2025 at 2:20 PM
They trademarked the lactobacillic bacteria in my probiotic wtf
I am losing my fucking mind again 🙃
September 15, 2025 at 1:03 AM
I am losing my fucking mind again 🙃
Don't mind me, I'm just having a panic attack about not being able to eat, making myself further unable to eat
And then I'm panicking about wasting food for the 1500th time
Catch me passing out in the imminent future, which i will also feel irresolvable guilt about. Yay.
And then I'm panicking about wasting food for the 1500th time
Catch me passing out in the imminent future, which i will also feel irresolvable guilt about. Yay.
September 15, 2025 at 12:51 AM
Don't mind me, I'm just having a panic attack about not being able to eat, making myself further unable to eat
And then I'm panicking about wasting food for the 1500th time
Catch me passing out in the imminent future, which i will also feel irresolvable guilt about. Yay.
And then I'm panicking about wasting food for the 1500th time
Catch me passing out in the imminent future, which i will also feel irresolvable guilt about. Yay.
that one Mitchell and Webb scene, "are we the baddies," is obv relevant to a multitude of shit rn
but I don't know whether to laugh or, at least shed a single tear, bc I saw somebody use "numberwang" re: current events and it....actually perfectly fit.
is this real life
but I don't know whether to laugh or, at least shed a single tear, bc I saw somebody use "numberwang" re: current events and it....actually perfectly fit.
is this real life
September 14, 2025 at 1:51 PM
that one Mitchell and Webb scene, "are we the baddies," is obv relevant to a multitude of shit rn
but I don't know whether to laugh or, at least shed a single tear, bc I saw somebody use "numberwang" re: current events and it....actually perfectly fit.
is this real life
but I don't know whether to laugh or, at least shed a single tear, bc I saw somebody use "numberwang" re: current events and it....actually perfectly fit.
is this real life
I don't know why I thought i could manage a football game today when I've thought, "hmm I might need a doctor imminently" at least 3 days this week
I didn't even make it to my seat before I felt like I was going to pass out or projectile vomit. Weeeee.
I didn't even make it to my seat before I felt like I was going to pass out or projectile vomit. Weeeee.
September 14, 2025 at 12:51 AM
I don't know why I thought i could manage a football game today when I've thought, "hmm I might need a doctor imminently" at least 3 days this week
I didn't even make it to my seat before I felt like I was going to pass out or projectile vomit. Weeeee.
I didn't even make it to my seat before I felt like I was going to pass out or projectile vomit. Weeeee.
I could be really wrong here, but has anyone tried to teach poltergeists, ghosts, & the like about modern financial literacy?
September 13, 2025 at 3:52 AM
I could be really wrong here, but has anyone tried to teach poltergeists, ghosts, & the like about modern financial literacy?
I've felt awful the past few days, but I persisted bc I can be overly sensitive.
I almost passed out like 5 times, still persisted, and then ended my work day 6h early by violently throwing up in a humorously small toilet, sized for kindergarten kids.
I almost passed out like 5 times, still persisted, and then ended my work day 6h early by violently throwing up in a humorously small toilet, sized for kindergarten kids.
September 12, 2025 at 2:56 AM
I've felt awful the past few days, but I persisted bc I can be overly sensitive.
I almost passed out like 5 times, still persisted, and then ended my work day 6h early by violently throwing up in a humorously small toilet, sized for kindergarten kids.
I almost passed out like 5 times, still persisted, and then ended my work day 6h early by violently throwing up in a humorously small toilet, sized for kindergarten kids.
Certain things make me hyper-aware of american food and my own inability to 'find' my words as quickly as I want
It was today, as I almost dropped my cheese-filled burger in the shape of a hot dog, when the thought, "oh no, not my burger...schlong!!" crossed my mind.
It was today, as I almost dropped my cheese-filled burger in the shape of a hot dog, when the thought, "oh no, not my burger...schlong!!" crossed my mind.
September 11, 2025 at 5:22 PM
Certain things make me hyper-aware of american food and my own inability to 'find' my words as quickly as I want
It was today, as I almost dropped my cheese-filled burger in the shape of a hot dog, when the thought, "oh no, not my burger...schlong!!" crossed my mind.
It was today, as I almost dropped my cheese-filled burger in the shape of a hot dog, when the thought, "oh no, not my burger...schlong!!" crossed my mind.
Everything is making me real fucking sad, part 74309
September 6, 2025 at 3:14 AM
Everything is making me real fucking sad, part 74309
AND AS IF THINGS COULDNT GET WORSE
One of my neighbors killed the daddy long leg that kept greeting me at my door like a puppy
AND IVE SAVED LIKE 5 WASPS THIS WEEK
which ig is good but I had to report their continued existence bc they're in our class & all over the playground :(
One of my neighbors killed the daddy long leg that kept greeting me at my door like a puppy
AND IVE SAVED LIKE 5 WASPS THIS WEEK
which ig is good but I had to report their continued existence bc they're in our class & all over the playground :(
September 5, 2025 at 10:27 PM
AND AS IF THINGS COULDNT GET WORSE
One of my neighbors killed the daddy long leg that kept greeting me at my door like a puppy
AND IVE SAVED LIKE 5 WASPS THIS WEEK
which ig is good but I had to report their continued existence bc they're in our class & all over the playground :(
One of my neighbors killed the daddy long leg that kept greeting me at my door like a puppy
AND IVE SAVED LIKE 5 WASPS THIS WEEK
which ig is good but I had to report their continued existence bc they're in our class & all over the playground :(
first day of school yesterday, found out my aunt who had heart surgery last week is going into hospice, and my uni denied my app for a special ed program
I am bad at life and overwhelmed weeeeee
I am bad at life and overwhelmed weeeeee
September 4, 2025 at 12:15 AM
first day of school yesterday, found out my aunt who had heart surgery last week is going into hospice, and my uni denied my app for a special ed program
I am bad at life and overwhelmed weeeeee
I am bad at life and overwhelmed weeeeee
BREAKING NEWS
this friend has all 8 legs
this is not my 7-legged friend at all, but an imposter
I will still welcome them but
CHUCK, WHAT HAPPENED TO CHARLIE?
only spurders in the building type of shit tbh
this friend has all 8 legs
this is not my 7-legged friend at all, but an imposter
I will still welcome them but
CHUCK, WHAT HAPPENED TO CHARLIE?
only spurders in the building type of shit tbh
September 1, 2025 at 1:42 AM
BREAKING NEWS
this friend has all 8 legs
this is not my 7-legged friend at all, but an imposter
I will still welcome them but
CHUCK, WHAT HAPPENED TO CHARLIE?
only spurders in the building type of shit tbh
this friend has all 8 legs
this is not my 7-legged friend at all, but an imposter
I will still welcome them but
CHUCK, WHAT HAPPENED TO CHARLIE?
only spurders in the building type of shit tbh
I came on here to complain about the fact I've shown a daddy long legs mercy too many times, jokingly, as I sit on my step smoking.
I was ready to say this thing sees me like a mom.
As the app loaded, I look over & who do I see? My lil 7-legged child staring directly at me as it sits on the wall.
I was ready to say this thing sees me like a mom.
As the app loaded, I look over & who do I see? My lil 7-legged child staring directly at me as it sits on the wall.
September 1, 2025 at 1:22 AM
I came on here to complain about the fact I've shown a daddy long legs mercy too many times, jokingly, as I sit on my step smoking.
I was ready to say this thing sees me like a mom.
As the app loaded, I look over & who do I see? My lil 7-legged child staring directly at me as it sits on the wall.
I was ready to say this thing sees me like a mom.
As the app loaded, I look over & who do I see? My lil 7-legged child staring directly at me as it sits on the wall.
please mark today, Aug 30 2025, as the first time I've been content with the eyes I've drawn
Do my proportions and shading need work? Yes. Are they soulless and haunting like usual? Somehow no. Good job, me.
Do my proportions and shading need work? Yes. Are they soulless and haunting like usual? Somehow no. Good job, me.
August 31, 2025 at 2:53 AM
please mark today, Aug 30 2025, as the first time I've been content with the eyes I've drawn
Do my proportions and shading need work? Yes. Are they soulless and haunting like usual? Somehow no. Good job, me.
Do my proportions and shading need work? Yes. Are they soulless and haunting like usual? Somehow no. Good job, me.
sometimes you have to come to terms with the fact that you are someone who saves wasps and, if presented with more wasps in need of help, you will continue to save them
August 30, 2025 at 2:45 PM
sometimes you have to come to terms with the fact that you are someone who saves wasps and, if presented with more wasps in need of help, you will continue to save them
Im beginning to think I am just very bad at verbalizing anything in my head and need to take a vow of silence or go to like, a puppy socialization school?? Do they have those for grown humans??
August 28, 2025 at 9:07 PM
Im beginning to think I am just very bad at verbalizing anything in my head and need to take a vow of silence or go to like, a puppy socialization school?? Do they have those for grown humans??
You ever just tryna go about your day when you get caught off guard by a random, "if you fell back off this chair like you have 100 times before and cracked your head open you'd probably die and be here til tmrw cause nobody gives a shit about you," and then you're like, "hmm...yeah"
August 28, 2025 at 2:49 PM
You ever just tryna go about your day when you get caught off guard by a random, "if you fell back off this chair like you have 100 times before and cracked your head open you'd probably die and be here til tmrw cause nobody gives a shit about you," and then you're like, "hmm...yeah"
On today's episode of "confusing permissive parenting with gentle parenting," we listen as ppl say it doesn't work at all bc their nephew strangled someone
Like.
What
Like.
What
August 27, 2025 at 1:24 PM
On today's episode of "confusing permissive parenting with gentle parenting," we listen as ppl say it doesn't work at all bc their nephew strangled someone
Like.
What
Like.
What
There's something about (1) my ex I've been divorced from for 7 yrs giving cops my number when he got arrested for a dui and (2) transcript records falsely showing i attended uni in a state next to them last year that just.....oof my anxiety levels.
August 26, 2025 at 9:46 PM
There's something about (1) my ex I've been divorced from for 7 yrs giving cops my number when he got arrested for a dui and (2) transcript records falsely showing i attended uni in a state next to them last year that just.....oof my anxiety levels.
working in a school and trying to go back to school and neither the work school year or the school school year have started yet so you're just anxious all over about st you thought you'd never have to worry about again bc ahhhhhhh school
August 26, 2025 at 8:10 PM
working in a school and trying to go back to school and neither the work school year or the school school year have started yet so you're just anxious all over about st you thought you'd never have to worry about again bc ahhhhhhh school
me to myself, making art:
this kinda reminds me of quilling
i wonder if there's a name for what I'm doing
sounds like something i'm gonna google
yup...
...but what if I didn't
what if I just ignorantly decide I created a new thing without checking...
I'm gonna call this #gaypop
this kinda reminds me of quilling
i wonder if there's a name for what I'm doing
sounds like something i'm gonna google
yup...
...but what if I didn't
what if I just ignorantly decide I created a new thing without checking...
I'm gonna call this #gaypop
August 24, 2025 at 10:27 AM
me to myself, making art:
this kinda reminds me of quilling
i wonder if there's a name for what I'm doing
sounds like something i'm gonna google
yup...
...but what if I didn't
what if I just ignorantly decide I created a new thing without checking...
I'm gonna call this #gaypop
this kinda reminds me of quilling
i wonder if there's a name for what I'm doing
sounds like something i'm gonna google
yup...
...but what if I didn't
what if I just ignorantly decide I created a new thing without checking...
I'm gonna call this #gaypop
I've had a lot of lows, but my aunt using Hitchhiker's Guide to get me to shut up and stop rambling so she can go to bed is a new one
How tf are you gonna tell me, "thanks for all the fish and goodnight" in a serious tone 😭
I don't know if I'm more angry or impressed rn
How tf are you gonna tell me, "thanks for all the fish and goodnight" in a serious tone 😭
I don't know if I'm more angry or impressed rn
August 17, 2025 at 12:04 AM
I've had a lot of lows, but my aunt using Hitchhiker's Guide to get me to shut up and stop rambling so she can go to bed is a new one
How tf are you gonna tell me, "thanks for all the fish and goodnight" in a serious tone 😭
I don't know if I'm more angry or impressed rn
How tf are you gonna tell me, "thanks for all the fish and goodnight" in a serious tone 😭
I don't know if I'm more angry or impressed rn