Whitney 🏁🍂
@f1whitney.coys.social
Weird girl in court with even weirder machine. ⚖️ Anemic & Sleepy. #COYS 🤍 #ForzaFerrari 🔴
All my opinions are correct and peer-reviewed.
Bantz Merchant. 🤟🏻
All my opinions are correct and peer-reviewed.
Bantz Merchant. 🤟🏻
Pinned
Special shout out to Sky Sports Halo™️©️®️ for helping me understand sportz and fall in love with F1 + THFC.
Couldn’t have done it without you! 🫡
P.S. GOTH AWAY KIT SUPREMACY 🖤
Couldn’t have done it without you! 🫡
P.S. GOTH AWAY KIT SUPREMACY 🖤
November 15, 2025 at 2:11 AM
Special shout out to Sky Sports Halo™️©️®️ for helping me understand sportz and fall in love with F1 + THFC.
Couldn’t have done it without you! 🫡
P.S. GOTH AWAY KIT SUPREMACY 🖤
Couldn’t have done it without you! 🫡
P.S. GOTH AWAY KIT SUPREMACY 🖤
November 15, 2025 at 1:23 AM
Special shout out to Sky Sports Halo™️©️®️ for helping me understand sportz and fall in love with F1 + THFC.
Couldn’t have done it without you! 🫡
P.S. GOTH AWAY KIT SUPREMACY 🖤
Couldn’t have done it without you! 🫡
P.S. GOTH AWAY KIT SUPREMACY 🖤
My cousin has started building his new house on my road!
Drove past him working today on the way home. It’s like a mile from me!
Honestly super excited about this.
He’s helpful + nice + handy + has two teen boys that I will absolutely pay to do my yard work. 😆
(Makes me feel safer too!)
Drove past him working today on the way home. It’s like a mile from me!
Honestly super excited about this.
He’s helpful + nice + handy + has two teen boys that I will absolutely pay to do my yard work. 😆
(Makes me feel safer too!)
November 14, 2025 at 8:52 PM
My cousin has started building his new house on my road!
Drove past him working today on the way home. It’s like a mile from me!
Honestly super excited about this.
He’s helpful + nice + handy + has two teen boys that I will absolutely pay to do my yard work. 😆
(Makes me feel safer too!)
Drove past him working today on the way home. It’s like a mile from me!
Honestly super excited about this.
He’s helpful + nice + handy + has two teen boys that I will absolutely pay to do my yard work. 😆
(Makes me feel safer too!)
A court officer came up to me and said, “That’s a Young Sheldon-ass shirt,” and I’ve never felt so roasted IN MY LIFE lmao. 😭😭😭
November 14, 2025 at 6:12 PM
A court officer came up to me and said, “That’s a Young Sheldon-ass shirt,” and I’ve never felt so roasted IN MY LIFE lmao. 😭😭😭
Oh shit.
I’m working a motion on a death penalty case as soon as we go on the record this morning.
The entire courthouse is PACKED; the elected DA is here.
I’m sweating. 😅
I’m working a motion on a death penalty case as soon as we go on the record this morning.
The entire courthouse is PACKED; the elected DA is here.
I’m sweating. 😅
November 14, 2025 at 2:46 PM
Oh shit.
I’m working a motion on a death penalty case as soon as we go on the record this morning.
The entire courthouse is PACKED; the elected DA is here.
I’m sweating. 😅
I’m working a motion on a death penalty case as soon as we go on the record this morning.
The entire courthouse is PACKED; the elected DA is here.
I’m sweating. 😅
Fizzy soda for my work commute = Obtained ✅
November 14, 2025 at 2:09 PM
Fizzy soda for my work commute = Obtained ✅
I am having such a diabolical craving for a crisp, fountain soda that I think I may actually have to stop and get one on the way to work.
November 14, 2025 at 12:26 PM
I am having such a diabolical craving for a crisp, fountain soda that I think I may actually have to stop and get one on the way to work.
My trial for next week got continued so I just need to get this last in-person day over with then I’m WFH for three weeks.
(Which I really need to push out a giant trial transcript order.)
#TGIF, etc.
(Which I really need to push out a giant trial transcript order.)
#TGIF, etc.
November 14, 2025 at 11:02 AM
My trial for next week got continued so I just need to get this last in-person day over with then I’m WFH for three weeks.
(Which I really need to push out a giant trial transcript order.)
#TGIF, etc.
(Which I really need to push out a giant trial transcript order.)
#TGIF, etc.
I love these little Publix oven meals when I’m too lazy to cook.
November 14, 2025 at 2:50 AM
I love these little Publix oven meals when I’m too lazy to cook.
Went to pick up my prescriptions and this guy in a giant truck said:
“Is your car an electric?”
And I said:
“Nah, hybrid.”
He said:
“Hybrid.”
And just shut his door.
All in a neutral tone.
No idea how to read that interaction.
😂
“Is your car an electric?”
And I said:
“Nah, hybrid.”
He said:
“Hybrid.”
And just shut his door.
All in a neutral tone.
No idea how to read that interaction.
😂
November 14, 2025 at 2:23 AM
Went to pick up my prescriptions and this guy in a giant truck said:
“Is your car an electric?”
And I said:
“Nah, hybrid.”
He said:
“Hybrid.”
And just shut his door.
All in a neutral tone.
No idea how to read that interaction.
😂
“Is your car an electric?”
And I said:
“Nah, hybrid.”
He said:
“Hybrid.”
And just shut his door.
All in a neutral tone.
No idea how to read that interaction.
😂
Managed to sync up both monthly prescriptions today.
I am a GOD.
*bows*
🙇🏼♀️
I am a GOD.
*bows*
🙇🏼♀️
November 13, 2025 at 9:35 PM
Managed to sync up both monthly prescriptions today.
I am a GOD.
*bows*
🙇🏼♀️
I am a GOD.
*bows*
🙇🏼♀️
This will expose me for the Tennesseean and neighbor Nashvillian I am, but I am obsessed with Margo Price lately.
I first met her through a Nashville episode of Anthony Bourdain’s “No Reservations” and I’ve adored her since.
She reminds me of Dolly; she’s that good.
youtu.be/LtxUDSRfmto?...
I first met her through a Nashville episode of Anthony Bourdain’s “No Reservations” and I’ve adored her since.
She reminds me of Dolly; she’s that good.
youtu.be/LtxUDSRfmto?...
Margo Price - Hurtin' (On The Bottle) [Official Video]
YouTube video by OfficialTMR
youtu.be
November 13, 2025 at 5:42 AM
This will expose me for the Tennesseean and neighbor Nashvillian I am, but I am obsessed with Margo Price lately.
I first met her through a Nashville episode of Anthony Bourdain’s “No Reservations” and I’ve adored her since.
She reminds me of Dolly; she’s that good.
youtu.be/LtxUDSRfmto?...
I first met her through a Nashville episode of Anthony Bourdain’s “No Reservations” and I’ve adored her since.
She reminds me of Dolly; she’s that good.
youtu.be/LtxUDSRfmto?...
Reposted by Whitney 🏁🍂
love a man wearing slutty little glasses
November 12, 2025 at 7:10 PM
love a man wearing slutty little glasses
They reached out today, for real. Made me so happy. 🥰🫶🏻
Discord ghost-pinged me a DM from someone I miss tonight.
Kind of cruel honestly. 🥲
Kind of cruel honestly. 🥲
November 13, 2025 at 4:37 AM
They reached out today, for real. Made me so happy. 🥰🫶🏻
The latest episode of Last Week Tonight with John Oliver tackles felony murder.
I’m about to watch it and I’m so pumped.
This is one of those topics I could easily do a thirty-minute presentation on, unprompted.
Probably way longer actually. 😆
I’m about to watch it and I’m so pumped.
This is one of those topics I could easily do a thirty-minute presentation on, unprompted.
Probably way longer actually. 😆
November 13, 2025 at 2:30 AM
The latest episode of Last Week Tonight with John Oliver tackles felony murder.
I’m about to watch it and I’m so pumped.
This is one of those topics I could easily do a thirty-minute presentation on, unprompted.
Probably way longer actually. 😆
I’m about to watch it and I’m so pumped.
This is one of those topics I could easily do a thirty-minute presentation on, unprompted.
Probably way longer actually. 😆
My favorite part of today was when a new ADA came up to me on recess to ask how my machine works.
I gave him the basics but then showed him some of my “tricks,” which attracted a crowd. (1/2)
I gave him the basics but then showed him some of my “tricks,” which attracted a crowd. (1/2)
November 13, 2025 at 2:04 AM
My favorite part of today was when a new ADA came up to me on recess to ask how my machine works.
I gave him the basics but then showed him some of my “tricks,” which attracted a crowd. (1/2)
I gave him the basics but then showed him some of my “tricks,” which attracted a crowd. (1/2)
All right. Jury is deliberating now. I hope it’s not a long wait - ready to goooooo!
November 12, 2025 at 9:00 PM
All right. Jury is deliberating now. I hope it’s not a long wait - ready to goooooo!
Okay.
This will sound like a “government job” bullshit complaint, but I hate how long our lunches are sometimes.
I do not need an hour and a half. No one does.
ANYWAY I’M BORED
This will sound like a “government job” bullshit complaint, but I hate how long our lunches are sometimes.
I do not need an hour and a half. No one does.
ANYWAY I’M BORED
November 12, 2025 at 7:14 PM
Okay.
This will sound like a “government job” bullshit complaint, but I hate how long our lunches are sometimes.
I do not need an hour and a half. No one does.
ANYWAY I’M BORED
This will sound like a “government job” bullshit complaint, but I hate how long our lunches are sometimes.
I do not need an hour and a half. No one does.
ANYWAY I’M BORED
Maybe we can do this in one day. State and defense have rested.
Jury instructions, closings, and (hopefully) deliberations after lunch!
Jury instructions, closings, and (hopefully) deliberations after lunch!
November 12, 2025 at 6:42 PM
Maybe we can do this in one day. State and defense have rested.
Jury instructions, closings, and (hopefully) deliberations after lunch!
Jury instructions, closings, and (hopefully) deliberations after lunch!
Wearing my Tottenham away kit in court since I’m in a different county.
November 12, 2025 at 2:17 PM
Wearing my Tottenham away kit in court since I’m in a different county.
Jesus. Just had to block someone that won’t STFU in my DMs when I tell them I need to go back to bed.
Cannot stand when people don’t respect basic boundaries.
Cannot stand when people don’t respect basic boundaries.
November 12, 2025 at 8:18 AM
Jesus. Just had to block someone that won’t STFU in my DMs when I tell them I need to go back to bed.
Cannot stand when people don’t respect basic boundaries.
Cannot stand when people don’t respect basic boundaries.
“Come Sally RIDE THIS DICK” is a feminist pickup line actually.
November 12, 2025 at 7:43 AM
“Come Sally RIDE THIS DICK” is a feminist pickup line actually.
Discord ghost-pinged me a DM from someone I miss tonight.
Kind of cruel honestly. 🥲
Kind of cruel honestly. 🥲
November 12, 2025 at 7:31 AM
Discord ghost-pinged me a DM from someone I miss tonight.
Kind of cruel honestly. 🥲
Kind of cruel honestly. 🥲
Wake up in the middle of the night to some movie Amazon has autoplayed.
I know the actor but can’t think of his name:
Nicolas Taylor?
Nicolas Alexander?
Nicolas Walker?
AHHH.
Nicolas Cage.
That’s the one.
I got there. 😂
I know the actor but can’t think of his name:
Nicolas Taylor?
Nicolas Alexander?
Nicolas Walker?
AHHH.
Nicolas Cage.
That’s the one.
I got there. 😂
November 12, 2025 at 7:21 AM
Wake up in the middle of the night to some movie Amazon has autoplayed.
I know the actor but can’t think of his name:
Nicolas Taylor?
Nicolas Alexander?
Nicolas Walker?
AHHH.
Nicolas Cage.
That’s the one.
I got there. 😂
I know the actor but can’t think of his name:
Nicolas Taylor?
Nicolas Alexander?
Nicolas Walker?
AHHH.
Nicolas Cage.
That’s the one.
I got there. 😂
I don’t feel like working a FULL trial tomorrow.
I’d rather it be two (2) days instead of one where my writing is shit and my hands are exhausted by 4 p.m.
…And I have a full docket day on Friday.
Ughhhh.
I’d rather it be two (2) days instead of one where my writing is shit and my hands are exhausted by 4 p.m.
…And I have a full docket day on Friday.
Ughhhh.
November 12, 2025 at 2:41 AM
I don’t feel like working a FULL trial tomorrow.
I’d rather it be two (2) days instead of one where my writing is shit and my hands are exhausted by 4 p.m.
…And I have a full docket day on Friday.
Ughhhh.
I’d rather it be two (2) days instead of one where my writing is shit and my hands are exhausted by 4 p.m.
…And I have a full docket day on Friday.
Ughhhh.