@fake-speeches.bsky.social
Posting politics and social issues and occasionally fake speeches I wish politicians would make
Reposted
Things are going great on The Everything App with MechaHitler in charge.
January 2, 2026 at 2:05 AM
Things are going great on The Everything App with MechaHitler in charge.
Trump is the Jussie Smollet of white people
January 2, 2026 at 4:52 AM
Trump is the Jussie Smollet of white people
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Gosh. If only some widely read political media properties had been willing to call out Trump's disavowals as nonsense. If only.
January 2, 2026 at 12:09 AM
Gosh. If only some widely read political media properties had been willing to call out Trump's disavowals as nonsense. If only.
Kind of spooky how accurately Back to the Future II captured Donald Trump as a person and president
January 2, 2026 at 3:33 AM
Kind of spooky how accurately Back to the Future II captured Donald Trump as a person and president
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Trump ran a very identity politics campaign in 2024, JD Vance is giving speeches going “it’s ok to be white,” Kamala Harris avoided identity politics, even dismissed prompts to bait her into it with “same old tired playbook, next question.” And yet.
By “identity politics,” a lot just mean identity.
By “identity politics,” a lot just mean identity.
i think a lot about how like the normie voter codes Kamala more radical than Bernie and/or Trump
Zohran is a Moderate because he's a normal guy
December 31, 2025 at 2:29 AM
Trump ran a very identity politics campaign in 2024, JD Vance is giving speeches going “it’s ok to be white,” Kamala Harris avoided identity politics, even dismissed prompts to bait her into it with “same old tired playbook, next question.” And yet.
By “identity politics,” a lot just mean identity.
By “identity politics,” a lot just mean identity.
Reposted
[CW: prison rape, coercive rape]
1. Geo Group operates private prisons
2. Government is appalled at the "stunning indifference" to constant sexual abuse by guards of children as *young as 13*
3. Governors start trying to end private prisons
4. Geo tries to keep its prisons and grow ICE facilities
🤷🏿♂️
1. Geo Group operates private prisons
2. Government is appalled at the "stunning indifference" to constant sexual abuse by guards of children as *young as 13*
3. Governors start trying to end private prisons
4. Geo tries to keep its prisons and grow ICE facilities
🤷🏿♂️
December 31, 2025 at 12:10 PM
[CW: prison rape, coercive rape]
1. Geo Group operates private prisons
2. Government is appalled at the "stunning indifference" to constant sexual abuse by guards of children as *young as 13*
3. Governors start trying to end private prisons
4. Geo tries to keep its prisons and grow ICE facilities
🤷🏿♂️
1. Geo Group operates private prisons
2. Government is appalled at the "stunning indifference" to constant sexual abuse by guards of children as *young as 13*
3. Governors start trying to end private prisons
4. Geo tries to keep its prisons and grow ICE facilities
🤷🏿♂️
Reposted
Another fun fact: Donald Trump has more felonies than there are trans athletes...
December 31, 2025 at 5:01 PM
Another fun fact: Donald Trump has more felonies than there are trans athletes...
Reposted
unvarnished gutter racism and Nazism from the president. a disgrace to our country.
December 31, 2025 at 4:32 PM
unvarnished gutter racism and Nazism from the president. a disgrace to our country.
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I just want to repeat that there’s no innocent explanation for this.
December 31, 2025 at 4:02 AM
I just want to repeat that there’s no innocent explanation for this.
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Day 3 of me, a known tech bro, defending the honor and good name of career government officials.
Part of the reason we're in the mess we're in, is that too many of y'all believe the lies that government officials are less smart or less motivated, than the private sector.
That's complete nonsense.
Part of the reason we're in the mess we're in, is that too many of y'all believe the lies that government officials are less smart or less motivated, than the private sector.
That's complete nonsense.
December 30, 2025 at 8:41 PM
Day 3 of me, a known tech bro, defending the honor and good name of career government officials.
Part of the reason we're in the mess we're in, is that too many of y'all believe the lies that government officials are less smart or less motivated, than the private sector.
That's complete nonsense.
Part of the reason we're in the mess we're in, is that too many of y'all believe the lies that government officials are less smart or less motivated, than the private sector.
That's complete nonsense.
Reposted
$47 million fraud case dropped by Trump after Wiederhorn made huge donations to his campaign and inaugural fund. Not Somali.
December 30, 2025 at 7:53 PM
$47 million fraud case dropped by Trump after Wiederhorn made huge donations to his campaign and inaugural fund. Not Somali.
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This is true and I was the only one on set excited about it (and playing the song on my phone to blank stares)
Just watched the new Knives Out and I think it's really important you know that the scene in the Seminary's Gym is filmed in the same place Rick Astley filmed the music video for Never Gonna Give You Up.
I saw the window tracery and immediately made my friends pause the film so I could tell them.
I saw the window tracery and immediately made my friends pause the film so I could tell them.
December 30, 2025 at 4:21 AM
This is true and I was the only one on set excited about it (and playing the song on my phone to blank stares)
I was honestly thinking this Nobel prize talk was just some game for the media
But trump is seriously deranged on this
Wow
But trump is seriously deranged on this
Wow
Trump ranting to Netanyahu on a hot mic: "Do I get credit for it? No. They gave the Nob-- I did 8 of them. How about India and Pakistan? So I did 8 of them. And then I'll tell you the rest of it."
December 30, 2025 at 3:54 AM
I was honestly thinking this Nobel prize talk was just some game for the media
But trump is seriously deranged on this
Wow
But trump is seriously deranged on this
Wow
Reposted
So the President did disclose a CIA drone strike inside Venezuela.
And this does cross a red line of violating the UN Charter -- where the boat strikes on high seas had not.
www.cnn.com/2025/12/29/p...
And this does cross a red line of violating the UN Charter -- where the boat strikes on high seas had not.
www.cnn.com/2025/12/29/p...
Exclusive: CIA carried out drone strike on port facility on Venezuelan coast | CNN Politics
The CIA carried out a drone strike earlier this month on a port facility on the coast of Venezuela, sources familiar with the matter told CNN, marking the first known US attack on a target inside that...
www.cnn.com
December 30, 2025 at 1:46 AM
So the President did disclose a CIA drone strike inside Venezuela.
And this does cross a red line of violating the UN Charter -- where the boat strikes on high seas had not.
www.cnn.com/2025/12/29/p...
And this does cross a red line of violating the UN Charter -- where the boat strikes on high seas had not.
www.cnn.com/2025/12/29/p...
Reposted
Dammit, who leaked this?!
December 28, 2025 at 11:59 PM
Dammit, who leaked this?!
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Some white leftists now have a second reason that they hate Beyoncé
Beyoncé is officially a billionaire, Forbes says
Beyoncé is officially a billionaire, Forbes says
Beyoncé is officially a billionaire, Forbes says
She is the fifth musician to ever reach billionaire status, according to the outlet.
www.nbcnews.com
December 29, 2025 at 10:57 PM
Some white leftists now have a second reason that they hate Beyoncé
Beyoncé is officially a billionaire, Forbes says
Beyoncé is officially a billionaire, Forbes says
Reposted
this seems specifically designed to break mail-in voting (where deadlines are defined by postmark)
As of 12/24/25, USPS changed policy on when they postmark mail. Mail dropped off is no longer guaranteed a same-day postmark. Tax returns & other time-sensitive items are now stamped when they reach a regional processing center, which may be days later. Plan deadlines accordingly to avoid penalties.
USPS Announces Changes to the Postmark Date System
The United States Postal Service (USPS) has adopted a final rule (FR Doc.
share.google
December 29, 2025 at 9:51 PM
this seems specifically designed to break mail-in voting (where deadlines are defined by postmark)
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Republican enablers in Congress who are very aware of how sick and deranged this is will say nothing because they are afraid of the Mad King’s wrath. They will face an angry electorate soon, but not soon enough. bsky.app/profile/atru...
Trump: "Russia wants to see Ukraine succeed. It sounds a little strange but President Putin was very generous in his feeling toward Ukraine succeeding, including supplying energy, electricity and other things at very low prices."
December 29, 2025 at 12:42 AM
Republican enablers in Congress who are very aware of how sick and deranged this is will say nothing because they are afraid of the Mad King’s wrath. They will face an angry electorate soon, but not soon enough. bsky.app/profile/atru...
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Every single time Trump has a meeting with Zelensky, Putin calls Trump the day before and Trump’s position in the Zelensky meeting then mirrors the Russian position. The talking points are the same, with all the same lies. It’s a simple playbook for Putin and it works every time.
December 29, 2025 at 1:14 AM
Every single time Trump has a meeting with Zelensky, Putin calls Trump the day before and Trump’s position in the Zelensky meeting then mirrors the Russian position. The talking points are the same, with all the same lies. It’s a simple playbook for Putin and it works every time.
Reposted
Trump's DOJ was monitoring all the movements of the Miami Herald reporter who was covering the Epstein case.
December 28, 2025 at 9:03 PM
Trump's DOJ was monitoring all the movements of the Miami Herald reporter who was covering the Epstein case.
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This is the world Justice Kavanaugh sanctioned in his foolish & unnecessary concurring opinion to the Court’s order in Noem v Vasquez Perdomo. His hopes of cleaning up that blunder with a plaintive footnote in last week’s concurring opinion in Trump v. Illinois, demonstrates his staggering naïveté.
"'I have my ID!' Mubashir shouted repeatedly, as heard on the video. The agents do not respond."
www.mprnews.org/story/2025/1...
www.mprnews.org/story/2025/1...
ICE agents tackle, arrest American citizen in Minneapolis
Federal immigration agents tackled and arrested a Somali American man in Minneapolis on Tuesday and detained him for about two hours for no apparent reason other than his ethnicity.
www.mprnews.org
December 28, 2025 at 4:32 PM
This is the world Justice Kavanaugh sanctioned in his foolish & unnecessary concurring opinion to the Court’s order in Noem v Vasquez Perdomo. His hopes of cleaning up that blunder with a plaintive footnote in last week’s concurring opinion in Trump v. Illinois, demonstrates his staggering naïveté.
It should be federal law that African Americans get priority for opening dispensaries
December 28, 2025 at 2:08 AM
It should be federal law that African Americans get priority for opening dispensaries
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Denmark lost more troops per capita in the post 9/11 war on Afghanistan. Saying they “are not a good ally” because they won’t surrender their territories to the US is lunacy. We are betraying our allies to satisfy the whims of a would-be Emperor for whom the US is not enough.
They’re again advocating against Denmark when it comes to Greenland
December 27, 2025 at 4:13 PM
Denmark lost more troops per capita in the post 9/11 war on Afghanistan. Saying they “are not a good ally” because they won’t surrender their territories to the US is lunacy. We are betraying our allies to satisfy the whims of a would-be Emperor for whom the US is not enough.
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Geely’s latest EV is now outselling even the Tesla Model Y and the BYD Seagull.
insideevs.com/news/782861/...
insideevs.com/news/782861/...
Meet The Affordable EV Beating Tesla And BYD At Their Own Game
Geely’s Xingyuan EV has rocked China’s electric vehicle sales charts in a short period, outselling even the Tesla Model Y and BYD Seagull.
insideevs.com
December 27, 2025 at 3:18 PM
Geely’s latest EV is now outselling even the Tesla Model Y and the BYD Seagull.
insideevs.com/news/782861/...
insideevs.com/news/782861/...
Reposted
It was illegal but DHS rewards illegality
December 27, 2025 at 2:10 PM
It was illegal but DHS rewards illegality