Hazmatmonkey
@hazmatmonkey.bsky.social
Constant seeker and wanderer. Tired from the journey.
You can't write this shit.
January 13, 2026 at 6:37 PM
You can't write this shit.
Poor little dude. Who knew screwing over the American people would cause backlash?
January 6, 2026 at 1:37 AM
Poor little dude. Who knew screwing over the American people would cause backlash?
Is it Donald Jeffrey Trump?
January 4, 2026 at 10:13 PM
Is it Donald Jeffrey Trump?
Vs. a narcissist and pedofile in a corrupt and divided system. Sure, he isn't about the oil, right?
January 4, 2026 at 10:12 PM
Vs. a narcissist and pedofile in a corrupt and divided system. Sure, he isn't about the oil, right?
Oh bow before the Pumpkin Prince.
December 24, 2025 at 6:57 PM
Oh bow before the Pumpkin Prince.
Dear god the idiots are winning.
December 24, 2025 at 6:04 PM
Dear god the idiots are winning.
Good grief. The torture never stops. Do people not realize EVERYTHING with the Trump name on it tanks?
December 22, 2025 at 10:49 PM
Good grief. The torture never stops. Do people not realize EVERYTHING with the Trump name on it tanks?
The only productive thing coming out of Rubio's mouth was "who wants lunch?"
December 22, 2025 at 1:03 AM
The only productive thing coming out of Rubio's mouth was "who wants lunch?"
Don't fall for it. The Cheeto in Chief will have you extradited to Moscow so Mad Vlad can have you thrown down steps.
December 20, 2025 at 9:24 PM
Don't fall for it. The Cheeto in Chief will have you extradited to Moscow so Mad Vlad can have you thrown down steps.
Treacherous lout. I never knew he wanted to be any kind of pirate. Except a butt pirate.
December 17, 2025 at 2:37 AM
Treacherous lout. I never knew he wanted to be any kind of pirate. Except a butt pirate.
And when Melanoma says "let them eat cake," influencers will gorge themselves like the rotten little piglets they are. It's ironic, the tiniest penis needs a ballroom.
December 16, 2025 at 10:55 PM
And when Melanoma says "let them eat cake," influencers will gorge themselves like the rotten little piglets they are. It's ironic, the tiniest penis needs a ballroom.
The President licks giant donkey balls.
December 15, 2025 at 11:09 PM
The President licks giant donkey balls.
I ain't going out like that.
December 12, 2025 at 7:18 PM
I ain't going out like that.
I thought right-wingers didn't like participation trophies. Poor little woogums hates Nobel, so he gets a made in China Scientology medal. What an abortion.
December 10, 2025 at 10:20 PM
I thought right-wingers didn't like participation trophies. Poor little woogums hates Nobel, so he gets a made in China Scientology medal. What an abortion.
I like your style.
December 7, 2025 at 3:54 AM
I like your style.
The increase in spending? Yep. Tariffs. Fools.
December 2, 2025 at 2:58 AM
The increase in spending? Yep. Tariffs. Fools.
The President has a blunt head. 1000cc cranium, low brow ridges. Odd coloration. He had a brain scan earlier, and said "They didn't find anything." No shit.
December 2, 2025 at 2:56 AM
The President has a blunt head. 1000cc cranium, low brow ridges. Odd coloration. He had a brain scan earlier, and said "They didn't find anything." No shit.
Or on a spit like a good little orange piggy.
November 25, 2025 at 7:42 PM
Or on a spit like a good little orange piggy.