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Jimmy Two Heads 👻🎃💀

@jimmytwohands.bsky.social

4.3K followers 760 following 18K posts

I make music and comics for my own amusement. A jimbo, not a himbo. He/him Chicago number one in da world, baby!

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Jimmy Two Heads 👻🎃💀 @jimmytwohands.bsky.social · Jul 22

If you follow me on this site or I follow you, that means we are friends and I will totally share a bag of corn nuts with you ( if I have one)

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Jimmy Two Heads 👻🎃💀 @jimmytwohands.bsky.social · 26m

my main issue with mastodon is you cannot get this 420 number on a post. You will get a hundred retweets before you get 20 likes. I cannot switch over there completely if motherfuckers don’t learn the courtesy fave

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Jimmy Two Heads 👻🎃💀 @jimmytwohands.bsky.social · 28m

haha nice

The above post with 4 reposts and 20 likes, that’s the weed number

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Jimmy Two Heads 👻🎃💀 @jimmytwohands.bsky.social · 47m

ok now Phillies win this game and the next two please

Jimmy Two Heads 👻🎃💀 @jimmytwohands.bsky.social · 48m

lol remember when people were saying he did this as some machiavellian chess move. you stupid bitches

Brad Heath @bradheath.bsky.social · 2h

WSJ: President Trump believed his Truth Social post demanding prosecutions of James Comey and other political foes was a private message to his attorney general, and "and was surprised to learn it was public."

www.wsj.com/politics/pol...

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Jimmy Two Heads 👻🎃💀 @jimmytwohands.bsky.social · 54m

Canada is safe

Jimmy Two Heads 👻🎃💀 @jimmytwohands.bsky.social · 54m

HAHAHAHA FUCK YOU YANKEES SUCK MY ASS AND KISS MY COCK

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Reposted by Jimmy Two Heads 👻🎃💀

Kenny Goblins @kennylogins.bsky.social · 1d

screenshot of gonzo as narrator of the muppets christmas carol (1992), being implied to have said the quoted post

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Jimmy Two Heads 👻🎃💀 @jimmytwohands.bsky.social · 1h

I will declare war on Canada if they fuck this up

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Jimmy Two Heads 👻🎃💀 @jimmytwohands.bsky.social · 1h

toronto better fucking pull this shit off god damn it

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Jimmy Two Heads 👻🎃💀 @jimmytwohands.bsky.social · 1h

Smithers with a glowing stroked out trump glowing in a hospital gown saying

“MR. TRUMP UNDERGOES A SERIES OF MEDICAL TREATMENTS DESIGNED TO CHEAT DEATH FOR ANOTHER WEEK.”

Jimmy Two Heads 👻🎃💀 @jimmytwohands.bsky.social · 1h

Can check

A can of revolution dark mode imperial barrel aged milk stout poured into a fancy pants glass

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Jimmy Two Heads 👻🎃💀 @jimmytwohands.bsky.social · 1h

sir,

A cat named yeti sitting at a table with a plate of streak and squash and sprouts and a glass of beer

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Jimmy Two Heads 👻🎃💀 @jimmytwohands.bsky.social · 1h

i would still be allowed to say “cheez it, it’s the fuzz” if we still had woke

Jimmy Two Heads 👻🎃💀 @jimmytwohands.bsky.social · 3h

There are terrible things happening all around but i had a personal tragedy today

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Jimmy Two Heads 👻🎃💀 @jimmytwohands.bsky.social · 3h

I’m not a full time cubs hater but if the cubs and the yankees both lose today it would make so many cops mad

Jimmy Two Heads 👻🎃💀 @jimmytwohands.bsky.social · 4h

Fuck Gavin newsom, fuck his social media team, fuck transphobes everywhere

Jimmy Two Heads 👻🎃💀 @jimmytwohands.bsky.social · 4h

2023 bluesky was a paradise compared to twitter and mastodon, we’ll see how it goes

Jimmy Two Heads 👻🎃💀 @jimmytwohands.bsky.social · 5h

I would be very satisfied seeing the m’s in the world series, all I really care about is the yanks don’t get there

Jimmy Two Heads 👻🎃💀 @jimmytwohands.bsky.social · 5h

The format could use some improvement but it is much better than it was in 2023 for sure

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Jimmy Two Heads 👻🎃💀 @jimmytwohands.bsky.social · 5h

I have been a tigers fan my whole life so I will not get out over my skis here, we have plenty of room to crash out in game 5

Jimmy Two Heads 👻🎃💀 @jimmytwohands.bsky.social · 5h

my god we didn’t fuck it up yet

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Jimmy Two Heads 👻🎃💀 @jimmytwohands.bsky.social · 6h

Cotton Mather. I’d piledrive that clammy bitch

Reposted by Jimmy Two Heads 👻🎃💀

🎃Nosferascoob🎃 @scoobydouchebag.bsky.social · 8h

If you could go back in time, which theologian would you fight? For me, John Calvin was predestined to catch an ass kicking

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Jimmy Two Heads 👻🎃💀 @jimmytwohands.bsky.social · 7h

DOLLY IS FINE

in all manners of the word

PBS News @pbsnews.org · 7h

“There are just a lot of rumors flying around. But I figured if you heard it from me, you’d know that I was okay,” Dolly Parton said in a new two-minute video posted on Instagram. “I’m not ready to die yet. I don’t think God is through with me. And I ain’t done working.” https://to.pbs.org/4hc1DXB

'I'm not dying': Dolly Parton responds to concerns about her health

Late last month Parton postponed her first Las Vegas residency in 32 years, citing “health challenges.”

www.pbs.org

Jimmy Two Heads 👻🎃💀 @jimmytwohands.bsky.social · 7h

Kash Patel, interestingly, desperately wishes to be a goblin but is in fact an ogre