Emperor Joshua Norton II
@joshuanortonii.bsky.social
Emperor of the Internet. An ongoing proclamation: The internet is for those who strive to be better today than they were yesterday. The rest can log off and fuck off.
Bigotry is a huge no. Cishet wereman.
Bigotry is a huge no. Cishet wereman.
This one, you need to know two things.
1: I am a US immigrant from Norway
2: I work for Costco. The electronic department, to be precise. So I truly talk to our members a lot, and my accent obviously comes through.
Anyway, I about a year ago, I received this 100% perfect feedback:
1: I am a US immigrant from Norway
2: I work for Costco. The electronic department, to be precise. So I truly talk to our members a lot, and my accent obviously comes through.
Anyway, I about a year ago, I received this 100% perfect feedback:
November 27, 2025 at 5:34 PM
This one, you need to know two things.
1: I am a US immigrant from Norway
2: I work for Costco. The electronic department, to be precise. So I truly talk to our members a lot, and my accent obviously comes through.
Anyway, I about a year ago, I received this 100% perfect feedback:
1: I am a US immigrant from Norway
2: I work for Costco. The electronic department, to be precise. So I truly talk to our members a lot, and my accent obviously comes through.
Anyway, I about a year ago, I received this 100% perfect feedback:
And then it turns out that JD stands not for John Dorian... But John Dracula!
*Dun dun duuun*
*Dun dun duuun*
November 22, 2025 at 3:17 AM
And then it turns out that JD stands not for John Dorian... But John Dracula!
*Dun dun duuun*
*Dun dun duuun*
Every now and then when I see a post qoute-skeeting someone I've blocked, curiosity gets the better of me, and I start wondering what exactlty they are responding to.
This never, never, NEVER ends well.
Exhibit 1004, labeled "graphic content" because reading it is Very Bad For You:
This never, never, NEVER ends well.
Exhibit 1004, labeled "graphic content" because reading it is Very Bad For You:
November 19, 2025 at 4:17 PM
Every now and then when I see a post qoute-skeeting someone I've blocked, curiosity gets the better of me, and I start wondering what exactlty they are responding to.
This never, never, NEVER ends well.
Exhibit 1004, labeled "graphic content" because reading it is Very Bad For You:
This never, never, NEVER ends well.
Exhibit 1004, labeled "graphic content" because reading it is Very Bad For You:
On this day, 22 years ago, @cwtycho.penny-arcade.com of @penny-arcade.com made a wish, and the monkey paw finger started curling:
November 17, 2025 at 1:33 PM
On this day, 22 years ago, @cwtycho.penny-arcade.com of @penny-arcade.com made a wish, and the monkey paw finger started curling:
Is this a fight scene or a romance scene? Who's to say?
November 14, 2025 at 2:17 PM
Is this a fight scene or a romance scene? Who's to say?
The SMG bees are in fact very, very creepy.
November 14, 2025 at 2:13 PM
The SMG bees are in fact very, very creepy.
A month ago, 44-22 was an Eternal Scorigami.
Then the Cowboys ruined that.
And then this happened:
Then the Cowboys ruined that.
And then this happened:
November 10, 2025 at 3:05 PM
A month ago, 44-22 was an Eternal Scorigami.
Then the Cowboys ruined that.
And then this happened:
Then the Cowboys ruined that.
And then this happened:
Meanwhile, how it started and how it's going for the Cardinals:
November 9, 2025 at 10:31 PM
Meanwhile, how it started and how it's going for the Cardinals:
Someone is going to get really, really, REALLY disappointed...
November 8, 2025 at 5:20 AM
Someone is going to get really, really, REALLY disappointed...
Today's perfect timeline, courtesy of @karenho.bsky.social and @effinbirds.com :
November 5, 2025 at 11:12 PM
Today's perfect timeline, courtesy of @karenho.bsky.social and @effinbirds.com :
And the owner then cried "Mooom!" to Yelp's support staff, who at least seems to actually have read about the incident and worded their alert accordingly:
November 4, 2025 at 2:46 PM
And the owner then cried "Mooom!" to Yelp's support staff, who at least seems to actually have read about the incident and worded their alert accordingly:
To quote Roxette's "Spending my time":
This silly game of love
You play, you win
Only to lose
This silly game of love
You play, you win
Only to lose
October 24, 2025 at 12:10 PM
To quote Roxette's "Spending my time":
This silly game of love
You play, you win
Only to lose
This silly game of love
You play, you win
Only to lose
I swear I got this one on the first try... On the Switch version
Do not ask me how many times I tried on the Wii version back then.
Do not ask me how many times I tried on the Wii version back then.
October 14, 2025 at 2:13 PM
I swear I got this one on the first try... On the Switch version
Do not ask me how many times I tried on the Wii version back then.
Do not ask me how many times I tried on the Wii version back then.
Playing TLoZ: Wind Waker again and I maintain that the third person camera in that game still is the very best ever done. Instead of just going up and down, it pulls back and up. I'm so upset this didn't become standard:
October 8, 2025 at 2:46 AM
Playing TLoZ: Wind Waker again and I maintain that the third person camera in that game still is the very best ever done. Instead of just going up and down, it pulls back and up. I'm so upset this didn't become standard:
Oh, you think you're good at video games because you've beaten Dark Souls/Ninja Gaiden/the swimming level in the TMNT NES game?
Well, I have done this:
Well, I have done this:
October 8, 2025 at 2:42 AM
Oh, you think you're good at video games because you've beaten Dark Souls/Ninja Gaiden/the swimming level in the TMNT NES game?
Well, I have done this:
Well, I have done this:
Octopath Traveler 2: Yeah, we'd like you to gather all 8 characters by level 10 or something.
Me:
Me:
September 17, 2025 at 11:47 PM
Octopath Traveler 2: Yeah, we'd like you to gather all 8 characters by level 10 or something.
Me:
Me:
You don't tolerate being perfectly politely corrected. Got it.
And before you go all "she called me pal, I'm not her pal", I'd like to ask you if Katie Alcock is actually your sweetie. And maybe moderate your own language while you're at it.
Unless it's not disgusying when you do it, of course.
And before you go all "she called me pal, I'm not her pal", I'd like to ask you if Katie Alcock is actually your sweetie. And maybe moderate your own language while you're at it.
Unless it's not disgusying when you do it, of course.
September 15, 2025 at 8:29 PM
You don't tolerate being perfectly politely corrected. Got it.
And before you go all "she called me pal, I'm not her pal", I'd like to ask you if Katie Alcock is actually your sweetie. And maybe moderate your own language while you're at it.
Unless it's not disgusying when you do it, of course.
And before you go all "she called me pal, I'm not her pal", I'd like to ask you if Katie Alcock is actually your sweetie. And maybe moderate your own language while you're at it.
Unless it's not disgusying when you do it, of course.
The "disgusting", "vile" language in question:
September 15, 2025 at 8:08 PM
The "disgusting", "vile" language in question:
Well, as you sent me back to those early days, I discovered that the best foreshadowing came not in the comic itself, but in the comment field in strip four:
September 10, 2025 at 3:25 PM
Well, as you sent me back to those early days, I discovered that the best foreshadowing came not in the comic itself, but in the comment field in strip four:
The answer was this:
September 8, 2025 at 4:11 AM
The answer was this:
I can't believe @gailsimone.bsky.social is so famous that she now is a clue in Wordle puzzle books!
September 6, 2025 at 11:58 PM
I can't believe @gailsimone.bsky.social is so famous that she now is a clue in Wordle puzzle books!
First victory in a normal F-Zero 99 race!
Followed by crashing out post race!
Followed by crashing out post race!
July 14, 2025 at 3:02 PM
First victory in a normal F-Zero 99 race!
Followed by crashing out post race!
Followed by crashing out post race!
Me in team battles (all four images are just screenshots of me consistently racking up points and ranking high in F-Zero 99 team battles):
July 7, 2025 at 9:46 PM
Me in team battles (all four images are just screenshots of me consistently racking up points and ranking high in F-Zero 99 team battles):
July 7, 2025 at 9:41 PM