Caption: Well, it was a Yule log, but Oscar turned it into Yule sawdust.
Caption: Well, it was a Yule log, but Oscar turned it into Yule sawdust.
Caption: Of course he’s always happy. He’s in a constant state of denial.
Caption: Of course he’s always happy. He’s in a constant state of denial.
Caption: I never laid a beak on him. He told Dad that I was JUST a bird.
Caption: I never laid a beak on him. He told Dad that I was JUST a bird.
Caption: Well Caruso, you may call it caroling, but the neighbors are calling to complain about all the screaming.
Caption: Well Caruso, you may call it caroling, but the neighbors are calling to complain about all the screaming.
Caption: Of course I listen to my body, and it day, “I need an anchovy pizza, now!”
Caption: Of course I listen to my body, and it day, “I need an anchovy pizza, now!”
Caption: Why would you want an elf on a shelf, when you have a parrot on a carrot.
Caption: Why would you want an elf on a shelf, when you have a parrot on a carrot.
Caption: Does he bite? Well, let me put it this way, his ringtone is the theme song from “Jaws”.
Caption: Does he bite? Well, let me put it this way, his ringtone is the theme song from “Jaws”.
Caption: Sorry, I let Oscar buy the candles this year. I had no idea that they were anchovy scented.
Caption: Sorry, I let Oscar buy the candles this year. I had no idea that they were anchovy scented.
Caption: Larry says he’s a monk on a trunk.
Caption: Larry says he’s a monk on a trunk.
Caption: I do listen to my body. And it always gets me into trouble.
Caption: I do listen to my body. And it always gets me into trouble.
Caption: Instead of an elf on the shelf this year, we have a Quaker on a shaker.
Caption: Instead of an elf on the shelf this year, we have a Quaker on a shaker.
Caption: Well, they can talk and obey simple commands, but are they sentient like us?
Caption: Well, they can talk and obey simple commands, but are they sentient like us?
Caption: Oh sorry, you got Oscar’s bagel. He likes his with anchovies and a schmear.
Caption: Oh sorry, you got Oscar’s bagel. He likes his with anchovies and a schmear.
Caption: I’m getting a bad feeling about the new vet. Dad said he used to be a coroner.
Caption: I’m getting a bad feeling about the new vet. Dad said he used to be a coroner.
Caption: His owner spends a lot of time on her phone texting.
Caption: His owner spends a lot of time on her phone texting.
Caption: Bob’s talent is he’s a dive bomber.
Caption: Bob’s talent is he’s a dive bomber.
Caption: Mom joined a book of the month club. So we’ll get a new book to taste once every month.
Caption: Mom joined a book of the month club. So we’ll get a new book to taste once every month.
Caption: No, I don’t know what it’s for, but the guy on TV said to ask you if it’s right for me.
Caption: No, I don’t know what it’s for, but the guy on TV said to ask you if it’s right for me.
Caption: An ebook won’t replace the smell and feel of a good book … or the taste.
Caption: An ebook won’t replace the smell and feel of a good book … or the taste.
Caption: Why do you need to know what to use for blood stains?
Caption: Why do you need to know what to use for blood stains?
Caption: Why do you want to know if I have malpractice insurance?
Caption: Why do you want to know if I have malpractice insurance?
Caption: Oscar’s angry with me, because I said that nobody’s perfect.
Caption: Oscar’s angry with me, because I said that nobody’s perfect.
Caption: Obviously, whoever said two can live as cheaply as one, has never paid a water bill.
Caption: Obviously, whoever said two can live as cheaply as one, has never paid a water bill.
Caption: I like Black Friday a lot better than Cyber Monday, because I get that day off from school.
Caption: I like Black Friday a lot better than Cyber Monday, because I get that day off from school.