Kevin van Haaren
kevin.crime.group
Kevin van Haaren
@kevin.crime.group
Designated dingus. Kansas City, MO.
He/him

Mastodon: @[email protected]
January 30, 2026 at 10:00 AM
Ars Technica said his final message had that.

arstechnica.com/culture/2026...
January 13, 2026 at 8:00 PM
Can’t even listen to it any more but I still have the vinyl somewhere. At one time I had the entire thing memorized (plus many of his other albums) and still will drop one liners from it as jokes without realizing it.
January 6, 2026 at 2:12 AM
December 26, 2025 at 4:35 AM
Here’s an Apple Music version:
music.apple.com/us/playlist/...

There were 6 songs it couldn’t identify:
December 25, 2025 at 6:39 PM
Time to watch one of my favorite Christmas movies “The Thin Man”
December 24, 2025 at 1:18 AM
Testing my emergency storm preparedness.
December 19, 2025 at 1:09 AM
15 minutes after leaving the blood donation place shy a couple of units of red blood cells I get this. Normally I have to wait 16 weeks after a double red donation, but if 15 minutes is the new norm…
December 18, 2025 at 4:11 PM
Oh no
December 17, 2025 at 5:00 AM
I don’t care what ISO or Unicode standard you’re using, that ain’t right.
December 13, 2025 at 12:00 AM
December 11, 2025 at 8:09 AM
LOL They charge you $15,000 for DHS processing but there are additional fees for Dept. of State processing.

Also I bet that $1 million “donation” is direct to to Trump, not the government.
December 10, 2025 at 11:06 PM
Now that’s good web design.
December 10, 2025 at 11:02 PM
I guess Calvin attends OU
December 1, 2025 at 7:08 PM
November 26, 2025 at 2:14 AM
Not rustic pottery, but it did need tidying.
November 24, 2025 at 2:25 AM
Should’ve gone with the good stuff
October 31, 2025 at 11:30 PM
Oh, the St. Louis Arch is 60 years old today. My father lived in St. Louis at the time and would take photos of it under construction. Here’s one of his photos.
October 29, 2025 at 3:36 AM
Don’t most subscriptions give you a discount for paying annually, not charge you for 3 extra months?
October 25, 2025 at 1:57 PM
Mayor McCheese / Hamburglar / Grimace
October 8, 2025 at 1:11 AM
Please do not guess how long after this shot a fight broke out over the flower pot.
October 2, 2025 at 3:17 AM
If you see this, quote skeet with a screenshot from a video game released the year you were born.

No video games were released in my birth year, will something laptop shaped do?
September 27, 2025 at 3:40 PM
Today I learned that somebody takes all the rulings by the various state court of appeals and supreme courts and publishes them as ebooks and sells them for $.99 each. That’s weird, right?

Humorously they don’t understand New York’s court system as they published New York Supreme Court cases too.
September 20, 2025 at 7:38 PM
Should've just the put the I ain't reading all that meme on it
September 19, 2025 at 5:01 PM
Same artist?
September 19, 2025 at 12:34 AM