ok yep iam clean nao

You're not drinking alone on Thanksgiving if your dog laps up the wine you spilled.

Spending a lot of time posting online will not necessarily make you funnier, but you will get better at being able to tell which of the ideas you thought of in two seconds is the funniest

plugging headphones into the wall outlet to hear what my house is thinking

I got lost in a forest once and accidentally joined a Norwegian black metal band.

Asked my wife if she’s ever heard Suggondese music and I saw the weariness of a thousand lifetimes full her gaze

thanks for nothing