Matthew Writes Dumb Stuff
@matthewballen.bsky.social
ADHD screenwriter/author/copywriter of dark/dumb. Past projects inc. FRIEND REQUEST for Warner Bros. and headlines for The Onion.
This isn't about immigrants anymore, IMO. It's about winning elections.
That's why they're rounding up US citizens too.
And there was never going to be 3K non-citizens rounded up per day, let alone 3K criminals.
ICE's goal of 3K/day will mean 4 million of us gone by the 2028 election.
That's why they're rounding up US citizens too.
And there was never going to be 3K non-citizens rounded up per day, let alone 3K criminals.
ICE's goal of 3K/day will mean 4 million of us gone by the 2028 election.
January 15, 2026 at 8:03 PM
This isn't about immigrants anymore, IMO. It's about winning elections.
That's why they're rounding up US citizens too.
And there was never going to be 3K non-citizens rounded up per day, let alone 3K criminals.
ICE's goal of 3K/day will mean 4 million of us gone by the 2028 election.
That's why they're rounding up US citizens too.
And there was never going to be 3K non-citizens rounded up per day, let alone 3K criminals.
ICE's goal of 3K/day will mean 4 million of us gone by the 2028 election.
Kristi Noem, with no irony, said you can't just question her without identifying yourself.
June 12, 2025 at 9:53 PM
Kristi Noem, with no irony, said you can't just question her without identifying yourself.
The way things are going, kids who think they're getting 2 dolls at Christmas are setting their expectations way too high.
May 14, 2025 at 7:46 PM
The way things are going, kids who think they're getting 2 dolls at Christmas are setting their expectations way too high.
Took Musk a week to cut a billion from the Department of Education. He promised to cut $2 Trillion, so all he needs is another 2000 weeks and he'll get there!
February 11, 2025 at 11:43 PM
Took Musk a week to cut a billion from the Department of Education. He promised to cut $2 Trillion, so all he needs is another 2000 weeks and he'll get there!
America would rather have DEI and wokeness than Project 2025.
The proof is that Trump was afraid to put them head to head.
The proof is that Trump was afraid to put them head to head.
February 5, 2025 at 8:20 PM
America would rather have DEI and wokeness than Project 2025.
The proof is that Trump was afraid to put them head to head.
The proof is that Trump was afraid to put them head to head.
Healthcare: I have concepts of a plan
Gaza: Here's the blueprints, budget, construction schedule, and stock agreements for a golf course over their bones
(what the f is this world?)
Gaza: Here's the blueprints, budget, construction schedule, and stock agreements for a golf course over their bones
(what the f is this world?)
February 5, 2025 at 1:22 PM
Healthcare: I have concepts of a plan
Gaza: Here's the blueprints, budget, construction schedule, and stock agreements for a golf course over their bones
(what the f is this world?)
Gaza: Here's the blueprints, budget, construction schedule, and stock agreements for a golf course over their bones
(what the f is this world?)
Reposted by Matthew Writes Dumb Stuff
It struck me today that every work of dystopian fiction I've ever read involves a future without books. Maybe that's all it takes.
January 31, 2025 at 8:54 PM
It struck me today that every work of dystopian fiction I've ever read involves a future without books. Maybe that's all it takes.
Reposted by Matthew Writes Dumb Stuff
I honestly believe our most powerful position in a toxic time that feeds on cynicism, apathy,& despair is to genuinely care and act for a better world.
Cynicism is our enemy. We should check it, incl. on the left. It’s not intellectually superior. It’s the virus they’re trying to infect us with. NO
Cynicism is our enemy. We should check it, incl. on the left. It’s not intellectually superior. It’s the virus they’re trying to infect us with. NO
January 31, 2025 at 7:04 PM
I honestly believe our most powerful position in a toxic time that feeds on cynicism, apathy,& despair is to genuinely care and act for a better world.
Cynicism is our enemy. We should check it, incl. on the left. It’s not intellectually superior. It’s the virus they’re trying to infect us with. NO
Cynicism is our enemy. We should check it, incl. on the left. It’s not intellectually superior. It’s the virus they’re trying to infect us with. NO
On the bright side, at least he believes in a medieval version of Christianity that wants to choke out all other religious expression and will surely destroy the US from the inside out. What could possibly go wrong giving him control of the military?
Pete Hegseth is the most unqualified nominee for Secretary of Defense in modern history.
He should be rejected by the Senate.
He should be rejected by the Senate.
January 25, 2025 at 1:49 AM
On the bright side, at least he believes in a medieval version of Christianity that wants to choke out all other religious expression and will surely destroy the US from the inside out. What could possibly go wrong giving him control of the military?
Reposted by Matthew Writes Dumb Stuff
Dear members of the press,
Can one of you, PLEASE just ONE:
When Trump says we deleted all the evidence, please for the love of God, push back. The evidence is all here:
www.govinfo.gov/collection/j...
Can one of you, PLEASE just ONE:
When Trump says we deleted all the evidence, please for the love of God, push back. The evidence is all here:
www.govinfo.gov/collection/j...
Select January 6th Committee Final Report and Supporting Materials Collection
www.govinfo.gov
January 23, 2025 at 12:05 AM
Dear members of the press,
Can one of you, PLEASE just ONE:
When Trump says we deleted all the evidence, please for the love of God, push back. The evidence is all here:
www.govinfo.gov/collection/j...
Can one of you, PLEASE just ONE:
When Trump says we deleted all the evidence, please for the love of God, push back. The evidence is all here:
www.govinfo.gov/collection/j...
Reposted by Matthew Writes Dumb Stuff
The TIFFANY PROBLEM occurs when a historical novel or film contains details that seem too modern to be true but are in fact correct for the time. The name Tiffany is one such example, it dates back to at least the 12th century.
January 23, 2025 at 1:40 PM
The TIFFANY PROBLEM occurs when a historical novel or film contains details that seem too modern to be true but are in fact correct for the time. The name Tiffany is one such example, it dates back to at least the 12th century.
Woke is the new punk. Pass it on.
January 21, 2025 at 5:33 AM
Woke is the new punk. Pass it on.
Steve Bannon said in 2015 that they were going to "flood the channels with shit." Unfortunately it worked.
The media couldn't wait to treat every chunk of poo like breaking news. Which then opened the door for opinions on X to replace "news." Which then opened the door for fake opinions as news.
The media couldn't wait to treat every chunk of poo like breaking news. Which then opened the door for opinions on X to replace "news." Which then opened the door for fake opinions as news.
January 20, 2025 at 11:41 PM
Steve Bannon said in 2015 that they were going to "flood the channels with shit." Unfortunately it worked.
The media couldn't wait to treat every chunk of poo like breaking news. Which then opened the door for opinions on X to replace "news." Which then opened the door for fake opinions as news.
The media couldn't wait to treat every chunk of poo like breaking news. Which then opened the door for opinions on X to replace "news." Which then opened the door for fake opinions as news.
So we're going to be isolationist, expansionist, and stop all wars? Got it.
January 20, 2025 at 7:41 PM
So we're going to be isolationist, expansionist, and stop all wars? Got it.
Um, you ready screenwriters?
According to the NYT, these will become public domain over the next 10 years: Popeye; Pluto; Donald Duck; King Kong (the original film version); Superman; Daffy Duck; James Bond; Batman; Captain Marvel; Bilbo Baggins, Gandalf and others from “The Hobbit.”
According to the NYT, these will become public domain over the next 10 years: Popeye; Pluto; Donald Duck; King Kong (the original film version); Superman; Daffy Duck; James Bond; Batman; Captain Marvel; Bilbo Baggins, Gandalf and others from “The Hobbit.”
January 2, 2025 at 6:21 PM
Um, you ready screenwriters?
According to the NYT, these will become public domain over the next 10 years: Popeye; Pluto; Donald Duck; King Kong (the original film version); Superman; Daffy Duck; James Bond; Batman; Captain Marvel; Bilbo Baggins, Gandalf and others from “The Hobbit.”
According to the NYT, these will become public domain over the next 10 years: Popeye; Pluto; Donald Duck; King Kong (the original film version); Superman; Daffy Duck; James Bond; Batman; Captain Marvel; Bilbo Baggins, Gandalf and others from “The Hobbit.”
Anyone else think "Kill the Dog" is the most pathetic screenwriting book?
The tone is so arrogant. If you can't teach writing, why have most of the literary giants studied writing at college, had mentors, and/or long-term writing groups?
My other thoughts are too unkind to share.
The tone is so arrogant. If you can't teach writing, why have most of the literary giants studied writing at college, had mentors, and/or long-term writing groups?
My other thoughts are too unkind to share.
December 21, 2024 at 4:01 PM
Anyone else think "Kill the Dog" is the most pathetic screenwriting book?
The tone is so arrogant. If you can't teach writing, why have most of the literary giants studied writing at college, had mentors, and/or long-term writing groups?
My other thoughts are too unkind to share.
The tone is so arrogant. If you can't teach writing, why have most of the literary giants studied writing at college, had mentors, and/or long-term writing groups?
My other thoughts are too unkind to share.
Reposted by Matthew Writes Dumb Stuff
Elon Musk has 12 kids and spent Thanksgiving with Donald Trump
November 29, 2024 at 2:46 PM
Elon Musk has 12 kids and spent Thanksgiving with Donald Trump
Chilling. This is what the mass deportations are going to feel like.
(This is Putin's desperate draft in Russia btw).
(This is Putin's desperate draft in Russia btw).
🚨 Russia: Putin regime enforcers raided 3 largest Moscow nightclubs on Friday night —
Simachev, Mutabor/ARMA and Mono.
Many men taken to the military conscription offices.
Women eventually released after their passports were photographed.
Raids with police K9s lasted for hours.
Simachev, Mutabor/ARMA and Mono.
Many men taken to the military conscription offices.
Women eventually released after their passports were photographed.
Raids with police K9s lasted for hours.
November 30, 2024 at 5:55 PM
Chilling. This is what the mass deportations are going to feel like.
(This is Putin's desperate draft in Russia btw).
(This is Putin's desperate draft in Russia btw).
I like Tim Ferris, but I'll be damned if he doesn't look like he
hunted witches in 16th century Europe.
#witches #malleusmaleficarum #4hourworkweek
hunted witches in 16th century Europe.
#witches #malleusmaleficarum #4hourworkweek
November 28, 2024 at 5:27 PM
I like Tim Ferris, but I'll be damned if he doesn't look like he
hunted witches in 16th century Europe.
#witches #malleusmaleficarum #4hourworkweek
hunted witches in 16th century Europe.
#witches #malleusmaleficarum #4hourworkweek
Bad news everyone. Trump's began to drain the swamp of graphic designers and copy editors.
November 26, 2024 at 1:37 AM
Bad news everyone. Trump's began to drain the swamp of graphic designers and copy editors.
I second this. I only like pathetic things.
Also @nikitabier.bsky.social 's X thread on app development advice is also amazing for screenwriters and novelists. 100% recommend.
Also @nikitabier.bsky.social 's X thread on app development advice is also amazing for screenwriters and novelists. 100% recommend.
November 23, 2024 at 6:02 PM
I second this. I only like pathetic things.
Also @nikitabier.bsky.social 's X thread on app development advice is also amazing for screenwriters and novelists. 100% recommend.
Also @nikitabier.bsky.social 's X thread on app development advice is also amazing for screenwriters and novelists. 100% recommend.
X has not sent their best. These Trump trolls r struggles
November 23, 2024 at 5:57 PM
X has not sent their best. These Trump trolls r struggles
So this is why Trump wants tariffs. Finally makes sense. Literally every CEO, including Musk, will groveling with him. It's the ultimate power move.
(from @nytimes.com today) #trump #tariffs
(from @nytimes.com today) #trump #tariffs
November 23, 2024 at 5:23 PM
So this is why Trump wants tariffs. Finally makes sense. Literally every CEO, including Musk, will groveling with him. It's the ultimate power move.
(from @nytimes.com today) #trump #tariffs
(from @nytimes.com today) #trump #tariffs
My heart goes out to all the victims of sexual assault who have to see this. I feel like instead of an elephant the GOP symbol should just be a boot stepping on a woman. The amount of misogyny is staggering. Maybe that's the swamp we need to talk about draining?
Some of the Pete Hegseth story is getting lost because of the Matt Gaetz underage sex trafficking stuff, but what you need to know is he was accused of giving a woman a roofie and raping her in 2017. Then he paid her for her silence.
To review:
ATTORNEY GENERAL: Allegedly paid for sex with multiple women and a 17-year-old girl
SECRETARY OF DEFENSE: Allegedly raped a woman at a conference in 2017
SECRETARY OF HHS: Allegedly sexually assaulted his kids’ baby sitter
ATTORNEY GENERAL: Allegedly paid for sex with multiple women and a 17-year-old girl
SECRETARY OF DEFENSE: Allegedly raped a woman at a conference in 2017
SECRETARY OF HHS: Allegedly sexually assaulted his kids’ baby sitter
November 22, 2024 at 5:01 PM
My heart goes out to all the victims of sexual assault who have to see this. I feel like instead of an elephant the GOP symbol should just be a boot stepping on a woman. The amount of misogyny is staggering. Maybe that's the swamp we need to talk about draining?
Any guys thinking about Ancient Rome today? I heard we're supposed to, but I'm bad at it.
November 22, 2024 at 4:39 PM
Any guys thinking about Ancient Rome today? I heard we're supposed to, but I'm bad at it.