Matt Johnson
@matthewjohnson.bsky.social
aka twoeightnine everywhere else
One thing I appreciate about Bluesky is I can see someone post something like this as an adult and then block them and never worry about seeing their words again
February 6, 2026 at 5:25 AM
One thing I appreciate about Bluesky is I can see someone post something like this as an adult and then block them and never worry about seeing their words again
Hell yeah 9am Manhattans.
I've still got 14 hours and one layover before I get to Anchorage. I've already been up for 5.5 hours. Today is a good day to watch my descent into exhaustion and alcohol.
I've still got 14 hours and one layover before I get to Anchorage. I've already been up for 5.5 hours. Today is a good day to watch my descent into exhaustion and alcohol.
February 4, 2026 at 2:05 PM
Hell yeah 9am Manhattans.
I've still got 14 hours and one layover before I get to Anchorage. I've already been up for 5.5 hours. Today is a good day to watch my descent into exhaustion and alcohol.
I've still got 14 hours and one layover before I get to Anchorage. I've already been up for 5.5 hours. Today is a good day to watch my descent into exhaustion and alcohol.
Picked a window seat today so I could enjoy the winter landscape from ROC to NYC. Saw nothing but deicer the entire flight which I guess is good?
February 4, 2026 at 12:18 PM
Picked a window seat today so I could enjoy the winter landscape from ROC to NYC. Saw nothing but deicer the entire flight which I guess is good?
Ordered pizza from the new wood fired place last night. It was the type of pizza that is delicious but will be an absolute disaster if the person making it is having a rough day.
The bigger problem though is they sent me FOUR emails in 3.5 hours this morning.
Just give me the pizza, nothing else
The bigger problem though is they sent me FOUR emails in 3.5 hours this morning.
Just give me the pizza, nothing else
February 3, 2026 at 7:04 PM
Ordered pizza from the new wood fired place last night. It was the type of pizza that is delicious but will be an absolute disaster if the person making it is having a rough day.
The bigger problem though is they sent me FOUR emails in 3.5 hours this morning.
Just give me the pizza, nothing else
The bigger problem though is they sent me FOUR emails in 3.5 hours this morning.
Just give me the pizza, nothing else
How in the hell did this not see this going over poorly?
February 1, 2026 at 1:38 AM
How in the hell did this not see this going over poorly?
Someone actually bragged about making Joe Brady look like this
January 30, 2026 at 2:46 PM
Someone actually bragged about making Joe Brady look like this
Never trust a man with this haircut
January 29, 2026 at 8:34 PM
Never trust a man with this haircut
Another good one
January 26, 2026 at 6:34 AM
Another good one
Meanwhile, one of the owners of the team in Davos.
Fuck A-Rod. You're never going to earn any respect anywhere.
Fuck A-Rod. You're never going to earn any respect anywhere.
January 26, 2026 at 12:30 AM
Meanwhile, one of the owners of the team in Davos.
Fuck A-Rod. You're never going to earn any respect anywhere.
Fuck A-Rod. You're never going to earn any respect anywhere.
The first image is the one I downloaded. The second image is the one I wanted to make.
Last year I could circle "Antonin Scalia" & select erase & it would do that.
Now thanks to AI I get the third image.
Google completely destroyed its product for no reason or purpose.
Last year I could circle "Antonin Scalia" & select erase & it would do that.
Now thanks to AI I get the third image.
Google completely destroyed its product for no reason or purpose.
January 24, 2026 at 1:19 AM
The first image is the one I downloaded. The second image is the one I wanted to make.
Last year I could circle "Antonin Scalia" & select erase & it would do that.
Now thanks to AI I get the third image.
Google completely destroyed its product for no reason or purpose.
Last year I could circle "Antonin Scalia" & select erase & it would do that.
Now thanks to AI I get the third image.
Google completely destroyed its product for no reason or purpose.
We're two days away from the Bills interviewing Ty Harper and Andy Engler, their high school coaches of the week.
January 23, 2026 at 4:54 PM
We're two days away from the Bills interviewing Ty Harper and Andy Engler, their high school coaches of the week.
January 22, 2026 at 11:50 PM
He looks exactly how you think he would look & is as racist as you'd expect him to be.
January 22, 2026 at 2:32 PM
He looks exactly how you think he would look & is as racist as you'd expect him to be.
I know where my rooting interests are for the rest of the playoffs.
January 18, 2026 at 11:40 PM
I know where my rooting interests are for the rest of the playoffs.
Weird that he wants to protect it from China and not Russia as well. I wonder wh... Oh
January 18, 2026 at 8:44 PM
Weird that he wants to protect it from China and not Russia as well. I wonder wh... Oh
Thinking about how Dick's thought they could sell a basic basketball jersey for $95 because it had Keon Coleman's number and logo(?) on it and now are trying to sell it for $71 at their discount outlet store and
L
O
L
L
O
L
January 17, 2026 at 11:14 PM
Thinking about how Dick's thought they could sell a basic basketball jersey for $95 because it had Keon Coleman's number and logo(?) on it and now are trying to sell it for $71 at their discount outlet store and
L
O
L
L
O
L
Was so close to hitting send...
January 17, 2026 at 11:01 PM
Was so close to hitting send...
Be good.
Do good.
Abolish Ice.
Let's go Buffalo!
It's been 5 years since I've been motivated to design any tshirts but after being tagged repeatedly I realized I could do something quick & give back.
Profits will be given to Buffalo & Rochester area charities.
bit.ly/letsgoabolis... #billsmafia
Do good.
Abolish Ice.
Let's go Buffalo!
It's been 5 years since I've been motivated to design any tshirts but after being tagged repeatedly I realized I could do something quick & give back.
Profits will be given to Buffalo & Rochester area charities.
bit.ly/letsgoabolis... #billsmafia
January 17, 2026 at 7:44 PM
Be good.
Do good.
Abolish Ice.
Let's go Buffalo!
It's been 5 years since I've been motivated to design any tshirts but after being tagged repeatedly I realized I could do something quick & give back.
Profits will be given to Buffalo & Rochester area charities.
bit.ly/letsgoabolis... #billsmafia
Do good.
Abolish Ice.
Let's go Buffalo!
It's been 5 years since I've been motivated to design any tshirts but after being tagged repeatedly I realized I could do something quick & give back.
Profits will be given to Buffalo & Rochester area charities.
bit.ly/letsgoabolis... #billsmafia
Report and block. I went with violence and human trafficking
January 17, 2026 at 12:42 AM
Report and block. I went with violence and human trafficking