Carlos B. Eaton
@someheifer.bsky.social
But that’s not my grandmother, darling, that’s a demon.
📍Chicago
📍Chicago
Someone reached out on sniffies and they were like hey sexy howve you been. I looked at their profile and could not remember how I knew them so I asked them to send me more face pics. They did and said “I hope you haven’t forgetten about me 😜”
Yall I haven’t the slightest idea who this man is
Yall I haven’t the slightest idea who this man is
December 8, 2025 at 3:39 AM
Someone reached out on sniffies and they were like hey sexy howve you been. I looked at their profile and could not remember how I knew them so I asked them to send me more face pics. They did and said “I hope you haven’t forgetten about me 😜”
Yall I haven’t the slightest idea who this man is
Yall I haven’t the slightest idea who this man is
tr*mp with his little medal or whatever is giving Buster Bluth with his awards from army
December 6, 2025 at 9:31 PM
tr*mp with his little medal or whatever is giving Buster Bluth with his awards from army
I just got a text that had a 🎉 emoji in it and my f word ass self was like WTF DO YOU MEAN but then I realized this person was straight and they meant an actual party
December 5, 2025 at 10:24 PM
I just got a text that had a 🎉 emoji in it and my f word ass self was like WTF DO YOU MEAN but then I realized this person was straight and they meant an actual party
I just had to send a “per my last email” email
December 5, 2025 at 9:08 PM
I just had to send a “per my last email” email
IT IS AMERICA THE YEAR OF OUR LORD 2025 AND WOKE IS SO DEAD WE ARE ASLEEP AT OUR DESKS DURING MEETINGS
December 5, 2025 at 2:48 AM
IT IS AMERICA THE YEAR OF OUR LORD 2025 AND WOKE IS SO DEAD WE ARE ASLEEP AT OUR DESKS DURING MEETINGS
This and never hearing one of those AI voiceovers ever again
December 4, 2025 at 10:32 PM
This and never hearing one of those AI voiceovers ever again
Bought Christmas gifts for @imaaronrobert.bsky.social but more importantly I’ve bought Christmas gifts for myself
December 4, 2025 at 1:40 AM
Bought Christmas gifts for @imaaronrobert.bsky.social but more importantly I’ve bought Christmas gifts for myself
@imaaronrobert.bsky.social telling me we should get new phones
December 3, 2025 at 6:10 PM
@imaaronrobert.bsky.social telling me we should get new phones
This is me if you even care
December 2, 2025 at 11:25 PM
This is me if you even care
I had a protein shake for lunch today
December 2, 2025 at 7:25 PM
I had a protein shake for lunch today
As yall know whenever you vague post, imma be in the comments like “tag them” but last night was the first time that I was like “tag them” and the person was very seriously like “well it’s you so…”
December 2, 2025 at 3:39 PM
As yall know whenever you vague post, imma be in the comments like “tag them” but last night was the first time that I was like “tag them” and the person was very seriously like “well it’s you so…”
If I hear Michael Buble one more time
November 29, 2025 at 8:52 PM
If I hear Michael Buble one more time
No shade or whatever but when your hairline starts to make you look like Mao Zedong, just go bald luv it’s okay
November 29, 2025 at 3:41 PM
No shade or whatever but when your hairline starts to make you look like Mao Zedong, just go bald luv it’s okay
Me watching something good happen to one of you when it should be happening to me instead
November 25, 2025 at 1:50 AM
Me watching something good happen to one of you when it should be happening to me instead
Now this? HONEY WHAT IS HAPPENING TODAY LMAO
November 24, 2025 at 5:58 PM
Now this? HONEY WHAT IS HAPPENING TODAY LMAO
Yt gays when im just minding my own damn business
November 24, 2025 at 4:00 PM
Yt gays when im just minding my own damn business
My plans for the weekend
November 23, 2025 at 12:57 AM
My plans for the weekend
Suddenly overcome with h-worditis
November 22, 2025 at 8:27 PM
Suddenly overcome with h-worditis
Maybe yall were right… maybe we don’t need pageants in the year of our lord 2025 🥴 🫠
November 21, 2025 at 4:21 AM
Maybe yall were right… maybe we don’t need pageants in the year of our lord 2025 🥴 🫠
I can fix him 🥰 😍 💕
November 16, 2025 at 3:52 AM
I can fix him 🥰 😍 💕
Him: You better not be Miss Puerto Rico when I get there.
Me:
Me:
November 14, 2025 at 12:55 AM
Him: You better not be Miss Puerto Rico when I get there.
Me:
Me:
@imaaronrobert.bsky.social and I saw you from across the bar and really love your vibe
November 13, 2025 at 2:33 PM
@imaaronrobert.bsky.social and I saw you from across the bar and really love your vibe