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The Ugly Machine

@theuglymachine.bsky.social

9.2K followers 250 following 13K posts

Rust Witch Blacksmithing and metal art Inquiries: [email protected] https://ko-fi.com/theuglymachine

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The Ugly Machine @theuglymachine.bsky.social · Apr 18

New anvil, new pinned post. I'm in my powerful relics era.

My new anvil with a fix your hearts or die tag painted on it

Two knives made with twisted thorny handles

A hand forged chime with five bells made to look like a twisted bouquet of thorny sprigs

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The Ugly Machine @theuglymachine.bsky.social · 1h

Those are so cool! Now you've got me thinking about a stamp to put on the packaging of my finished forged goods

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The Ugly Machine @theuglymachine.bsky.social · 1h

I think I'm going to start with sculpture, but seals are also a great idea!

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The Ugly Machine @theuglymachine.bsky.social · 1h

I don't have the equipment for that currently. they're a little more demanding in terms of geometry which leans more into the world of precision grinding. I'd need a tormek or something similar

The Ugly Machine @theuglymachine.bsky.social · 2h

Hephaestus: also make your own chisels from scratch
me: FINE! OK!

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The Ugly Machine @theuglymachine.bsky.social · 2h

brought to you by my empty right hand triggering a metal detector

The Ugly Machine @theuglymachine.bsky.social · 2h

too big

The Ugly Machine @theuglymachine.bsky.social · 2h

I don't have any piercings but I definitely have enough trace metal in my skin and eyes to count as one or two

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The Ugly Machine @theuglymachine.bsky.social · 2h

I'm gonna pet all of themmm

The Ugly Machine @theuglymachine.bsky.social · 2h

god, I have too much to do, too many projects, how to I get out of this cycle of creative overload?
Hephaestus: you should also get into stone carving
me: yeah ok

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Reposted by The Ugly Machine

Santana Abraxas @slime-golem.biz · 6h

When your whole institution is totally unprepared for the present moment: fuck! No!! Fuckk!!

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The Ugly Machine @theuglymachine.bsky.social · 13h

Gun 13 Raven! Field trip's over! Hope you got enough sun today because it's lights out! That's right, snuggle up for beddy-bye or you'll be headed for a permanent nap! Now hit the racks!

The Ugly Machine @theuglymachine.bsky.social · 3d

Got a job for you, 621. I'm sleepy. Tuck me in for beddy-bye.

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The Ugly Machine @theuglymachine.bsky.social · 15h

They're great! I've already got places for two of them !

The Ugly Machine @theuglymachine.bsky.social · 16h

I got some very cool patches from @nuclearmu5hroom.bsky.social !!

Three hand painted patches, a Mr Yuck, a wonderful big challenges esque gator, and a FIX YOUR HEARTS OR DIE BY MY HAMMER trans pride hammer!! Lfg!

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The Ugly Machine @theuglymachine.bsky.social · 16h

Tech guy: ok so this program goes online and without the consent of anyone it steals all the data so we can sell it.
Second tech guy: we probably shouldn't use the word steal, how do we soft pedal that?
TG1: Flense? Flay? Gouge? Lacerate? Maybe vivisect?
Tg2: we're gonna go with scrape for now

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The Ugly Machine @theuglymachine.bsky.social · 16h

At least we can all agree, anything that uses the word "scrape" to describe what it does is helpful and productive

The Ugly Machine @theuglymachine.bsky.social · 17h

The idea of being fully clothed and covered and even encumbered by lingerie is very funny now that I think about it

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The Ugly Machine @theuglymachine.bsky.social · 17h

Have you ever thought of putting it all on at once like those fundraiser challenges in highschool where you tried to wear the most tee shirts at the same time

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The Ugly Machine @theuglymachine.bsky.social · 18h

Can I hire crode to kill the lamasil toe fungus goblin who opens a toenail like a hatch and hops in

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Reposted by The Ugly Machine

The Ugly Machine @theuglymachine.bsky.social · Jun 18

TRANSPHOBES
EAT SHIT
AND DIE ALONE

My anvil tagged with the same phrase as the post, and I fuckin mean it

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The Ugly Machine @theuglymachine.bsky.social · 19h

eat shit and die alone gavin

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Reposted by The Ugly Machine

The Ugly Machine @theuglymachine.bsky.social · Sep 15

Taking applications for someone to wring out a rag in a basin at my bedside and gently dab my forehead, slowly shaking your head at anyone who comes in the room to ask how I'm doing.

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Reposted by The Ugly Machine

William Hughes @plumberduck.bsky.social · 20h

ICE signing bonuses are UBI for guys who've gotten their photos put up behind the counter at at least three bikini coffee stands.

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Reposted by The Ugly Machine

little lamb @puddleofbrain.bsky.social · 21h

Does the carpet match the firmament

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Reposted by The Ugly Machine

lilith kills u @deathcarpets.sisc.one · 8d

what if something good happened instead

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The Ugly Machine @theuglymachine.bsky.social · 20h

please fix it