Uncle Duke
@uncleduke1969.bsky.social
Does this look infected?
Just My Nonsense:
https://bsky.app/profile/did:plc:2cz6x3e7thlqjc5cxa2hnbsn/feed/aaab3yqtmpox2
My Least Worst:
https://bsky.app/profile/did:plc:2cz6x3e7thlqjc5cxa2hnbsn/feed/aaadpxkw36ag6
Just My Nonsense:
https://bsky.app/profile/did:plc:2cz6x3e7thlqjc5cxa2hnbsn/feed/aaab3yqtmpox2
My Least Worst:
https://bsky.app/profile/did:plc:2cz6x3e7thlqjc5cxa2hnbsn/feed/aaadpxkw36ag6
“I asked you not to do it. I said, Charlie, please don’t make your stupid joke, it’s not funny. But, still, when the waiter brought the check, what did you say? What did you say, Charlie?”
“No thanks, I’ve already got a big bill.”
“It’s like going out to dinner with my father!”
“No thanks, I’ve already got a big bill.”
“It’s like going out to dinner with my father!”
December 16, 2025 at 2:17 PM
“I asked you not to do it. I said, Charlie, please don’t make your stupid joke, it’s not funny. But, still, when the waiter brought the check, what did you say? What did you say, Charlie?”
“No thanks, I’ve already got a big bill.”
“It’s like going out to dinner with my father!”
“No thanks, I’ve already got a big bill.”
“It’s like going out to dinner with my father!”
“Whatcha lookin’ at, Morris?”
“Not a fucking thing, Walter.”
“Not a fucking thing, Walter.”
December 15, 2025 at 1:58 PM
“Whatcha lookin’ at, Morris?”
“Not a fucking thing, Walter.”
“Not a fucking thing, Walter.”
The joy one feels whilst eating the penultimate pancake, knowing that there is yet another to come, is balanced in equal measure by the despair at the realization that there is but one more remaining.
December 14, 2025 at 11:32 PM
The joy one feels whilst eating the penultimate pancake, knowing that there is yet another to come, is balanced in equal measure by the despair at the realization that there is but one more remaining.
“Bambi? Yeah, I know Bambi. Great guy. Fuckin’ shame what happened to his mom. Crap, I’m sorry. You can bleep that out, right?”
December 14, 2025 at 4:20 PM
“Bambi? Yeah, I know Bambi. Great guy. Fuckin’ shame what happened to his mom. Crap, I’m sorry. You can bleep that out, right?”
but sometimes a hot dog is a bird
December 14, 2025 at 1:46 PM
but sometimes a hot dog is a bird
♫ He shouldn’t have run
♫ He shouldn’t have tried
♫ They found coke in the sleigh
♫ And an old forty-five
♫ Santa Claus is going downtown
♫ He shouldn’t have tried
♫ They found coke in the sleigh
♫ And an old forty-five
♫ Santa Claus is going downtown
December 13, 2025 at 4:25 PM
♫ He shouldn’t have run
♫ He shouldn’t have tried
♫ They found coke in the sleigh
♫ And an old forty-five
♫ Santa Claus is going downtown
♫ He shouldn’t have tried
♫ They found coke in the sleigh
♫ And an old forty-five
♫ Santa Claus is going downtown
“Have you brought the list?”
“I have, O Great One.”
“Has it been checked twice?”
“Of course, sir”
“Excellent.”
“Do you require anything further?”
“Bring me an elf, I’m famished.”
“I have, O Great One.”
“Has it been checked twice?”
“Of course, sir”
“Excellent.”
“Do you require anything further?”
“Bring me an elf, I’m famished.”
December 13, 2025 at 2:09 PM
“Have you brought the list?”
“I have, O Great One.”
“Has it been checked twice?”
“Of course, sir”
“Excellent.”
“Do you require anything further?”
“Bring me an elf, I’m famished.”
“I have, O Great One.”
“Has it been checked twice?”
“Of course, sir”
“Excellent.”
“Do you require anything further?”
“Bring me an elf, I’m famished.”
“That’s not how you spell it, sir.”
December 13, 2025 at 1:58 PM
“That’s not how you spell it, sir.”
♫ and a partridge in a bear tree
December 12, 2025 at 6:00 PM
♫ and a partridge in a bear tree
♫ 12 drummers drumming
♫ 11 pipers piping
♫ 10 lords a-leaping
♫ 9 ladies dancing
♫ 8 maids a-milking
♫ 7 swans a-swimming
♫ 6 geese a-laying
♫
♫ 11 pipers piping
♫ 10 lords a-leaping
♫ 9 ladies dancing
♫ 8 maids a-milking
♫ 7 swans a-swimming
♫ 6 geese a-laying
♫
December 12, 2025 at 1:27 PM
♫ 12 drummers drumming
♫ 11 pipers piping
♫ 10 lords a-leaping
♫ 9 ladies dancing
♫ 8 maids a-milking
♫ 7 swans a-swimming
♫ 6 geese a-laying
♫
♫ 11 pipers piping
♫ 10 lords a-leaping
♫ 9 ladies dancing
♫ 8 maids a-milking
♫ 7 swans a-swimming
♫ 6 geese a-laying
♫
Someone’s gotta rein in these evil motherfuckers.
December 12, 2025 at 12:55 PM
Someone’s gotta rein in these evil motherfuckers.
Gambling debts, two divorces, and a cocaine habit had left R2-D2 nearly broke. One night, drunk on White Claws, he drives his Porsche through the front window of a Santa Monica Walgreens, losing both his legs. Finding himself on the street, he now takes odd jobs just to survive.
December 11, 2025 at 8:35 PM
Gambling debts, two divorces, and a cocaine habit had left R2-D2 nearly broke. One night, drunk on White Claws, he drives his Porsche through the front window of a Santa Monica Walgreens, losing both his legs. Finding himself on the street, he now takes odd jobs just to survive.
♫ CARRY ON MY WAYWARD SON ♫
December 11, 2025 at 12:24 PM
♫ CARRY ON MY WAYWARD SON ♫
Any work of art is incomplete without googly eyes.
December 11, 2025 at 12:03 PM
Any work of art is incomplete without googly eyes.
CENTURIES-LONG GLOBAL HOME INVASION SPREE FINALLY ENDS
December 10, 2025 at 6:05 PM
CENTURIES-LONG GLOBAL HOME INVASION SPREE FINALLY ENDS
my wife says my interest in miniature tools is an obsession but i keep telling her that it’s just a little vise
December 10, 2025 at 1:37 PM
my wife says my interest in miniature tools is an obsession but i keep telling her that it’s just a little vise
A slightly tipsy Ursa Marceau does his famous “bear stuck in a box” routine for Santa and the elves at the annual North Pole company Christmas party.
December 9, 2025 at 4:53 PM
A slightly tipsy Ursa Marceau does his famous “bear stuck in a box” routine for Santa and the elves at the annual North Pole company Christmas party.
“I bring you news from the front, m’lord. Food bowls are empty, litter boxes are full, and the natives are getting restless.”
December 9, 2025 at 2:16 PM
“I bring you news from the front, m’lord. Food bowls are empty, litter boxes are full, and the natives are getting restless.”
when the couple across the street is fighting again and you’re trying to listen without looking conspicuous
December 8, 2025 at 8:47 PM
when the couple across the street is fighting again and you’re trying to listen without looking conspicuous
our neighborhoods continue to teem with violent migrant street gangs
December 8, 2025 at 4:17 PM
our neighborhoods continue to teem with violent migrant street gangs
♫ But I would walk 500 miles ♫
♫ And I would walk 500 more ♫
♫ And I would walk 500 more ♫
December 8, 2025 at 1:40 PM
♫ But I would walk 500 miles ♫
♫ And I would walk 500 more ♫
♫ And I would walk 500 more ♫