allison 🫀
@xpurplekidx.bsky.social
25, any pronouns, crazy, scary, spooky, hilarious
Pinned
allison 🫀
@xpurplekidx.bsky.social
· Nov 17
i was banned from twitter almost 2 years ago for telling elon musk to kill himself and so this is my triumphant return to this style of social media
i’m not saying i planned my move to be the same weekend the new phones and ferb season releases, but i am saying it’s awesome i get those days off to watch it while unpacking
May 22, 2025 at 4:54 AM
i’m not saying i planned my move to be the same weekend the new phones and ferb season releases, but i am saying it’s awesome i get those days off to watch it while unpacking
i hate that i fight for my life when a dish has a little too much black pepper in it. i want to like spice!!!!!!
May 3, 2025 at 2:51 AM
i hate that i fight for my life when a dish has a little too much black pepper in it. i want to like spice!!!!!!
i have a problem where i keep thinking rick moranis’s name is mel gibson
April 18, 2025 at 10:22 AM
i have a problem where i keep thinking rick moranis’s name is mel gibson
there’s a leasing company in town that gets the best houses for rent and then says no bully breeds allowed. and i hope their company ceases to exist so i can move
April 7, 2025 at 7:27 PM
there’s a leasing company in town that gets the best houses for rent and then says no bully breeds allowed. and i hope their company ceases to exist so i can move
if there are any zoos with a bear that likes people and needs a friend please let me know. i want to be friends with a bear
March 26, 2025 at 4:54 AM
if there are any zoos with a bear that likes people and needs a friend please let me know. i want to be friends with a bear
can’t stop thinking about the teen at work the other day that said “i can’t help it, i’m drawn to color. i’m just a girl.” she doesn’t know she created my mantra
March 17, 2025 at 5:11 PM
can’t stop thinking about the teen at work the other day that said “i can’t help it, i’m drawn to color. i’m just a girl.” she doesn’t know she created my mantra
concrete jungle wet dream tomato
March 16, 2025 at 11:34 PM
concrete jungle wet dream tomato
my anxiety manifests by convincing me my airpods are actually blaring my music very loudly to everyone around me and i don’t notice it
March 4, 2025 at 1:35 AM
my anxiety manifests by convincing me my airpods are actually blaring my music very loudly to everyone around me and i don’t notice it
i really need to get off meta but the stupid ai prompts keep me thinking
February 27, 2025 at 11:21 PM
i really need to get off meta but the stupid ai prompts keep me thinking
my neighbor’s smoke alarm is going off and that did not stop me from immediately smoking out my window
February 25, 2025 at 2:59 AM
my neighbor’s smoke alarm is going off and that did not stop me from immediately smoking out my window
i mean fuck, i like jokes, i like bits, i like makin funnies, i like goofs, i like to laugh, i like all the giggling and chuckling and ha ha has, i like doing comedy
February 22, 2025 at 2:57 PM
i mean fuck, i like jokes, i like bits, i like makin funnies, i like goofs, i like to laugh, i like all the giggling and chuckling and ha ha has, i like doing comedy
Reposted by allison 🫀
if there’s one thing i can guarantee, it’s that i’m the most purple one at the function. even if i’m not wearing much purple. i just exude violet
February 19, 2025 at 12:19 AM
if there’s one thing i can guarantee, it’s that i’m the most purple one at the function. even if i’m not wearing much purple. i just exude violet
first dr. pepper was revealed to be a woman, now professor plum is rumored to be nonbinary
February 13, 2025 at 4:42 AM
first dr. pepper was revealed to be a woman, now professor plum is rumored to be nonbinary
encountered a child named castiel today. the kids i grew up with on tumblr are multiplying !!
February 12, 2025 at 2:01 AM
encountered a child named castiel today. the kids i grew up with on tumblr are multiplying !!
can we invent a way to brush our teeth that doesn’t make me gag every time
February 11, 2025 at 5:40 PM
can we invent a way to brush our teeth that doesn’t make me gag every time
the first customer i interacted with today asked me a question, and while i was answering it, interrupted me to say, “stop talking, i’ve heard enough.”
February 9, 2025 at 12:31 AM
the first customer i interacted with today asked me a question, and while i was answering it, interrupted me to say, “stop talking, i’ve heard enough.”
had i known about the snoopy watch face on the apple watch, i’d have asked for one a lot sooner. i’ve started calling it my snoopy watch. i mostly check it to see what snoopy’s doing
December 27, 2024 at 5:19 AM
had i known about the snoopy watch face on the apple watch, i’d have asked for one a lot sooner. i’ve started calling it my snoopy watch. i mostly check it to see what snoopy’s doing
Reposted by allison 🫀
Beef Wellington is just a corn dog from a different socioeconomic background.
December 22, 2024 at 2:17 AM
Beef Wellington is just a corn dog from a different socioeconomic background.
today at work i met a woman with twin daughters. the twins have the same birthday as me. when i said as much, the woman goes “no way!!” and then proceeds to tell me that not only is she also a twin, but she also has the same birthday. she gave birth to twins on her birthday, which she already shares
December 13, 2024 at 11:51 PM
today at work i met a woman with twin daughters. the twins have the same birthday as me. when i said as much, the woman goes “no way!!” and then proceeds to tell me that not only is she also a twin, but she also has the same birthday. she gave birth to twins on her birthday, which she already shares
i’m watching game of thrones for the first time. i just watched rains of castamere. holy shit
December 11, 2024 at 4:04 AM
i’m watching game of thrones for the first time. i just watched rains of castamere. holy shit
Reposted by allison 🫀
costco really needs to market to stoners better. i need to buy regular sized bics in bulk please.
December 5, 2024 at 1:49 AM
costco really needs to market to stoners better. i need to buy regular sized bics in bulk please.
every single cat knows the system of a down discography
December 1, 2024 at 4:06 AM
every single cat knows the system of a down discography