Chaotic Rants
chaoticrants.bsky.social
Chaotic Rants
@chaoticrants.bsky.social
210 followers 170 following 1.3K posts
I am desperately trying to think up something witty to put here.
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When you said foliage I was imagining spinach, romaine, arugula. Really creeped me out too. Lol
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if you’re gonna call them blinkers instead of indicators when changing lanes, shouldn’t they be winkers
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Deleted scene from Predator (1987) 😂😂
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Peacock is a terrible name for a boy
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People just fuck up everything by talking politics.
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The West Wing is now just the Wing.
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Assume the best, get burned. Assume the worst, get burned.
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they’re a 10, but their personality is like listening to Americans narrate a soccer game
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The soul-crushing thing of it is knowing that if I went to bed right now and got 9 hours sleep…I’d still be tired tomorrow.
I hate typing "raven" into a search bar and getting the old Cleveland football team in purple uniforms.
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my parenting book would just be a series of sighs of different lengths and varying punctuations for different occasions
I have never been told that I am not funny by someone who has seen me naked.
You've been Mastadumped? 😭
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The deployment of tear gas throughout the Chicago area is a growing health concern. ICE is deploying tear gas in residential neighborhoods, near children, playgrounds, stores, etc. What are the health implications on our communities?
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Hear me out, a website for selling the stuff that you bought when you were too drunk and ergo meet like minded idiots.
I clean out the lint trap before I do laundry because people are lazy.

I clean out the lint trap after I do laundry because I am not one them.
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Can’t spell Uranus without u n us

(Does that make any sense?)
One wrong tug and your entire life unravels.
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I am drunk.

Not bang your Mom with the lights on drunk, but still pretty hammered.
If I did that, it would be too advanced for my parents to understand.
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And so many of them, too! It's almost a standard disclaimer at this point.
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Add me to your Wi$h Li$t 🔥📝
I do. My birthday is just another day closer to laying in a hospital bed, begging people to unplug me.