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phil mccrevice

@jewkrainian.bsky.social

6.5K followers 980 following 16K posts

30 something Software Engineer Ohio escapee (cleveland sports) An idiot who types things Denver📍 (eng/rus) just my skeets https://bsky.app/profile/did:plc:tfg6pbtryl7sb4kcaytrz7tq/feed/aaaem3hzwrdig NGL https://ngl.link/ledhead

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phil mccrevice @jewkrainian.bsky.social · Jan 25

genie: and for your last wish?

me: I wish I could talk to animals

[later at the zoo]

elephant: get me the fuck out of here

gorilla: get me the fuck out of here

giraffe: get me the fuck out of here

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phil mccrevice @jewkrainian.bsky.social · 11h

if you ever needed to trap me for some reason, literally just put a cinnamon roll under a box like i’m some kind of idiot squirrel. it would work every time

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phil mccrevice @jewkrainian.bsky.social · 11h

i did it, i solved world peace

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phil mccrevice @jewkrainian.bsky.social · 11h

*sprays you with spray bottle*

phil mccrevice @jewkrainian.bsky.social · 12h

for the people

my forearm with various tattoos (sunflower on hand, a sickle through hearts, a wolf head with arrow through it, a book with a cowboy on the front, and a flower in the elbow ditch)

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phil mccrevice @jewkrainian.bsky.social · 12h

i’ll post forearm if morale gets low

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phil mccrevice @jewkrainian.bsky.social · 13h

listen, the hands I KNOW have power. i only use them for good

phil mccrevice @jewkrainian.bsky.social · 13h

morty old skeet:

slutty little nose ring smh

phil mccrevice @jewkrainian.bsky.social · 13h

wait guys i’ve never considered my avi to be a thirst trap and now my ego is insatiable

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phil mccrevice @jewkrainian.bsky.social · 13h

there are thirst traps everywhere for those with eyes to see

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Reposted by phil mccrevice

(spoo)key 👻 @kmillz.lol · 17h

[james bond voice]

the name’s goose. silly goose.

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Reposted by phil mccrevice

Scissors @rningscissors.bsky.social · 22h

you think the other 3 burners on my stove are jealous of the chosen one?

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Reposted by phil mccrevice

alexis simpson @amutepiggy.bsky.social · 1d

(spooky ghost voice) boooooofing

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phil mccrevice @jewkrainian.bsky.social · 23h

yeah, mecha-squids. who would have thought?

phil mccrevice @jewkrainian.bsky.social · 23h

march 22, 2306

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phil mccrevice @jewkrainian.bsky.social · 23h

i can taste the space time continuum

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phil mccrevice @jewkrainian.bsky.social · 23h

i knowwwwww he was definitely super bummed, but it was so weird

phil mccrevice @jewkrainian.bsky.social · 23h

so far everything burns, but i think i can see the future

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Reposted by phil mccrevice

The Amytyville Horror @msfoxifurnasty.bsky.social · 1d

i frequently open the internet, get distracted by one of my open tabs and forget what i was going to search for so no, your honor, i cannot repeat my statement