Lightnews — Scholar-powered news

blank @misterblank.bsky.social · 22h

mike johnson looks like a creepy doll

2

blank @misterblank.bsky.social · 7d

welp still haven’t been awarded a nobel prize guess i have no choice but to take it out on EVERYONE.

1 20

blank @misterblank.bsky.social · 10d

oh i see you’re pre-stuffed. well, enjoy your weird hobby of defending kyle rittenhouse on the internet.

blank @misterblank.bsky.social · 10d

ope found a rittenhouse fanboy. do you cosplay? how much stuffing do you have to wad in your cheeks to get that angry baby look?

1

blank @misterblank.bsky.social · 10d

move over kyle rittenhouse there’s a new republican poster boy in town

Alejandra Caraballo @esqueer.net · 10d

A MAGA teenager was spurned by a teen girl so he sent pizza to her home to intimidate her. The police ignored it.

Then, he saw she mocked Charlie Kirk so he murdered her and her friend by ramming his truck into them at 70mph while they were riding their bikes.

He's now charged with murder.

1 3 5

blank @misterblank.bsky.social · 14d

in the clearing stands a boxer? bullshit boxers don’t go there.

2

blank @misterblank.bsky.social · 17d

where are the vantablack contact lenses. i want to look how i feel.

1

blank @misterblank.bsky.social · 18d

psh amateurs. personally i dread all times of day and night.

1

Reposted by blank

blank @misterblank.bsky.social · Jul 23

continually remembering how biden sat on his wrinkly old hands while merrick garland napped for four years because he was afraid he’d be accused of weaponizing the justice department.

2 6

blank @misterblank.bsky.social · 21d

closing my office door just to cry a little

1

blank @misterblank.bsky.social · 23d

if only there was a public figure who exemplified this phenomenon

1

blank @misterblank.bsky.social · 23d

there is no evidence that tylenol causes autism but there is a LOT of evidence that being born rich and unloved by your parents causes sociopathic narcissism.

1 9

blank @misterblank.bsky.social · 24d

so you’re saying the evangelist christians will disappear and the rest of us will be left behind without them? oh nooooo.

1 4

blank @misterblank.bsky.social · 27d

me: they cancelled jimmy kimmel.

chuck schumer: oh no.

me: yeah it-

check schumer: i was gonna go on there to promote my book.

4

blank @misterblank.bsky.social · 28d

trump white house taking a strong stance against [checks notes] opposing fascism.

6 15

blank @misterblank.bsky.social · Sep 15

“there can be no UNITY with those who believe in facts, because up is down and left is right and if you disagree you’re a terrorist”

1

blank @misterblank.bsky.social · Sep 15

“there can be no UNITY with those who believe couches should only be for SITTING”

1 1

Reposted by blank

born miserable @bornmiserable.bsky.social · May 10

I like how people say "manage your depression" like it's a stock portfolio but you're heavily invested in sadness

39 430 1.5K

blank @misterblank.bsky.social · Sep 14

one microaggression after another punctuated by the occasional macroaggression for funzies.

2 2

blank @misterblank.bsky.social · Sep 14

it’s my party and i’ll cry if i want to. and also if i don’t want to. honestly i’m not even having a party. just sitting around. crying.

1 1 2

blank @misterblank.bsky.social · Sep 12

me: [hearing the news about charlie kirk] oh my god…i just realized he had two first names.

2

Reposted by blank

Swim Jeans 👖 @shortsleevesuit.bsky.social · Sep 11

Did anyone really believe he’d stop with couches

6 22 140

blank @misterblank.bsky.social · Sep 12

mars: look i have life on m-

earth: not NOW mars.

2 4

Reposted by blank

more mr. dice guy @juniorhoncho.bsky.social · Sep 11

dan bongino and kash patel lying unconscious on the ground after bonking their heads together as they both bent down to examine what is later determined to be their own footprints

15 1.4K 8.4K

Reposted by blank

Stone Cold Jane Austen @abbyhiggs.bsky.social · Sep 11

MAGA 3 days ago: Chicago is about to find out the meaning of WAR

MAGA today: the left needs to stop condoning violence

95 6K 20K