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Anthony D. Herrera @aherrera.bsky.social · 11h

Here lies Jez Gordon. He died trying to fuck them all.

Anthony D. Herrera @aherrera.bsky.social · 11h

That's the worst possible outcome. Jez, if we don't share a common ethical framework then meaningful communication is all but impossible.

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Anthony D. Herrera @aherrera.bsky.social · 11h

Jez, please don't fuck or smoke a Pokémon.

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Anthony D. Herrera @aherrera.bsky.social · 11h

Hey guys if you're bored tonight and looking for something to do why not try recreational drug use or sex? Both are really big in Japan right now and I have a feeling it's going to be like Pokémon all over again.

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Anthony D. Herrera @aherrera.bsky.social · 13h

Nostalgia is a poison so I've lived my life as horribly as possible so I don't have anything to look back on or forward to. It's precision existence, folks, and even the Angels are jealous of me.

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Anthony D. Herrera @aherrera.bsky.social · 13h

The Rule of Jenny Pen and Bring Her Back are recent Kiwi and Aussie films respectively that both feature scenes where someone pours piss on a sleeping persons crotch to make it look like they've pissed themselves and I'm just wondering what the fuck is going on down there?

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Anthony D. Herrera @aherrera.bsky.social · 13h

Bloody Mary and Mothman’s child may be half vengeance spirit and half anthropoidal-insect but he’s my godson and the Christening was beautiful.

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Anthony D. Herrera @aherrera.bsky.social · 13h

Best Fwends- Blood

Just a song about blood. Felt Halloweeny. I know nothing about the band. It's been 16 years. They could be dead by now. Or Nazis. Probably Nazis. It's always Nazis. www.youtube.com/watch?v=6WlP...

BEST FWENDS - BLOOD

YouTube video by BMRC OLDIES

www.youtube.com

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Anthony D. Herrera @aherrera.bsky.social · 19h

People don't realize how smart crows are. There's one that's been blackmailing me for the past five years. He forces me to commit targeted arsons to enrich his investment portfolio. Honestly, I don't even remember what he has on me anymore. I just do it now because he's such a fun boss.

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Reposted by Anthony D. Herrera

Anthony D. Herrera @aherrera.bsky.social · 1d

Don't even try to trap me in a corn maze, bro. I'll eat all the corn.

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Anthony D. Herrera @aherrera.bsky.social · 1d

Oingo Boingo- No One Lives Forever

Texas Chainsaw Massacre 2 just rocks so fucking hard. Tobe Hooper fully recognized that Reagan won and has his band of killers embrace that ethos by monetizing their hobby and getting rich. We all aspire to be the Sawyers now. www.youtube.com/watch?v=G1Gw...

Oingo Boingo No One Lives Forever TEXAS CHAINSAW MASSACRE 2 Monster Montage nubbins theme

YouTube video by NUBBINS SAWYER'S NUBB CLUB

www.youtube.com

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Anthony D. Herrera @aherrera.bsky.social · 1d

Just realized that One Battle After Another is basically a gritty reboot of My Two Dads.

Anthony D. Herrera @aherrera.bsky.social · 1d

Well, that does sound like fun, but I was just going to take it easy today.

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Anthony D. Herrera @aherrera.bsky.social · 1d

Some pictures of Fucked Up Ape Boy Chad from the 1991 British miniseries Chimera

Close Up of fucked up Ape Boy Chad from the 1991 miniseries Chimera

Action shot of fucked up Ape Boy Chad wielding a child as a weapon from the 1991 miniseries Chimera

Sad close up of fucked up Ape Boy Chad from the 1991 miniseries Chimera

Side view of Fucked Up Ape Boy Chad's long face from the 1991 miniseries Chimera

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Anthony D. Herrera @aherrera.bsky.social · 1d

Do you even realize how many violent murders had to happen in close proximity to each other on this farm so that the ENTIRE hayride is haunted?

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Anthony D. Herrera @aherrera.bsky.social · 1d

Don't even try to trap me in a corn maze, bro. I'll eat all the corn.

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Anthony D. Herrera @aherrera.bsky.social · 1d

Out on the porch. 2:00 AM. The ice cream truck has returned. The Smiling Man sells raw chupacabra meat in waffle cones. The pulsating flesh sprays droplets of blood that scorch permanent shadow where they fall. So, I asked for a snow cone instead. Fucker wanted ten bucks. Can you believe that shit?

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Anthony D. Herrera @aherrera.bsky.social · 1d

Why he does this I cannot say. To understand his motives means to comprehend pandemonium and in such a state I too would find myself in the dead of night in the homes of strange men carefully perfuming their robust, chin-based masculinity. I thank this man. I pity this man. I fear this man.

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Anthony D. Herrera @aherrera.bsky.social · 1d

My beard has been smelling fantastic recently. Can't explain it. Not doing anything different. My best theory is that while I sleep, some sort of Midnight Mister creeps into my room and rubs potions and sumptuous essences into my facial hair.

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Anthony D. Herrera @aherrera.bsky.social · 2d

You Can Get Him Frankenstein-The Castle Kings

Song about a dude whose girlfriend is constantly kidnapped by monsters, so he gets his buddy Frankenstein's Monster to rescue her repeatedly until she cuts out the middleman and starts fucking the creature.

www.youtube.com/watch?v=KSSj...

YOU CAN GET HIM, FRANKENSTEIN - The Castle Kings

YouTube video by DumDumDeDip

www.youtube.com

Anthony D. Herrera @aherrera.bsky.social · 2d

You Can Get Him, Frankenstein- Castle Kings

Song about a dude whose girlfriend is constantly kidnapped by monsters, so he gets his buddy Frankenstein's Monster to rescue her repeatedly until the girlfriend cuts out the middleman and starts fucking the creature. www.youtube.com/watch?v=KSSj...

YOU CAN GET HIM, FRANKENSTEIN - The Castle Kings

YouTube video by DumDumDeDip

www.youtube.com

Anthony D. Herrera @aherrera.bsky.social · 2d

Little doodle of a Manananggal from Filipino mythology drawn a while back by my friend Lala

Demonic Manananggal, a creature from Filipino mythology, which is the top half of a bare breasted woman with bat wings growing from her back and her entrails dragging beneath the rip in her body.

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Anthony D. Herrera @aherrera.bsky.social · 2d

Had a telehealth consult with a doctor about my hand wounds that bleed candy corn.

"Spooky Stigmata," he said.

"What does it mean?" I asked

"You're The Halloween Christ."

"What do we do?"

"As a man of science, I must find you and kill you," he said, closing his laptop.

U.S. Healthcare sucks.

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Anthony D. Herrera @aherrera.bsky.social · 3d

Nightmare Nightmare Nightmare Nightmare Nightmare

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Anthony D. Herrera @aherrera.bsky.social · 3d

If E.T. The Extraterrestrial did kill people it would be the scariest monster in movie history. Just imagine E.T. screaming and flailing at you with a straight razor saying "ouch" every time it cut into your flesh. I don't want that to happen to me and that's how you know something is scary.

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