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Ben Kenobi's Beard @benkenobisbeard.bsky.social · 1d

I read that as "rubles" and it works that way too.

a man in a suit and white shirt is sitting in front of a red wall .

ALT: a man in a suit and white shirt is sitting in front of a red wall .

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Ben Kenobi's Beard @benkenobisbeard.bsky.social · 1d

Alt headline: "France not done showing America how democracy is supposed to work."

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Ben Kenobi's Beard @benkenobisbeard.bsky.social · 2d

Trump is Shooter McGavin

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Ben Kenobi's Beard @benkenobisbeard.bsky.social · 2d

Grabbing that penis and publicly wrestling with it? ALSO lewd conduct.

a woman holding a cell phone with the words you 're under arrest

ALT: a woman holding a cell phone with the words you 're under arrest

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Ben Kenobi's Beard @benkenobisbeard.bsky.social · 2d

Ladies and gentlemen, shut it down. We have our winner.

a happy boss 's day card with colorful confetti

ALT: a happy boss 's day card with colorful confetti

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Ben Kenobi's Beard @benkenobisbeard.bsky.social · 2d

This 5-dimensional chess player figured out when people say "no kings" they are specifically talking about him.

He's onto us, guys.

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Ben Kenobi's Beard @benkenobisbeard.bsky.social · 2d

Or if you like Vietnamese noodles, no...

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Ben Kenobi's Beard @benkenobisbeard.bsky.social · 2d

Pun intended? Cuz I'm gonna say pun *very* intended.

Well done.

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Ben Kenobi's Beard @benkenobisbeard.bsky.social · 3d

MORANS!

Ben Kenobi's Beard @benkenobisbeard.bsky.social · 3d

Wait, so the high-stakes, geopolitically-complex, painstakingly-researched, Nobel-prize-worthy solution to stopping wars is...

Telling them to stop?

Wow.

I haven't been this disappointed since I waited 2 weeks for Trump's healthcare and infrastructure plans.

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Ben Kenobi's Beard @benkenobisbeard.bsky.social · 3d

Or even non-violent right wing groups, because hey it's the laaaaaawww

Ben Kenobi's Beard @benkenobisbeard.bsky.social · 3d

This has never been more true:

Terminator: "It's in your nature to destroy yourselves."

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Ben Kenobi's Beard @benkenobisbeard.bsky.social · 3d

Divorced?

Wow, that's hard to believe.

a close up of a woman 's face with a bun on her head .

ALT: a close up of a woman 's face with a bun on her head .

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Ben Kenobi's Beard @benkenobisbeard.bsky.social · 4d

"My mother? Let me tell you about my mother."

a man in a hospital gown is sitting in front of a wall with the word rp written on it

ALT: a man in a hospital gown is sitting in front of a wall with the word rp written on it

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Ben Kenobi's Beard @benkenobisbeard.bsky.social · 4d

Preposterous could be his middle name, and he still wouldn't be able to spell it correctly.

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Ben Kenobi's Beard @benkenobisbeard.bsky.social · 8d

The Fallujah Five opening for The Sarajevo Swingers

Ben Kenobi's Beard @benkenobisbeard.bsky.social · 8d

If you unscramble "stephanopoulos" you get "handed the VP his ass".

It checks out.

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Ben Kenobi's Beard @benkenobisbeard.bsky.social · 10d

"Nobody marks you" is such a Shakespearean dis track.

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Ben Kenobi's Beard @benkenobisbeard.bsky.social · 11d

By this logic, antifa runs Florida during hurricane season.

Ben Kenobi's Beard @benkenobisbeard.bsky.social · 13d

I liked Breaking Bad better the first time I saw it, when it was called "Titanic"

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Ben Kenobi's Beard @benkenobisbeard.bsky.social · 15d

"your honor forgot to make us pinkie swear, no take-backs"

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Ben Kenobi's Beard @benkenobisbeard.bsky.social · 15d

I hate it when sci-fi accurately predicts a bleak future:

"Our conflict also started with a fight for freedoms. We called it the Second Civil War, then the Eugenics War, and finally, just... World War III. This was our last day."

a man in a yellow shirt with the words the choice is yours

ALT: a man in a yellow shirt with the words the choice is yours

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Ben Kenobi's Beard @benkenobisbeard.bsky.social · 16d

I'm with Tuunbaq on this one.

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Ben Kenobi's Beard @benkenobisbeard.bsky.social · 17d

EOs carry all the weight of a signed piece of toilet paper