Old Turty Bastard
@bwhiz.bsky.social
830 followers 580 following 5.5K posts
I’m just tryna make my momma proud. I ain’t tryna let my momma down. 🧔🏽‍♀️🐻🌊🛶💅🏼🎿🏔️🎨🏕️⛓️🚴🏼‍♂️🍻 Not here to argue Leadville, CO
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Last night was easily my most efficient Red Rocks exit. I texted my girlfriend that we were getting on 70 at 10:20 and that included grabbing 3 chicken sandies for the road 💪🏼
So sick! I’m struggling at work today though lol
It’s important to insist on taking selfies with your boys
The most debilitating aspect of my color blindness is that I can never tell the difference between the red and green on port o potty doors 😔
lol we got to the lot way tomorrow early and it’s pretty much empty. Things are a little different for non jam bands
I’ll be honest, I don’t know what it means but it’s definitely a tasty boi 🍻
#sippin on a road soda omw to Parcels
I’m leaving for work and it 20° rn. As much shit as I’ve been talking about being ready for ski season, I’m not ready to be leaving for work in the negatives 😞☝🏼
Kevin Federline gave me hope that maybe one day I could possibly date a famous pop star
Daddy Fat Stacks is back 😤💪🏼🍻
Just finished Oathbringer 🗡️
Just got a Facebook memory of this 2 Chainz stencil I made 12 years ago ⛓️
It’s the only way to eat wings, brother 🫡
Northside Pizza in Breck. Mango habanero and smoky peach 🍗
The haters are absolutely furious rn
I was at that show!!! I remember they asked something about a naked guy during run like an antelope bc there had been a streaker during antelope when they played in Charlottesville!
I didn’t know how to react to the compliment so I just flopped my dick around like Jason Segel does in Forgetting Sarah Marshall and then flexed at my girlfriend. Whole drive to work I was asking myself why 😔