Missile is such a pessimistic name. They should call them hittles

ERROR REPORT: computer shutdown unexpectedly

USER (a fucking moron): ok why did it do that

COMPUTER (brilliant pinnacle of technology): idk i was turned off or some shit

they should invent a computer that can tell you what the fuck is wrong with it when it's not working right

(dejectedly, ashamed): yeah... that is what i meant...

I don't seriouspost that much anymore, mostly because I'm tired and more cynical about the efficacy of the effort, but I'll give it a try for old time's sake.

It has been de rigueur for many professional posters to insist on participating in American democratic processes as a remedy for discontent.

DENNIS REYNOLDS: so then I chime in with the "haven't you people ever heard of closing the GOD DAMN door? No?"

*MOCKINGLY*
it's much better to face these kinds of things with a sense of poise and dignity

Could you call them up to defend your people against ICE and the cops? There are no rules anymore, get creative and have FUN

they are called pine trees because everyone wants them

the rabbits are finally back

new virus infects your heart and uses your pulse to mine bitcoin

i think it's fucked up when a spider web is packed full of bugs but the spider clearly has abandoned the web. they should have to take it down before they leave. that's gotta be a violation of bug law

each day lightning from hell strikes me in my head, face, back and penis and it would kill a weaker man but satan is only slowing me down

if elected i vow to make nuremberg look like an episode of fuckin matlock

ugh why did they add Pizza Tower running to Silksong

In the future, every game will either have no ending or an uncountably large number of endings. games will experiment with things like having several middles or no beginnings

by the way here at FioFiorello LLC we believe in Great Ape Personhood

Jane Goodall, ethologist and conservationist, has died. She was 91

The rapid corporate takeover of the FGC is destroying both the community and the games themselves. The only things left in the FGC will be the fighting and the greasy bloody money

im trying to remarket lobotomy

Buy one get one free? Yeah that's how it works. You pay for it then it's free

next time you wanna be really bored give it a spin

genuinely convinced that no one's actually played Half Life 2 and everyone's just pretending to like it