Flum
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flumcake.bsky.social
Flum
@flumcake.bsky.social
I had talent in a previous life.
Are “hens” electric?
January 31, 2026 at 6:46 AM
I can only assume Gail Porter absolutely hates her skirt given her clear refusal to come down from the coverage of the balcony. #totp
January 30, 2026 at 7:49 PM
Pleased to see it’s been confirmed that Clueless is culturally, historically, and aesthetically significant. Not that there was ever any doubt, mind.
January 30, 2026 at 2:22 PM
In the office and a couple of guys behind me are having a loud conversation and have just used the phrase “You know how women can be”.
January 30, 2026 at 11:37 AM
Roses are red
Koalas are grey
January 30, 2026 at 11:16 AM
And a big well done to everyone who’s managed to resist going for “I REQUIRE A TUG”.
tag yourself i’m I AM MANOEUVRING WITH DIFFICULTY
January 30, 2026 at 10:30 AM
In the space of five days I’m now going to be seeing Wet Leg with English Teacher supporting, My Chemical Romance, the Super Furry Animals with the Beta Band supporting, and Garbage. I genuinely don’t think I’m going to be able to cope with such a constant stream of amazingness
January 30, 2026 at 10:28 AM
This morning I need to simultaneously try and get tickets for both Garbage and Saint Etienne for what will - likely - be their last ever gigs. I’m sure this is going to end well.
January 30, 2026 at 8:33 AM
At this rate Reform are going to make bringing back the teenage rite of passage of drinking a bottle of cheap vodka in the local park then being fingered next to the swings a key pledge in their manifesto.
January 30, 2026 at 7:01 AM
Well that was a night of sleep that basically didn’t happen. I look forward to spending today tired, grumpy and being irrationally irked by even the most minor of inconveniences.
January 30, 2026 at 6:46 AM
Well, I am an absolute idiot and misread the 16:00 start time as 6PM and so have just tuned in to discover I’ve missed the entirety of the England vs South Africa netball match. Grr! I now hope it was a rubbish game and I didn’t miss out on anything exciting.
January 29, 2026 at 6:01 PM
I think I’ve found the world’s most ludicrously priced VIP package.
January 29, 2026 at 4:12 PM
Sainsbury’s are attempting to get on the romantic baked goods train, but I’m not sure that telling the recipient that they’re directly comparable to a muffin is an ideal sentiment.

(They are pretty tasty though)
January 29, 2026 at 1:54 PM
Reposted by Flum
Fantastic, pointed, and written with furious élan. She v good.

open.substack.com/pub/grainnem...
Five things the film “Is This Thing On?” gets wrong about the world of stand up.
Stand-up comedy is not about constantly talking about your feelings; if it was-why would straight men be so successful at it?
open.substack.com
January 29, 2026 at 8:35 AM
To be fair, I can’t do a lot of these things either.
January 29, 2026 at 8:03 AM
Quite enjoying the passive aggressive nature of this section of the promo blurb for a Vanessa Carlton gig, which basically says “Yes, she’ll play it, but she has done other stuff, y’know.”
January 27, 2026 at 10:12 PM
The best damn album.
January 27, 2026 at 7:11 PM
Reposted by Flum
Hit me Paul Shane one more time
January 27, 2026 at 8:29 AM
At school there was no greater status symbol than owning a set of scented felt tip pens.
January 27, 2026 at 12:37 PM
I’m reasonably sure that it’s not an either/or situation and other options are available.
January 27, 2026 at 7:54 AM
My full page advert in the Wall Street Journal saying "I’m not a Nazi" has people asking a lot of questions already answered by my full page advert in the Wall Street Journal.
January 27, 2026 at 7:41 AM
This Sydney Sweeney story is a storm in a D cup.
January 26, 2026 at 9:03 PM
Mark Ronson has never, and will never, do anything better than Bang Bang Bang.

youtu.be/TM6TCGltfHM?...
Mark Ronson, The Business Intl. - Bang Bang Bang (Official Video) ft. MNDR
YouTube video by MarkRonsonVEVO
youtu.be
January 26, 2026 at 7:51 PM
In a secret - and, to be fair, unknown - Traitors twist, Amanda used to work with Jade’s boyfriend’s dad! I hope she isn’t now going to try and split them up by telling him that she always thought Jade was a wrong ‘un. #TheTraitors #TheTraitorsUK

www.instagram.com/reel/DT-WrqR...
Amanda Collier on Instagram: "Wow this is insane! What are the chances ??Sorry about the very dodgy video! We couldn’t get anything to work ! But you get the point!"
11K likes, 117 comments - itsmeamandacollier on January 26, 2026: "Wow this is insane! What are the chances ??Sorry about the very dodgy video! We couldn’t get anything to work ! But you get the point...
www.instagram.com
January 26, 2026 at 5:13 PM
Forgot to bring my water bottle in to work with me today.
January 26, 2026 at 9:09 AM