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monkeybutter.bsky.social @monkeybutter.bsky.social · 5h

October is Halloween month. I don't make the rules. It just is. And I love it.
Christmas on the other hand can f all the way off. Just a to do list of obligations both social & financial but with a shiny backdrop. Maybe with a vomiting Santa nearby.

a halloween scene with a pumpkin and cotton candy in the foreground

ALT: a halloween scene with a pumpkin and cotton candy in the foreground

media.tenor.com

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monkeybutter.bsky.social @monkeybutter.bsky.social · 9h

'jumpers for goalposts'

a man in a suit and tie is sitting in front of a green wall and saying `` marvellous '' .

ALT: a man in a suit and tie is sitting in front of a green wall and saying `` marvellous '' .

media.tenor.com

monkeybutter.bsky.social @monkeybutter.bsky.social · 9h

Didn't she suggest that if they want to learn English they should use Duolingo?
I've been trying to learn German for two years off that app and I guarantee it can't be the only resource used.
One of many phrases it taught me was "Who is more attractive? Snoopy or Yoda?" so that's how it's going.

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monkeybutter.bsky.social @monkeybutter.bsky.social · 9h

Remembering the time my other half's autocorrect asked an animal rights group for advice on how to train a 'dead' dog after we took on a deaf dachshund.

monkeybutter.bsky.social @monkeybutter.bsky.social · 10h

My uncle died last year from complications of COVID. He tried his best to protect not only himself but his family too.
His lungs were so scarred from a previous infection, when he had a non COVID infection later, he wasn't able to receive treatment that would have saved his life.

monkeybutter.bsky.social @monkeybutter.bsky.social · 10h

This might just be something in my particular end, but it's genuinely scary how little they care. It's beyond not caring because they know what it can do. They appear to prioritise their social lives, actively downplaying the facts they absolutely do know about.

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monkeybutter.bsky.social @monkeybutter.bsky.social · 10h

Others have had symptoms but not wanted to test themselves. They've then attended public functions in close proximity.
They've attended hospital appointments, gone out to dinner, gone to pubs, met with family.
Some put another family member in hospital with COVID because they wouldn't isolate.

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monkeybutter.bsky.social @monkeybutter.bsky.social · 10h

I paid for one recently, but putting large barriers like this to obtaining protection is just dangerous.
One thing I have noticed is that the worst people I know for neglecting to protect others are people 85+.
I had to explain to one relative that it's not just a bad cold like she was convinced of

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Reposted

Smooth Dunk @smoothdunk2.bsky.social · 17h

the US government has arrived on bluesky

4 panel comic

Panel 1: A group of people just having a lovely time. Everyone is laughing

Panel 2: An absolute Federal Agent appears in the middle of the group laughing like an obnoxious robot

Panel 3: The group quickly disperses, leaving the gross creepy agent by himself

Panel 4: The agent touches his ear and says “arrest their moms”

180 4.5K 18K

monkeybutter.bsky.social @monkeybutter.bsky.social · 15h

I have a relative that thrives on social interactions & doesn't understand why I don't.
If they haven't been out of the house for a day, they get annoyed.
They use phrases like "these four walls" in a negative way when I look at my home and blissfully think 'ah, these four walls'.

monkeybutter.bsky.social @monkeybutter.bsky.social · 19h

'Weirdo bloke' is exactly the insult I'd expect to hear from an out of touch rich guy. I can hear it in the voice of Tim Nice But Dim more than any other.

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monkeybutter.bsky.social @monkeybutter.bsky.social · 22h

That's what I'm hoping. He may have peaked too soon.
Also, people in polls say a lot of things from a position of relative safety. But when it actually comes to making a decision at an election, people tend to do differently.
Early polls are typically for people to express their displeasure.

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monkeybutter.bsky.social @monkeybutter.bsky.social · 1d

"Nice aliveness you've got there. Shame if something happened to it" - US healthcare system

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Reposted

Indy lass @pixie11.bsky.social · 2d

Sick of people shouting Farage is our saviour, Well, time they heard it from the horse's mouth, this liar is not to be trusted.
Looking at some of them, they look like they're never away from a doctor, and no deep pockets to pay.
REFORM VOTERS, WAKEN UP!
👇👇

youtube.com/shorts/TN3lG...

Farage / Reform wants to privatise the NHS

YouTube video by National Rejoin March

youtube.com

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monkeybutter.bsky.social @monkeybutter.bsky.social · 2d

Whenever I order something online and I get an email saying "we've got your parcel" from Evri, it gives me the same vibes as if they'd just told me they duct taped it to the back of a drunk buzzard.

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monkeybutter.bsky.social @monkeybutter.bsky.social · 3d

It's like acknowledging that your house is flooded because a pipe burst in your bathroom, but then going on to say you're going to improve the situation by tightening the taps and removing the toilet.

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monkeybutter.bsky.social @monkeybutter.bsky.social · 4d

Do you think he's just been so bombarded with photoshopped pictures of his younger, less flappy face on ripped, muscular bodies that he's actually just super shocked to see an undoctored one?

monkeybutter.bsky.social @monkeybutter.bsky.social · 4d

So what they're saying is not that they now think Brexit is a bad thing. But that they can now SAY that Brexit is a bad thing.
That they knew all along but didn't have the courage to say what was clear to so many for so long, until it was deemed safe enough politically.

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monkeybutter.bsky.social @monkeybutter.bsky.social · 4d

Thank you, that's so nice 🙂

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monkeybutter.bsky.social @monkeybutter.bsky.social · 4d

'Guy who shat on your carpet calls to tell you your living room smells'

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monkeybutter.bsky.social @monkeybutter.bsky.social · 4d

When I drive longer distances than normal and have to rely on my satnav, I count the exits on the roundabout like the count because it helps me concentrate on getting the right one. I make whoever is in the car with me count with me.
As I take the right exit we have to go 'ah ah ah'

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monkeybutter.bsky.social @monkeybutter.bsky.social · 4d

I couldn't stop watching how even the right wing Italian leader looked so uncomfortable with this.

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monkeybutter.bsky.social @monkeybutter.bsky.social · 5d

That's fantastic. 💚

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monkeybutter.bsky.social @monkeybutter.bsky.social · 6d

He's only good for being an agitator. His plans & ideas change depending on who he's in front of at the time. He's never been burdened with actually having to implement his ideas for the nation.
His role so far has been commenting on what other parties have done & saying "I wouldn't have done that"

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monkeybutter.bsky.social @monkeybutter.bsky.social · 6d

The express polls are basically a group of people all hating the same thing being asked to vote on that thing they all hate like a mutual support grumbling activity.

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