Chris
@ottersf.bsky.social
Overthinker. Friend of all cats. SF gay. Unfiltered; IRL friends tread with caution.
Pinned
Chris
@ottersf.bsky.social
· Aug 6
I'm sorry I did a deep dive into your media tab and liked a bunch of pics from two years ago. In my defense, I have limited self control and you have a sushi-grade ass.
Note to self: when going hard on legs, wear darker shorts so exercise-induced precum isn't so glaringly obvious 🙃🥲
February 8, 2026 at 3:31 PM
Note to self: when going hard on legs, wear darker shorts so exercise-induced precum isn't so glaringly obvious 🙃🥲
Note to self: when going hard on legs, wear darker shorts so exercise-induced precum isn't so glaringly obvious 🙃🥲
February 8, 2026 at 3:31 PM
Note to self: when going hard on legs, wear darker shorts so exercise-induced precum isn't so glaringly obvious 🙃🥲
In preparation for our not-Super Bowl party tomorrow, I've made sangrita from sour oranges to sip with tequila/mezcal, nacho cheese using sodium citrate, three different wing sauces (Sichuan, Buffalo, and angry Korean), and dry brined 5 lbs of wings. It's killing me to have to wait until tomorrow.
February 8, 2026 at 2:31 AM
In preparation for our not-Super Bowl party tomorrow, I've made sangrita from sour oranges to sip with tequila/mezcal, nacho cheese using sodium citrate, three different wing sauces (Sichuan, Buffalo, and angry Korean), and dry brined 5 lbs of wings. It's killing me to have to wait until tomorrow.
And there's never a bad time for an upkilt shot 😈
February 6, 2026 at 6:50 PM
And there's never a bad time for an upkilt shot 😈
A fine night to get dolled up.
February 6, 2026 at 4:22 AM
A fine night to get dolled up.
Because when the world (or at least the country) is on fire, why not have a flaming cocktail in a Tiffany old fashioned glass?
February 5, 2026 at 5:04 AM
Because when the world (or at least the country) is on fire, why not have a flaming cocktail in a Tiffany old fashioned glass?
After sleeping in this morning I visited the gym at 9 pm and man I will never complain about the 5 am crowd again. 😅
February 4, 2026 at 7:27 AM
After sleeping in this morning I visited the gym at 9 pm and man I will never complain about the 5 am crowd again. 😅
February 3, 2026 at 9:20 PM
I slept for 10.5 hours last night and I feel like I could sleep 10.5 more. 😴
February 3, 2026 at 4:22 PM
I slept for 10.5 hours last night and I feel like I could sleep 10.5 more. 😴
Reposted by Chris
PUNXSUTAWNEY, PA (AP) — Sources reporting Punxsutawney Phil emerged from his slumber, uttered "m̴̞̟̞̍å̷̳̖ͅy̷͎̤͇͊́ ̴͕̰̊t̸̝̲̏̒h̸̢̯̾̆͐e̵̡͒ ̸̪̟̖͑̀͘ẹ̴͓͌t̷̬͘͝e̶̻̚ͅr̴̝͠n̵͔͊̈a̴̬̐̉ḽ̶͛ ̴̖̱̈͜w̵̻̱̔͋͒i̷̩̊n̷̩̩̭̊ț̸̱͐̔̔e̶̳͓̋̏r̵̢̊̄̓ ̵̜̌̈c̷̢̼͚̔ơ̴̢͉̐n̵̲̐s̷̜̼̖̅̎͘u̶̙͒͝m̵͎̟̪̀͆é̷̱ ̴͎̮̏t̸̟̗̔h̶̺̣͒͝i̴̟̹͗ͅs̸̟̞̾̿̕ ̵͚͖̀̕w̴̛̼̺̤͘o̷̼̊͒̄r̶̺͋l̶͎͕̈́d̶̝̹̱̎͝", and then exploded, killing multiple onlookers
February 2, 2026 at 1:42 PM
PUNXSUTAWNEY, PA (AP) — Sources reporting Punxsutawney Phil emerged from his slumber, uttered "m̴̞̟̞̍å̷̳̖ͅy̷͎̤͇͊́ ̴͕̰̊t̸̝̲̏̒h̸̢̯̾̆͐e̵̡͒ ̸̪̟̖͑̀͘ẹ̴͓͌t̷̬͘͝e̶̻̚ͅr̴̝͠n̵͔͊̈a̴̬̐̉ḽ̶͛ ̴̖̱̈͜w̵̻̱̔͋͒i̷̩̊n̷̩̩̭̊ț̸̱͐̔̔e̶̳͓̋̏r̵̢̊̄̓ ̵̜̌̈c̷̢̼͚̔ơ̴̢͉̐n̵̲̐s̷̜̼̖̅̎͘u̶̙͒͝m̵͎̟̪̀͆é̷̱ ̴͎̮̏t̸̟̗̔h̶̺̣͒͝i̴̟̹͗ͅs̸̟̞̾̿̕ ̵͚͖̀̕w̴̛̼̺̤͘o̷̼̊͒̄r̶̺͋l̶͎͕̈́d̶̝̹̱̎͝", and then exploded, killing multiple onlookers
Get in here boy. These furry tiddies ain't gonna wash themselves!
February 3, 2026 at 2:15 AM
Get in here boy. These furry tiddies ain't gonna wash themselves!
My rice portions were *wildly* off, but man having nigiri with dinner slaps.
February 2, 2026 at 3:17 AM
My rice portions were *wildly* off, but man having nigiri with dinner slaps.
Five classes I took in college:
The problem of God
Shaping national science policy
Discourse in medicine
Physical chemistry laboratory
EMT-basic certification
The problem of God
Shaping national science policy
Discourse in medicine
Physical chemistry laboratory
EMT-basic certification
Five classes I took in college:
Problems of Lyric
Hermeneutics, Multiculturalism, and Cosmopolitan Critique
The Irrational in Russian Literature
Mathematical Logic
Nietzsche
Problems of Lyric
Hermeneutics, Multiculturalism, and Cosmopolitan Critique
The Irrational in Russian Literature
Mathematical Logic
Nietzsche
Five classes I took in college:
History of the English Language
Greek Art and Architecture
Tap Dance
Scandinavian Culture Through Film
Human Osteology
History of the English Language
Greek Art and Architecture
Tap Dance
Scandinavian Culture Through Film
Human Osteology
January 31, 2026 at 6:13 PM
Five classes I took in college:
The problem of God
Shaping national science policy
Discourse in medicine
Physical chemistry laboratory
EMT-basic certification
The problem of God
Shaping national science policy
Discourse in medicine
Physical chemistry laboratory
EMT-basic certification
Reposted by Chris
Containing multitudes can sometimes be hand-mixing kewpie mayo, hot mustard, Dijon mustard, honey, and a little Tien-Tsin chile powder to make honey mustard for your Lion King-shaped vegan chikie nuggies.
January 28, 2026 at 5:55 PM
Containing multitudes can sometimes be hand-mixing kewpie mayo, hot mustard, Dijon mustard, honey, and a little Tien-Tsin chile powder to make honey mustard for your Lion King-shaped vegan chikie nuggies.
Hump day locker room jock check: ✅
January 28, 2026 at 1:44 PM
Hump day locker room jock check: ✅
Five concerts you’ve seen with women lead singers
Céline Dion
Stevie Nicks
The Pretenders
The Beaches
Reba McEntire
Bonus: The Aces
Céline Dion
Stevie Nicks
The Pretenders
The Beaches
Reba McEntire
Bonus: The Aces
Five concerts you’ve seen with women lead singers
Cher
Madonna
Lady Gaga
Janet Jackson
Celine Dion
Cher
Madonna
Lady Gaga
Janet Jackson
Celine Dion
Five concerts you’ve seen with women lead singers
Olivia Newton-John
Janet Jackson
Spice Girls
Carly Rae Jepsen
Dionne Warwick
Olivia Newton-John
Janet Jackson
Spice Girls
Carly Rae Jepsen
Dionne Warwick
January 26, 2026 at 12:04 AM
Five concerts you’ve seen with women lead singers
Céline Dion
Stevie Nicks
The Pretenders
The Beaches
Reba McEntire
Bonus: The Aces
Céline Dion
Stevie Nicks
The Pretenders
The Beaches
Reba McEntire
Bonus: The Aces
Reposted by Chris
January 25, 2026 at 2:55 PM
Pre-back day jock check
January 25, 2026 at 3:39 PM
Pre-back day jock check
Finding beta blockers stashed in the pockets of my tuxedo and silently thanking past self for helping me get through a day of being in front of people.
January 24, 2026 at 4:28 PM
Finding beta blockers stashed in the pockets of my tuxedo and silently thanking past self for helping me get through a day of being in front of people.
I'm listening to a webinar on risks and strategies for AI use in health care and I'm 83% sure the presenter is an AI construct.
January 22, 2026 at 7:14 PM
I'm listening to a webinar on risks and strategies for AI use in health care and I'm 83% sure the presenter is an AI construct.
January 21, 2026 at 5:15 PM
I wish sex parties made you rinse with Listerine on the way in the door as part of check-in. I feel like I smell like six different (hot) guys' bad breath now. 😖
January 19, 2026 at 12:15 AM
I wish sex parties made you rinse with Listerine on the way in the door as part of check-in. I feel like I smell like six different (hot) guys' bad breath now. 😖
I'm glad Heated Rivalry has finally given Threads a reason to exist, instead of just fascist ragebait that I occasionally accidentally click on from Instagram.
January 15, 2026 at 6:21 PM
I'm glad Heated Rivalry has finally given Threads a reason to exist, instead of just fascist ragebait that I occasionally accidentally click on from Instagram.